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Thread: A change is coming...

  1. #1
    Lady in Being (7/20/17) AmyGaleRT's Avatar
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    Jun 2011
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    A change is coming...

    I managed to find a therapist, and she and I have had four sessions so far. I think we've worked through a lot of the concerns about my eventual transition.

    My fiancee is sometimes scared for me, as in, "what would happen if someone tried to attack you?" I'm still fairly imposing as a woman, being 6'2" before the heels, and hopefully wouldn't make an appetizing target.

    She definitely doesn't want me having surgery. I'm still undecided about that myself, so it's a question I don't have to face, yet.

    How would I react if someone blatantly misgendered me? I had that happen once, and I think the look I gave the guy dissuaded him from his line of inquiry. The point is, though, I didn't suddenly feel like running home and hiding; I shrugged it off and carried on with what I was doing.

    Can I handle going to places that are not "safe spaces" for trans women? Certainly; I routinely go to the grocery store as Amy, for instance. (And not the local one that everyone calls "Queen Soopers," known to be frequented by the LGBT community, either! I'm not even sure where that particular store is.) I've been to Walmarts, shopping malls, Walgreens, Dollar Tree, Ulta Beauty, gift shops, restaurants, almost anyplace you'd expect a woman to go. One place I haven't visited as Amy is Micro Center...but I don't anticipate that would be a problem.

    Can I present more like an ordinary woman on a daily basis, not as made up as I might be for a party or event in the evening? Well, I convinced her that I do know the difference between "day" and "evening" makeup...but I'm conducting further experiments along those lines. The initial results are over in a thread in the Picture & Video Gallery.

    With a lot of this settled in my own mind, I have an appointment for next week, to be evaluated for HRT. I know the kind of things it might do for me and to me, but I don't know exactly what it will do for me, and whether it will be right for me. But I have to know.

    If you remember the scene in C.S. Lewis' The Magician's Nephew, where Digory is standing in the hall full of statues in Charn? There's that little bell and hammer there, and the placard that reads:

    Make your choice, adventurous stranger:
    Strike the bell and bide the danger,
    Or wonder, till it drives you mad,
    What would have followed if you had.
    I'm standing in front of that bell, right now. If I don't try it, I'll always be wondering "what might have been."

    And so I move one step closer to transition...but, even as I do, I look back at all that I've accomplished up till now, and I can only say, "Oh wow."

    - Amy
    Last edited by Nigella; 01-31-2017 at 03:27 PM. Reason: Pepperspray is classed as a weapon on this forum and therefore a banned topic
    Amy Gale Ruth Bowersox (nee Tapie) - "Be who you are, and be it in style!"
    Member, Board of Trustees, Gender Identity Center of Colorado
    aka Amelia Storm - Ms. Majestic Hearts of All Colorado 2018-2019, Miss Majestic Hearts of All Colorado 2015-2016

  2. #2
    Silver Member Rogina B's Avatar
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    Mar 2007
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    Ft Lauderdale Fl
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    Knowing of you somewhat,I will say this. You can socially transition without HRT or facial surgery and see how it works out for you.Be prepared that there may be some changes in the dynamics of your relationship as you go from "it being a fun thing" to 24/7 presenting to the world as yourself.Your job seems like it can handle accomodating a social transition in order for you to test the waters..

  3. #3
    Lady in Being (7/20/17) AmyGaleRT's Avatar
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    Jun 2011
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    So I had my appointment today...nothing much, I told the doctor my entire history of being Amy, and got an exam and a vial of blood drawn. If nothing untoward shows up, I should be on the minimum-dose HRT regimen before the end of the week.

    But what was really interesting happened afterwards...

    I went to Sonic to pick up dinner for myself and my fiancee...and the drive-through clerk called me "ma'am" over the loudspeaker.

    And I wasn't even trying to use my Amy-voice, or present as female.

    Do you believe in omens? I'm not sure if I do. But OMG, what an omen!

    - Amy
    Amy Gale Ruth Bowersox (nee Tapie) - "Be who you are, and be it in style!"
    Member, Board of Trustees, Gender Identity Center of Colorado
    aka Amelia Storm - Ms. Majestic Hearts of All Colorado 2018-2019, Miss Majestic Hearts of All Colorado 2015-2016

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