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Thread: Ask A Transsexual - Part Two

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    Ask A Transsexual - Part Two

    This forum is about transexual specific topics and this thread is for any member to ask TRANSEXUAL SPECIFIC QUESTIONS of TRANSEXUALS.
    There will be no discussion on individual responses permitted, however, a new thread can be started in the relevant forum to discuss individual responses.

    Only those members WHO IDENTIFY AS TRANSEXUALS may respond to a question, all others who respond will have their posts deleted, irrespective of the relevancy of the response.

    Members asking questions should note that one size does not fit all and when reading responses should take each response on its own merit,

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    What can I expect from HRT? Will I get breasts like my sister's?

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    Woman first, Trans second
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    The short answer is, probably not quite. The less short answer is that it depends on a lot of things, including age and genetics.

    The best answer is that there are a LOT of threads here discussing the effects of HRT, and you would do well to search them out.
    Coming out is like discovering that you've been drowning your whole life after actually breathing air for the first time.

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    A common question, and the point concerning expectations based on family is often misunderstood. Natal females - who, by and large, experience normal breast development - can expect development along the lines of the females of their family. Genetics always carry the chance of a wild card, but the way things work is that the characteristics of the most recent ancestors heavily predominate, considering the population as a whole. I.e., a girl can look to her mother, grandmothers, and perhaps great-grandmothers.

    Along comes a trans person considering HRT. Normal development? Nope, and moreover, several other factors interfere further besides. Long story short, that typical female family development is a long-shot limit for the trans person AT BEST, and most will never reach that. Those that have the best shot at even that are those who start HRT at puberty and even THEY have a few strikes against them.

    The web is full of photos of trans breast development. Lots of Tanner stage 1 - 3, some 4, very few stage 5. Tubular development. Little development. No development. Nipple development only. Etc. There's a reason that BAs are such a huge topic among TS.

    You can reasonably expect what most get, which is less than they would like.
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    A) Is post transition life what you expected it to be?

    B) If there were any advice you could give yourself pre-transition what would it be?

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    Silver Member I Am Paula's Avatar
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    A million times better.
    Start earlier.

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    Living MY Life Rachel Smith's Avatar
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    Most days are better than what I had hoped for but there is still life and work though my attitude about both is much improved.

    I would like to agree with Paula but than I would have transitioned around 1968-69 and I don't think that would have went over to well at that time thus the wait.
    My parents should have known something wasn't quite right when I kept putting Kens' head on Barbies' body Rachel Smith May 2017

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC][SIZE="3"]Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want. Dan Stanford[/SIZE][/SIZE]

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    Aspiring Member Georgette_USA's Avatar
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    Only real expectation was to live the rest of my life as the woman I was.

    I think I started about the age that was best, I could understand it and had a good start of a career. Any younger and not sure what my life would have been like. No question on any older.

    Hind sight on what to tell pre is not helpful 40 years later. Other than INVEST heavy in Microsoft.

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    Not quite what I expected. I honestly didn't expect my life to be so damn normal, and it's to the point where I'm finding it progressively more and more difficult to relate to the parts of the trans community for whom their "transness" and the community is important to them.

    My advice to my pre-transition self would be targeted at myself in 1999, living near Chicago, taking the first steps towards learning who I am. I would tell her that the things she's wondering about ARE possible. Don't wait. Seek them out.
    Coming out is like discovering that you've been drowning your whole life after actually breathing air for the first time.

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    Country Gal.... Megan G's Avatar
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    A. For me I never had any expectations of what life may look like post transition except for curing the GD. Nothing really has changed for me except for the people I associate with. I've gone from being my son's hockey coach to just another hockey mom in the stands. I would also echo Zooey's comment of not being able to relate to trans people who dwell on the trans community and have slowly distanced myself...

    Advice I would give myself is don't wait, the feelings are real, save a lot of heartache and do it now!!! Don't wait..

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    Silver Member I Am Paula's Avatar
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    Zooey, and Megan- A lot of girls are stuck in the trans community for good. It's like transitioning without coming out, and can't be healthy in the long run. I adore my trans friends, whom I see when I can, but I'm am 100% living among the muggles and loving it. My girlfriend is trans, but we just live as a girl/girl couple in a cis world.

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    A) "Is post transition life what you expected it to be?" me the only change has been that I now can have the physical attire that my brain has always imagined was there. I no longer struggle with reaching for my body parts that I know I should have always had. So very greatfull that I found the finances to have my procedures.
    B) "If there were any advice you could give yourself pre-transition what would it be?" As hard as it is to answer this truthfully I would have to say set aside the family and focus on myself only. This sounds so selfish to say but knowing what I have gone through to this point it makes perfect sence. Finances would have been there, I would have been more free to express myself in different ways without the worries of society hurting my family in any way; the list goes on.

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    Living MY Life Rachel Smith's Avatar
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    A) Far better then what I expected it to be.

    B)Why did we wait soooooooooooo loooooooooooong. Set aside family and focus on self true but I would have said it more like "F" everyone else take care of yourself but when I thought of that pre-transition it did sound soooooooo selfish.
    My parents should have known something wasn't quite right when I kept putting Kens' head on Barbies' body Rachel Smith May 2017

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC][SIZE="3"]Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want. Dan Stanford[/SIZE][/SIZE]

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    Member Mirya's Avatar
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    for everyone: Why do you think you waited so long to transition?
    Last edited by Mirya; 08-15-2017 at 03:10 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Car View Post
    What can I expect from HRT? Will I get breasts like my sister's?
    My endocrinologist said that with estrogen my body development would most likely be similar to my mother or maternal grandmother. She was right. My breasts development is similar to my mother, and what I remember of my grandmother. They are not quite as large as their's (B/B+ whereas they were both C/C+) - but by the time I saw my mother's she had been developing for, oh, 15-20 years or so - and i have only been developing mine for a year and a half. My hips are similar to both of their's - which is pretty straight hips, like I have always had. Neither of them had that hourglass shape - and neither do it.
    Last edited by Nancy Sue; 09-22-2017 at 10:25 PM.

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    New Member maryjanedee's Avatar
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    I was told the same by my doctor...similar to my mother n sister...both are DD so even a D would be nice...time will tell
    its not about how long it takes its about getting there.

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    I would not have to high of expectations for a lot of breast growth on hrt. In real life I don’t know anyone that has had much growth.

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    Silver Member IleneD's Avatar
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    Please, my sisters, excuse my possible vulgarity or crude-ness. And perhaps there's no way to politely ask about such things.
    Nonetheless, I am curious. Curious as someone who is coming to grips with being transgender, and coming out after 40 or so years of hiding. I don't know if full time transition and physical reassignment is in my future, but it's something I should consider as an option.

    However, I have a question to those who have undergone SRS (the bottom surgery) and now enjoy having the physical genitals they always needed.

    Have you taken it out for a ride yet? Have you as a re-assigned woman made love with a man (or male genitals) and actually used your vagina?
    Again, please excuse me for posting this in "Ask A Transexual" but that's the title. So I am asking. It's kind of an obvious question, and one I've not seen addressed or remarked upon.
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    Member Mirya's Avatar
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    Still too early for me since I'm still recovering from my SRS, but yes I intend to have sex with men. I'm really looking forward to it too! But I'm not going to jump into bed with just any guy though; I have high standards.

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    I guess it's like most "personal" topics, a lady does not tell

    A man is not in my future, first of all I'm still in love with the woman I married 30 years ago and hope to have many more years with her. Secondly, although I pretended to be one, I find men so unappealing that I cringe at the thought being intimate with them. My sexual orientation has not changed and I still prefer looking, but not touching, women
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    Member Mirya's Avatar
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    Back when I used to live as a guy, I was always attracted to (fascinated by?) women. But strangely I was never sexually attracted to them. In all my years living as a guy, I never even went to first base with a woman! Something in me always just seemed wrong whenever I tried to be intimate. I wasn’t attracted to men either though, as the thought of two men together just grossed me out. Needless to say I was very confused about my sexuality for a very long time, lol.

    After I accepted myself as a woman and started living full time, I slowly started to see men in a different light. I dated men and it felt totally natural and wonderful to be around them like that. Dating was actually fun for the first time! I found myself turned on by men too, especially when we touched, even if it was as simple as him putting his arm around me; something I never felt around women before my transition.

    I wouldn’t say that my sexual orientation changed after HRT and transition. Rather, living as my true self helped me understand what my true sexuality was all along.

    But it seems to me that the majority of TS women are attracted to women, not men. This is especially true for older transitioners, but I’m beginning to think it’s true across the board.

    When I was in Thailand for SRS, most of the TS girls I met (also there for their SRS) were in their 20s. And almost all of them were attracted to women too (some came with their girlfriends).

    Anyway, I don’t think there will be many responses to Ilene’s question because in my experience, most post-op TS women don’t have sex with men.
    Last edited by Mirya; 01-22-2018 at 04:45 PM.

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    Gold Member Kaitlyn Michele's Avatar
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    Many women dont want to talk about it..especially with folks that have not fully transitioned..
    on other hand one strange experience i had is pre transition two trans women literally started pulling their pants down to show me...i was like ...ummm no

    lots of girls i know have sex with men....im not that interested in talking about it with people who are not at the point of seriously doing GRS..i understand the curiousity tho..

    im older...i am sexually attracted to men...that came as a surprise to me... thing is i am SOCIALLY attracted to women.....i wonder if its classic nature vs nurture....my dates with men have been disasters...i hated every one of them...

    i dated women and enjoyed my time but could find no intimacy...

    kind of sucks for me..

    anybody that predicts their post GRS future is just playing a guessing game....
    its such a game changer you cant understand....i agree that more open younger folks might be alot more in touch with their future than people that have 40 and 50 yrs of past and the repressed feelings...

    to me, the last thing a person considering GRS should worry about is sex....
    btw...its not uncommon to lose feeling, although recent techniques are much better... and it could easily be a disaster...so if you dont really need it to feel whole, walk away...and if you...then go for the best doctor and hope the sex is good
    you will likely have a nice tight feeling for guys if thats where you are headed...my experience is the guys really like it..
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    Aspiring Member Georgette_USA's Avatar
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    I think my experience is a mixture of things.
    Like Mirya prior to transitioned loved women but could not bring myself to make love to them, it just didn't feel right in my head. Had NO interest in men.

    After my SRS I had a couple year lovemaking with an older Butch Lesbian. Something I could only dream of before SRS. Plus I had a Post MtF partner, but she was not that interested in sex.
    I did try relations with men, None knew of my background. Loved the attention and affection but sex was just not satisfying.

    Since my partner died I have gone back out to check things out. Had the same experience with one man with the same old results.
    When men think I am Trans, I usually tell them I had SRS and don't have what they want. Seems so many want Pre TS/TG, and I am not what they want.

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    Senior Member Devi SM's Avatar
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    I just ask in body issues for transexual if any of you post op, so after SRS still feeling in part the pennis.
    I ask because I've been tucking 24/7 for several years and even my own pennis is down there back between my legs, I feel it hanging down in front.
    I know that in the surgery they relocate part of the pennis creating the vagina to keep sensations.
    When a person looses a member for amputation, several report sensations like a ghost member, even sometimes pain.
    So how are the sensations there after SRS.
    I'm in transition, soon in Hormones and considering if I would go to that point.
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    Member Ariana225's Avatar
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    Sweating and HRT?

    Have any of you experienced a decrease in sweating or about the same after being on HRT? I’ve heard that the smell of your sweat changes, but does the amount you sweat change drastically enough to make a difference?

    I have problems easily sweating and was wondering if I transistion if my makeup is going to be ruined constantly 😂

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