Ask a GG - Part Two

[Robbiegirl]

I for one he adore Women ! But sometimes I'm not sure if I fell in Love with the Hollywood Version . All the Glamour !

There is a song I grew up with called " I enjoy being a girl " which has like 100 versions of it sung by Girls on You Tube . I can only wonder how many CDs have sang this during Girl time !

So as a Guy I kind of accepted the song as fact. Any thoughts on the song as a whole or some of the lines in particular ?

I always thought made Girls seem a bit silly but i always liked silly so was ok with it

I'm a girl and by me that's only great
I am proud that my silhouette is curvy
that I walk with a sweet and girlish gait
With my hips kind of swivelly and swervey
I adore being dressed in something frilly
When my date comes to get me at my place
Out I go with my Joe or John or Billy
Like a filly who is ready for the race
When I have a brand new hairdo
With my eyelashes all in curls
I float as the clouds on air do
I enjoy being a girl
When men say I'm cute and funny
And my teeth aren't teeth but pearls
I just lap it up like honey
I enjoy being a girl
I flip when a fellow sends me flowers
I drool over dresses made of lace
I talk on the telephone for hours
with a pound and a half of cream upon my face

[Di]

One of your recent threads said Yes this is a Frivolous Fun Thread
So I guess this is as well. SIGH
I get the nighties and how it feels questions ECT you ask in this thread is what you feel.
I really do not know what to say about this song you are asking about except to say it’s superficial, sexist, and objectifys.
To me being a woman is more than superficial things.
I looked it up and it was written by men and in the 1950s so I guess that explains it lol.

[MoGG]

So as a Guy I kind of accepted the song as fact. Any thoughts on the song as a whole or some of the lines in particular ?

Robbiegirl, of course it’s a fantasy. It’s from an old musical called Flower Drum Song. The character who sings it is the daughter of very strict traditional Chinese immigrants to America, a girl with a lot of responsibilities and pressure to be NOT like the girl in the song. She is fantasizing about the life she imagines other teenagers have. Richer, more popular, whiter teenagers.

The audience knows no-one really has that life. That is also why almost all the covers are obviously campy and it is so popular with drag queens - even without the original context it is clearly a fantasy of teenage girlhood.

There’s nothing wrong with a bit of escapist fantasy, of course. But I find it really hard to believe that you accepted the song as straight forward fact. Women make up the majority of the population, you must have seen some? Of course the song is about teenagers, not women, but you must know that even rich popular teenagers are worried about their grades and their futures, and practically all have hormone-induced social anxiety? Have you ever met anyone remotely like that song?

I always thought made Girls seem a bit silly but i always liked silly so was ok with it

And here’s where we get into dangerous territory. You may fantasize about being a girl who is silly. You may even enjoy this feeling. I find that hard to understand, myself. If what you mean is a fantasy of being happily irresponsible and fancy-free, then that is closer to what I imagine is the implied fantasy behind most of the camp renditions of the song.

However when you say you hear this song as a straight forward narrative of a common female experience, one we would still continue to identify with even post-adolescence - and that that experience is one of being silly... it sounds like you are saying women, as a sex, are silly.

You may like thinking of yourself as silly. Most people, including women, find it a clear negative. And when used about women it ties into old misogynistic tropes about women being bimbos, stupid, decorative and trivial.

I don’t want to crush anyone’s fantasy life. We all need fantasies. Think of yourself as a pretty butterfly of a girl with no real worries or cares, if you enjoy that! Just don’t pretend that real women aren’t also people, living the actual, complicated lives that all humans live. And, really, really, stop calling us silly - it’s offensive.

[Macey]

I know this is a stupid question. Seriously, I know this is a stupid, frivolous question. But I'll be going out en fem sooner or later, so I really could use the advice.

Here goes …

GGs … what essential items should a woman have in her purse? (besides money, keys, ID, etc)

I know, I know … silly question, but it would give me a little confidence to hear what I might need when out and about!

[char GG]

@Robbiegirl,
Of course the song is pure fantasy. MoGG & Di explained it very well. I remember the song played on the radio in the 60’s by different artists. None of my friends nor I liked it, thought it was obviously dumb. Kind of like the old Alley Opp song (about a cartoon character). We didn’t think that was about real men, either.

@Macey
Take your cell phone. Oh, and a mini flashlight.

[MoGG]

“GGs … what essential items should a woman have in her purse? (besides money, keys, ID, etc)”

Not a stupid question. I’m deliberately giving advice a man might be less likely to think of here.

Extra hair ties or pins, depending on your hairstyle. They both have a tendency to break or fall out.

If you are going out made up some make-up removing wipes. I don’t wear makeup often, so am prone to forgetting and rubbing my mascara and the smudges need something stronger than water to budge.

In my day bag I take a tiny sewing kit for fallen buttons, downed hems and split seams. This is very old-fashioned advice, but I’ve helped a lot of people with quick repairs.

Continuing with old fashioned advice, I personally never wear nylon pantyhose but people who do should keep some clear nail polish around to stop ladders when they are still small.

And the one bit of advice I always follow myself:

Take a small but well laden e-reader to concerts, conferences and similar events. You never know when you are going to get stuck in a queue to the toilets, usually longer for women as we physically need to go more frequently and can’t use urinals to speed the process. I don’t deal with boredom well. E-reader apps on a mobile phone work well.

[Macey]

Thank you Mo! Was back and forth about the wipes, so you've convinced me! Purse is too small for a reader, so phone will have to do. Normally, I bring a wee crossword book, but that may be too bulky. I don't normally wear pantyhose, so I'll forgo the clear polish for now. Hair ties and pins are already in!

Good thought on the wee sewing kit!

Thank you so much

[Di]

Not a stupid question at all.
It’s real life
I have a crossbody I carry to work and in it I carry just dL & debit card and lippy.
But in a larger purse
I put my wallet into the large, main compartment of your purse. ...
I put together a small toiletry kit of items like wipes , and tissues. ...
I Fill a small makeup bag with lotion, lip balm, and any cosmetics. ...usually powder and lippy
Set my keys in a small, secure side pocket. ...
Put my phone in a smaller section where it won't get lost and easy to get to.
I try to follow this each time so I can go to the right place without digging in my purse .
Hope this helps

[Macey]

Thank you Di, this is a smaller purse, so no to makeup bag, but I'll be dropping a few essential makeup items. Yes to keeping it organized as best as possible! Already musing over which pocket(s) for toiletries, which for make up touch up items, which for cash and cards, etc. My knuckle-dragging three-back hands will be fumbling with this for a while until I get used to it

[So Newbie]

A familiar question. I’m at the beginning of what might become a relationship. I’ve come to the conclusion that I’d be doing her and myself a disservice to try and hide this part of myself, and so if we reach a certain ill-defined point, I would like to come out to her. I have a sense of when that might be appropriate but I’m unsure of how. Any suggestions would be much appreciated.

Hi Kim- my bf told me he was a cd one month into our dating. At the time the relationship was so new that I didn’t put a lot of thought to what that was going to mean for the future. As time passed and we got closer, I realized that cd is a part of him, makes him the man he is and who I have fallen in love with. He and I communicate very well, which I’m so grateful because I can say what I’m feeling and we work through it. I have shared custody of my children and I have them a week at a time. This allows us to have a week to devote to our relationship and a week he can dress freely without me around. We have worked up to the point where I’m ok with him wearing women’s bikini panties when he’s with me. we have agreed on the details of the panties(no bows/lace/or PINK staring me in the face, lol). I still struggle with with the idea that he is a cd’er but we work on boundaries that we can both live with. One should not sacrifice their happiness for the other. My best advise is to talk and listen. There is no wrong or right way either of you need to feel. You are both allowed to have the feelings you have. It takes work and some days it’s harder than others. For me it’s a daily work in progress. Best of luck!!

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Great thread Char!!! Thanks for making it.

If you were in a relationship w/ a guy who occasionally liked to dress (lingerie, dresses, & makeup to the 9s type dressing), would you still be able to view him as a masculine man when he wasn't en femme or would the knowledge that he liked to CD alter your perception of him, even if he was otherwise a very masculine guy?

I've never told a girl that I was in a relationship w/ about my dressing (even though I would love to in the hopes they'd be ok w/ it and even help me w/ my makeup and fashion) for the fear that the 10% of the time that I was dressed would skew their perception of me the other 90% of the time.

I’ve been with my bf for about 10 months. I have known for 9. The only thing I’ve seen him in is panties and the workout type leggings,but not until I was ready. Honestly, I’m terrified to see him in much more for the fact my perception will change. I don’t want to see that persona when I’m in bed and trying to be intimate. It was hard for me to be turned on by the black and pink lace panties he used to wear. (We have since agreed to boundaries on that, which has made a big difference when we are being intimate). He has express to me that his NEED for me to be involved with the dressing is very little to nothing at all. But his WANT for me is to shop and give advise when he dresses. It’s always evolving and communication is the key. But, both of you need to be comfortable in the boundaries you set. Best of luck!!