Living with roommates

[Spiritfox]

I know a lot of the members here encounter trouble being closeted from their SO. I'm having some different troubles. I live in a one bedroom apartment with 3 roommates. 4 if you count the one who dates one of the roommates but doesn't officially live with us. With the small space and no personal space, I have virtually no opportunities to dress up. I've come out to one of the roommates, but I don't want to come out to the other 3 or start dressing in front of them.

Can anyone offer me advice on this situation? Many months in my boring men's clothes is starting to frustrate me

[Rhonda Darling]

Uh, a one bedroom apartment with 4 unrelated people living in it? Does the landlord know? Does the city know? Why would you live under such conditions as a crossdresser? Find yourself a place with your own bedroom, with a lockable door at a minimum.

If you're truly stuck in that situation, you need a frriend who knows about Spiritfox and who will let you stash your clothes and other girly stuff and use their place to change back and forth. Where there is a will, there should be a way.

[emilamb]

Four, sometimes five people in one bedroom? Yikes. I imagine crossdressing isn't the only issue. How many bathrooms do the five of you have in that one-bedroom apartment? And the person dating your roommate, how bad is their place that they join your bedroom rather than your roommate going to theirs?

My only advice is to find a new place. If money is the issue, consider moving further from the city center. Ask yourself how much of a commute would you put up with if it meant getting to crossdress whenever you want?

[Lana Mae]

Bottom line: if you want to cd, you need to find a better place! Hugs Lana Mae

[CONSUELO]

Gracious! How do you all fit in to a one bedroom apartment. You have two options. The first is to find another place, the second is to tell everyone and hope they accept you dressing openly. You didn't mention how well you get along with your roommates, so it is hard to think of what else you could do. What do you want to do. Are you hoping that you can dress at the apartment or do you want to dress there and go elsewhere?

[Diane Taylor]

I think the answer to your question is somewhat obvious. You need a place of your own with complete privacy. And now that you've come out to ONE of your room mates it's VERY possible that now they all know about your crossdressing. Crossdressing aside, living with that many room mates is a problem no matter what. Just saying ......

[Kelly DeWinter]

if you have come out to one, the others probably know by now. or if anyone has gone through your things, again you may be out.

I that close of an environment, be yourself.

[Spiritfox]

To those of you who asked, we are allowed to have 4 people living here. And we're all close friends, and we manage to run a very nice living space, which is why the 5th one enjoys spending time with us.

[Tomara]

Hi ,
It's nice to hear that you are able to make you're living arrangement work in male mode and I'm sorry that you don't have the privacy that you need to express your feminine side , do you have any friends or family members who you trust to come out to that you could possibly store your wardrobe with and use as a place to relax and enjoy your feminine side ?
Best of luck to you .

[~Joanne~]

even if it's allowed, I would pack my things and hit the road. there is no way I could live in a space like that even without the CDing being involved. That's a tad too much. It's starts as 4, then came the 5th and by time your all seeing someone, it's 8 people in a one bedroom apartment. That's insane.

[Jean 103]

First you need your own room. Second you need to change to a situation where everybody in the house knows you're transgender. I am out and have two roommates. A long with all their friends and my friends. They all know me as Jean. No matter how I'm presenting everyone refers to me with female pronouns. I have found this is easier for everybody to understand. Yeah sometimes they slip up but they don't say it in a mean way so it doesn't really matter.

[Exris]

Well my situation is like this.

I live in a 1 bedroom flat just outside London. Those familiar with the property market will know why thats the case...

The "flat" is a converted property. So... I have my own room - own bathroom - own kitchenette area if you could call it that. But it's not a true stand-alone property. If I want a proper kitchen with an actual cooker - I use a shared area. Same for the larger freezer compartments. I can dress in my own area and do. But I cant walk around much. 7 or 8 steps. Not good enough.

I can afford I suppose to trade upgrade I suppose. But I would be getting so little extra for a ruck ton of money... and I love treating myself and my daughter to FANTASTIC holidays...

So I do it at work on a weekend sometimes. Full length mirror in the ladies. I am one of only 2 alarm key holders. I slyly enquire from the other what they are up to on a weekend that Im planning to almost live in work. It's a nice place. Couches. Kitchen area. Shower. Huge TV. Games room. All camera's are EXTERNAL.

One day I might get caught. But for now it's enough.

[Jennifer_Ph]

Leave a pair of pantyhose to dry on the shower curtain rod. Go from there. :-)

[Spiritfox]

Well my situation just changed. One of my roommates is getting kicked out. We warned himbefore he went to rehab if he relapsed on his alcoholism he couldn't live with us anymore, so now I just have 2 roommates

[Steph65]

You are your own demise. You have to deal with what you got. I am sure you know this as mature as you are. This is really a no brainer. Honestly I think you know the answer before hand. I think you needed reinforcement on your decision. The question should be do I come out to all my roomies? I won't apologize for getting to the point but lets face it you put yourself in this situation and you have one of 2 choices. JMHO

[Alice_2014_B]

I'm in about the same boat.
It's four of us in a 2 bed/2 bath.
Wife knows and supports, two roomies (dating couple around my age) are really cool, but do not know.

It's funny how I'll do stand-up fully an femme in front of strangers but I don't desire the roomies to know or see.

They generally stay in their bedroom which has its own closed of bathroom.

One thing I do is casually ask what their work/class schedules are.

Look for opportunities to house/pet-sit for friends and family (I'm about to have 10 days to myself for this).