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Thread: No one seems to care when dressed casually ...

  1. #1
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    No one seems to care when dressed casually ...

    A few days ago i was on a flight to China, and decided to wear a very comfy sweatshirt dress with some a shinny leggings. Also had my nails dark purple and very visible make up. I'm not trying to pass, so clearly a man. I'm now at the bar of my hotel in Shanghai wearing the same dress with black tights. No one seems to care or even look at me. Just amazing.

    Last week I saw a cross dresser walking in a Dutch city called maastricht. She was overdressed at 10am on a rainy day, and although she looked I think really classy, I noticed how people would look at her.

    It almost seems to me that we get more noticed when trying to pass over dressed, but not when dressing as woman would normally do?

  2. #2
    Senior Member BrendaPDX's Avatar
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    I find the same thing, under dress and you are almost invisible, dress nice you stand out. Not to long ago I was out underdressed to pass and nobody seemed to notice me, I was almost a little disappointed. Dress nice like on a work luch break and people seem to look closer. Brenda

  3. #3
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    When I dress not to be noticed? It's to the 9's! In private, at home-----------------
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  4. #4
    Senior Member Jaymees22's Avatar
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    I would guess if your dressed casually or to blend you are dressed like most other women and no one will notice. So even as a cis-gender female really dressed up or over dressed for the circumstances will get noticed, so will we.
    I enjoy being a boy, being a GIRL like me!!!

  5. #5
    Silver Member Micki_Finn's Avatar
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    I don't know that comparing "public" reaction to CDs in China vs Netherlands is really an apples and oranges comparison. It doesn't matter how casual or dressed I am, I'm going to get very different reactions in Saudi Arabia than I would in San Francisco.

  6. #6
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Or, Cambodia, Micki. Where instead being put off or offended, they were openly curious!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  7. #7
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    Perhaps people were looking at that person in Maastricht because she was dressed so well and stood out. I certainly take more notice of women who are dressed well as I am interested in how they present themselves. It is also a pleasure to see a well-dressed person. There are not many around theses days.

  8. #8
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    It almost seems to me that we get more noticed when trying to pass over dressed, but not when dressing as woman would normally do?[/QUOTE]

    I agree.
    I have been saying that on here for years. Some here get mad when I say that and for the life of me I don't see why.

  9. #9
    Member Ashley090's Avatar
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    So far in China ppl seem totaly okay with crossdressers. But hey, got advantage of that and enjoy that time!
    "Do not care what others think, do what you must" - Javik, ME3

  10. #10
    Gold Member Read only Rachael Leigh's Avatar
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    I've had a few simaler experiences when dressed casual too, I've gone out to say Walmart in my ladies workout stuff and yep I know it's Walmart but it seems like nobody pays any attention, but then I really don't want any I just want to be me

  11. #11
    Transgender Person Pat's Avatar
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    To be fair, you're in the largest city in China. The nature of life in large cities promotes a certain amount of acceptance.
    I am not a woman; I don't want to be a woman; I don't want to be mistaken for a woman.
    I am not a man; I don't want to be a man; I don't want to be mistaken for a man.
    I am a transgender person. And I'm still figuring out what that means.

  12. #12
    Silver Member Majella St Gerard's Avatar
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    If I went to the mall dressed the way I go to the club I would draw a lot of attention, dress for the location and not over the top and you will pass with little notice.

  13. #13
    Stop that, it's silly.... DIANEF's Avatar
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    I spend a lot of time observing what women wear, and when I go out I wear the same things pretty much, so although I dress well I blend but certainly do not stand out.
    Here today, gone tomorrow....

  14. #14
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    This is one of the big differences between TS's and closet CD's. TS's simply want to present as women.

    While some of us CD's only want to present as pretty, stylish women. Which is why I have no interest in going to vanilla venues dressed. Is that so wrong?
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Micki_Finn View Post
    It doesn't matter how casual or dressed I am, I'm going to get very different reactions in Saudi Arabia than I would in San Francisco.
    You probably would be encouraged to jump from a high place. Saudi is not CD friendly.


    When I passed I still attracted looks. Today I wear comfortable clothes as the women of my age wear. I've long known that the more outstanding you are the more scrutiny you will receive. My wife who happens to be very pretty with a great figure has attracted attention through out her life as have our daughters. When we have been out the stares are amusing. The girls have laughed and gotten mad about the old leachers trying to look down their tops or accidentally brush their hand against them.

  16. #16
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    Casual dressing in daylight hours is the most comfortable position you can be in I think. :-)
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  17. #17
    Gold Member Lana Mae's Avatar
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    Observe the women where you are and wear what they wear. You should blend in with no problem. IMHO Hugs Lana Mae
    Life is worth living!
    "Foxy lady! You look so good!!" Jimi Hendrix

  18. #18
    Member Mark B's Avatar
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    I started a thread last week about going to a car show dressed in women's jeans, 3" boots, a sheer blouse and a black camisole under it. I wore no make up, left the breast forms and hip pads at home along with the wig. Just a bald headed old man wearing something different. I felt very comfortable, talked with just about everybody that showed the same interest in a car we were looking at with no problems at all. I even had one woman tell me I was the best dressed man she had seen at the show. Of course, I was only visited the Porsche hall and the Mercedes hall and some of the Italian manufacturer's halls. I think that the people that are interested in those cars have a bit more class to ignore and go about their own business anyway. I did on purpose stay away from the American auto area, and yes we have rednecks in Germany as well. I did not think I was over dressed. Well, they were skinny jeans As Steph said, no seems to care if not over doing it.
    Last edited by Mark B; 03-15-2017 at 01:17 PM.
    I was told I have balls for wearing skirts! My reply? "That's because balls this big won't fit in pants!"

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    Quote Originally Posted by Pat (aka Jennie) View Post
    To be fair, you're in the largest city in China. The nature of life in large cities promotes a certain amount of acceptance.
    Yes, you are right. I went out again this evening to get a foot massage wearing a smocked jeans dresses and my shinny leggings (see the attached). Totally accepted, and the foot massage was delightful.

    However, I've also been to smaller cities without problems in North America and Europe. I had once an issue at a Desigual store in NYC (the manager strangely told me that the store was for women), and a hotel near Boston where the manager playfully commented on my boots and stockings.

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    Quote Originally Posted by Martha B View Post
    I started a thread last week about going to a car show dressed in women's jeans, 3" boots, a sheer blouse and a black camisole under it.
    I just found and read your story. Delightful ...and that lady must have been fun to interact with. Did you interact with her in German? Did you meet her again wearing a skirt?

    I just feel more comfortable wearing women's clothing in male mode than trying to pass for a woman, which I'm not. Actually, I don't even consider myself a crossdresser or transgender, but a man who likes feminine clothing and is very comfortable to show it in public. I found that I get more acceptance when I'm not trying to pass for someone I'm not.

    I'll wear my sweatshirt dress tomorrow morning (with tights) for breakfast at my hotel in Shanghai. I'll probably also wear boots and make-up!
    Attached Images Attached Images

  20. #20
    Member Mark B's Avatar
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    yeah, like you Steph I feel more comfortable when I'm in man mode when wearing something girlie and not trying to be somebody i'm not. I only now do the full woman look on weekends when I go out with the wife. She is more comfortable when I dress that way. During the week we go out together with me in full male mode although under-dressed
    I was told I have balls for wearing skirts! My reply? "That's because balls this big won't fit in pants!"

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Steph70kk View Post
    I just feel more comfortable wearing women's clothing in male mode than trying to pass for a woman, which I'm not. Actually, I don't even consider myself a crossdresser or transgender, but a man who likes feminine clothing and is very comfortable to show it in public. I found that I get more acceptance when I'm not trying to pass for someone I'm not.

    I'll wear my sweatshirt dress tomorrow morning (with tights) for breakfast at my hotel in Shanghai. I'll probably also wear boots and make-up!
    Great observation, Steph. I think everyone notices, we just don't get the same reactions. Just like any gg I would like for every girl to compliment my appearance, however I want it to be sincere & not just bc I look like a freak. I like the explanation doc sherry gave about ts v cd... I just don't know where I fit in. At home I want to dress out to the 9's. But if I go out in public I want to be perceived as just peacocking.

    I wrote a similar thread about this a week ago ("Thank you, Sir") wherein I was dressed somewhat to blend. I thought I was moderately dressed - ladies tee, bright red lipstick & eyeliner, size "c" breast forms, but w my regular mens jeans. There was no way she didn't notice but referred to me as 'Sir'. There is no way she didn't notice my appearance, but I was flattered still.

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    I'm out again this time in the Netherlands wearing a casual dark blue hoodie dress, grey tights and ankle boots ... walked into town earlier, now eating at the restaurant at my hotel ... again no one seems to care to see a man in a dress ... couples are busy talkIng, singles looking at their phones ... maybe I would be noticed wearing a wedding dress :-)

  23. #23
    Junior Member Tiffany in heels's Avatar
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    I don't know how many of you are from Los Angeles but here more men are wearing the same clothing as women. The new style are men's leggings (meggings). Almost everyone is wearing it in the gym. You cannot go out without seeing guys wearing leggings at least once anymore. Some wear shorts over them but many don't. Women's sweaters and tops seem to be the new norm with millennials. If I were to wear a women's top and leggings, no one would blink twice and probably think I just came from the gym. I'm not even from the west side area and that's what I see. Anyone from LA that can confirm what I'm saying? South Bay Area here.

  24. #24
    Senior Member jjjjohanne's Avatar
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    Whenever I go out, it is as a man. But I will wear skirts or dresses occasionally. I get occasional looks. Normally, I am the only one in pantyhose. Often I am more dressy than others. I do not wear "club wear" or anything dramatically different. People look and then seem to go on with their business. I have had good outings like this many times recently. I go out in rather conservative areas with no unpleasant consequences. I avoid going to crime-rich areas, and I avoid places where "rough" people might be found.
    I am a man who presents male and wears feminine clothes.
    I blog about my outings: https://joeypress.wordpress.com/

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