So grateful to be a cross dresser now, rather than in the past

[LizL]

The pink fog has been all consuming lately.

Today I ordered some accessories off eBay, a cute plum-colored dress on Amazon for $10, and then on the way home I visited Goodwill and got a cute nautical themed Talbots purse ($10) and some late 80s/early 90s JC Penney white granny panties, 3 still in the package, for $3!

Awaiting in the mail box when I got home was a nice lace garter belt, and a cute pink floral strapless bra (both from eBay).

OK, enough bragging...the point of my post was that I thought about how much of this easy, fast, and convenient shopping for women's clothes and accessories wasn't available say 20/25 years ago.

I can't imagine how difficult it was for our sisters in other eras.

Difficult or impossible to shop, no forum like we have here to share our thoughts, etc. etc.

Grateful for today's bargains, but even more grateful that technology has helped make things so much easier for us.

[Robin777]

Back in the day when they had catalogs that came to your home ,you could order just about anything and get it delivered. It wasn't as easy as it is now. Then you had to wait for the paper catalog to come in the mail so you could go through it. Plus there always have had thrift stores to shop at. I have purchased a lot of clothing back in the dark ages from thrift stores.

[Leslie Langford]

Tell me about it, Liz!...I'm old enough to remember buying women's clothes through the Sears catalogs and having to place my order over the phone with a female operator at the other end. Funny how my "sister/wife" ended up with such an extensive wardrobe of clothes at the time (including some fine lingerie ) despite this type of roadblock/impediment and all the anxiety that accompanied conducting a purchase transaction in that way. That just goes to show yet again the power of the "pink fog" when it gets hold of a person, and when one has an urge that will not be denied. Then, of course, there was always that small matter of having to pick up said goods at the catalog counter when they arrived with the contents of the packages clearly listed on the outside.

Did they ever suspect? I'll never know, and the order takers certainly never let on although I did get the sweetest smiles at times when I went to pick up my orders. Yes, things these days - including the increasing popularity of self-checkout counters - have certainly made it a lot easier for the bashful crossdresser to assemble their female wardrobe. Then again, what we "oldsters" had to go through back in the day definitely tested our mettle, and if nothing else - built character while at the same time reinforcing our lifelong love affair with female clothing...

[Dana44]

Yeah it was the sears catalog and when the Victoria Secret came out wow. Now it is so easy. I remember when I bought some stuff from Walmart many years ago. The SA asked if they were for me with frown on her face. She told me why do all you pretty men do that? Yeah kinda embarrassing. But now it is far better, even at Walmart.

[Kelly DeWinter]

LOL,

This would probably be my life at another time.


Another Time.jpg

I re-purposed this comic as an alternative fact

[LizL]

Dana if she called you pretty, she sorta answered her own question, LOL.

[DIANEF]

Things are much easier nowadays though conversely it is relatively recently that I have been openly buying things for myself, rather than 'for my wife'. Not forgetting all the info at your fingertips on Google and Youtube.

[DanielleDubois]

Leslie, I also used the Sears route but could order online. When I went to pick up stuff up I could never believe how large of a font they used to print out the contents; to me it looked like a billboard and the SA might as well have yelled out" Would the crossdresser please come pickup their order!"
As for support like this forum it really didn't exist even just 25 years ago, there were only magazines etc that you had to buy at an adult book store. I also remember using a dial up internet connection and waiting for a small blurry image of a crossdresser posted on a BBS to take 1/2 an hour to download. Ah, the good old days, I really don't miss them except for my slimmer figure back then.

[sweetdreams]

I never ordered from Sears, but I did order from Fredericks of Hollywood. This would have been back in the early 70's.

Sizes are much better these days (i.e. stocking sizes).

[Teresa]

LizL,
So right Liz , I know I've told this story before. We had a nice department in town and I always waited for the sales to look through their underwear section, I asked a SA if she could help me, the shop was filling up, so she turned to the SA across the shop and shouted lady's underwear for the gentleman ! I turned as red as the underwear I was trying not to look at ! I didn't leave empty handed I bought the panties and suspender belt , I'm too determined not to miss a bargain .

Yes it has got easier, I still prefer to shop in retail shops and get the interaction with the sales staff, I'd miss that fun .

[Sami Brown]

I had forgotten about the good old days of BBS downloads over dialup. It's a good thing that I didn't realize I was a crossdresser until high speed broadband! Having so many sources of information and wardrobe choices available at our fingertips (polished, of course) has made everything so much easier.

[Ineke Vashon]

Ah, Sears, Fredericks, Michael Salem catalogues. Such wonderful reading material in the outhouse. And to tear out the men's pages for double duty.

Ineke

[Stephanie Julianna]

That is an understatement. Until I was 15 I thought I was the only boy in the world that wanted to dress like a girl. There was Christne Jorgenson and April Ashley on the cover of the tabloids but somehow they seemed mystical and were presented more like a side show act. I used to have to tell salespeople that I was buying a gift for my sister or had to buy replacement underwear as a punishment for turning my sisters' stuff grey or pink in the wash because of a tee shirt or something. Now I just buy what I want in glam or drab and don't raise an eyebrow.

[Kate Simmons]

We just kind of "winged it" back in the old days. Made up stories to store clerks(mostly women) when buying stuff, did mail order whenever possible. Went out at night to drive around for the most part. Also tough to shave logs in those days, so made the best of it with 3 pairs of pantyhose and the like. Still as limited as it was, it was satisfying to me.

[GretchenM]

Kate,
Three pairs of panty hose? Holy cow. That is a recipe for heat stroke. At least for me. When a teenager I would secretly put on panty hose for skiing on extra cold days. Works great. I thought I was being very creative. Then I found out lots of skiers did that. Maybe that explained why on cold days there was often a line for the stalls in the men's bathroom. Of course, I did it for other reasons than warmth which was really just a secondary benefit. But still, men that did that were very careful to not get found out, gender issues or not. Makes me wonder how many had those other motivations than keeping warm and just kept it secret and smiled a lot. Ah, the things we had to do back then to satisfy our puzzling urges and desires.

[Jamie Christopher]

I'm with Leslie & Stephanie, the days of the JC Penney and Sears catalogs, as well as black & white full page lingerie ads in the newspaper; what great memories. No more going into the local JC Penney catalog outlet, and up to the counter to pick up my order; now a few clicks and voila!

Jamie

[Judy-Somthing]

Finding 12W 4" heels in the 70's was impossible.
Typically 12W woman's shoes were low heel and far from sexy.

[Stephanie47]

The problem in my youth was not so much an inability to purchase woman's clothing as it was to survive the psychological torture of the day. I'm talking about the 1960's. There was no Internet. Reading material was really limited. The Kinsey Report was kept behind the librarian's desk at the local public library. The corner newspaper store did have Playboy. That was it. Yes, I could look at the advertisements in the local newspaper, The Daily News. There were two women's clothing stores on Broadway that had mannequins in the window. There was a city bus stop in front of one of the stores. I always waited for the bus to come, but, never got on it. Oh, the mannequins with corsets, longline bras, and girdles. How does one buy clothing with no where to hide them in a small apartment with a mom, dad, brother and sister? Torture. Then, the societal norms and expectations. I was totally confused. Society deemed I had to be gay. I wasn't. I drooled over girls. How could this be? A warm blooded teenager with an aching erection, and, he likes to wear his mother's clothing. Sigh!

Yes, all you youngsters really do not know how good you have it as far as purchasing clothing. Hiding it from your wife or parents may still pose a problem. No? Yes! Home delivery to anything you wanted. Internet access to all sorts of material. Break! Break! Got to go pick up my wife. Back later to finish!

[JeanTG]

I remember the Sears catalogue as well. Bought my first outfits and lingerie from them. But did buy my first breast forms from a mastectomy shop that I had heard would discretely help girls like "us". Called up and indeed, they had one SA willing to work with me. This is in the early '80s.

Fast forward. This week I was in the mood for some nice accessories. Went into a shop (part of a chain) specializing in such. Quiet afternoon, just an attractive early 50ish SA. Started by asking for some clip-on earrings. Then I said "they're for me, I like to dress in women's clothes". She said "no problem" in a way that really meant she had *no* problem, and was very helpful, pointing out items on sale, etc. So in addition to the earrings, I came out with a faux pearl necklace, a nice fashion watch, a lovely pink scarf with gold leaf trim, sunglasses and hair barrettes.

Ditto for my clothes and lingerie now, I just shop openly (so far only in drab... just a matter of time before I attempt en femme, still a bit of makeup work to do). So far I have found nothing but helpful staff.

Still a problem with my wife though...

[Leelou]

While I agree with your premise that Internet shopping, and especially Ebay are great, I did pretty well shopping in person before that technology existed. lol.

The saying goes, where there's a will there's a way. As soon as I was out of the house, I was out buying my own women's clothing and have some pretty fond memories of those times. Even way back then in the stone age, people just didn't care that there was a man in the store buying women's clothes.

Again, I agree that the Internet is great, but it's fun reminiscing about the "old days" and hearing the other girls' stories.

[Sandin Meknickers]

Imagine trying to order clothes 500 years ago. Mind you, it all looked girly then.

Had you your modern sensibility in 1510, would you be so keen to wear girls clothes? Does anybody gush over those undergarments lol?

[Amelie]

For me I don't think it was all that difficult to live a life being transgender, even though that word wasn't used back then. In a way it was probably easy cause of where I lived, in NYC. I could shop in any store and buy anything I wanted, no dirty looks no surprises. For me to learn about being trans and who I was I moved to Times Square area where there were other people like me. OK, most of these girls were working girls but they had experience that I needed to learn, also street smarts. But for the most part I was a loner and learned much on my own, no need for books. A book wasn't going to tell me something I already knew, that I was a girl.

There was a cd store in NYC called Lees Mardi Gras, it possibly became Michael Salem but I am not sure. Cd,s could shop at Lees with no worries, Lee's carried large sized shoes, wigs and an assortment of clothes. I went there on occasion cause I had two friends work there and Lee was big on cd rights/politics. I felt that I owed it to Lee to shop there.

Probably a bad part back then compared to today is dealing with authorities like the police. The police were not always kind to the transgender. One was not treated well if they were arrested. I think it's a bit better today.

One think I like about today is the technology. I am able to use the internet to find people from my past. I have found only one trans person so far from the past, and she's on this site. But we didn't hang out too much together, I remember her but we only met at one trans bar and didn't go anywhere else.. I think the people I hung out with more are probably dead but I keep searching.

So, I don't think for me it was more difficult than it is for today's people. From the stories I read on forums like this I would say I had it much easier than quite a few people. I had the usual problems of youth but I would have had them no matter what my gender was, just something living in NYC brings.

[lingerieLiz]

In the late 50s and since, I never had a problem shopping. I did have a store manager tell me that girls (sisters) didn't wear nylon panties. They wore rayon. I let her sell me a day of the week set. Little did she know that I had on nylon panties. I did wear the day of the week set though.

I would go into the women's store and tell them what I wanted for my whomever. I quickly realized that I wasn't fooling anyone. From time to time one would offer to let me try something on or tell me "you can bring it back if it doesn't fit". When I worked at the department store and sales were coming up a couple of the women would tell me you need to buy this for your sister or girl friend. They knew it was for me. After I started going out dressed, I did shop at some of the same stores.

Early on I didn't know that it was illegal for men to dress as women in most places until the late 60s. I was very lucky I guess.

[ginapoodle]

Michael Salems, NYC

There also were some large size, mail order shoe shops.

[Tina_gm]

Due to these forums, and a little more acceptance has led to my self realization of being who I am, and my growing acceptance of myself.

As for shopping, I haven't done a lot. What I have done though I've never experienced any negativity. I've never explained who I was buying for.... the sales people either are so oblivious to what they are even scanning, assuming I'm making a purchase for a woman, or simply don't care that I'm making it for myself.

Oddly, the worst stare I have ever got was from a couple of crotchety 70 Ishmael old women in a nail salon, and I was in total drab, nothing even androgynous, and I wasn't even getting anything done, I was simply waiting for my wife. (I did get a massage) but that was done so I'm just sitting in the waiting area thumbing through mags. Apparently to them a man even being in there was some sort of a crime. I can only imagine how poisonous their old minds must be.... Definitely a product of the most ultra conservative 50s.

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70ish... sorry. Phone likes to play pranks on me.