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Thread: Will someone you know recognize you while en femme?

  1. #26
    Gold Member Lana Mae's Avatar
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    When I came out to my sister in law, I gave her a picture like my avatar and told her it was someone she knew! She was totally stumped! I then told her it was me!
    Recently my son came to visit, I was out to him verbally but he had never seen Lana Mae! I showed him most of my pics( various shots from the transformation!) and he said he would walk right past me on the street if I looked like that! I think the make up and the wig will make or break you! IMHO Hugs Lana Mae
    Life is worth living!
    "Foxy lady! You look so good!!" Jimi Hendrix

  2. #27
    Silver Member NancySue's Avatar
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    My wife doesn't think so 😉 She checks me over and may make a suggestion or two. I follow her advice always. Sometimes, I like to dress a little more...makeup, heels, hose, etc., which we both feel would attract. We live in a small town where everyone's business is known. Discovery would not be good. We are careful when we go out, usually out of town to a shopping center to shop, dine and see a movie. I've seen a few people I knew...from a distance..so far, so good.

  3. #28
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    It's highly doubtful unless they would hear my voice. I look nothing like Rich en femme.
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

  4. #29
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    I'm a quite large hulking presence. I'd be unmistakable for anything other than a man in a dress, and my body type & size is past the 99th percentile. People recognize me from behind from a distance at flea markets, bank lines, from a block away, etc.. So, yeah, I'd be spotted pretty quick. While being huge is a definite advantage in some situations, when trying for anonymity is not one of those times. When I was at a flea market with someone, and she wanted to go look at something a bit far away, I told her to just call my cell phone when she was done, in order to find me. Her response, 'Oh, that's not necessary. I just look for one of the heads poking out from the top of the crowd'. This had never occurred to me before, as to me, I have to look through a whole crowd when trying to find an average sized person. But when looking for someone significantly taller, it's pretty easy to spot us.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  5. #30
    I am me! TrishaTX's Avatar
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    I think more women would recognize me then men. No-one would think I Crossdress , so that would throw them as well.
    Last edited by TrishaTX; 06-27-2017 at 09:08 PM.
    No regrets except I should have got dressed & stepped out sooner.

  6. #31
    Silver Member Jodi's Avatar
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    Recognition would not depend upon looks, but giveaways would be voice, and body gestures.

    jodi

  7. #32
    Aussie girl enjoying life Michelle (Oz)'s Avatar
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    Not so far in over 1000 outings. Of course I don't speak to anyone I know that would be a give away.

  8. #33
    Emerging Diva Nikki A.'s Avatar
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    I don't think that I look that different, but we are our toughest critics. Twice when I dressed for Halloween once at a party and another time I went to another office at work. Both times it took people a couple of minutes to figure out who I was ( both times it was when I opened my mouth). Another time was when I came out to my accountant, she had no idea who was waiting for her ( she was expecting me not Nikki). All these situations were early on in my dressing. My accountant now says I am doing a much better presentation, which is encouraging.
    Basically, when you add a wig, a little body shaping, boobs and make up, the cues are female and that is what most people will see. However your car may out you, or if you're with your SO then people may look for you if they see her.

  9. #34
    Gold Member Diane Smith's Avatar
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    The one time I ran into a work colleague while out and about, she recognized me instantly. (And wasn't freaked at all. We had a nice conversation.) I wasn't wearing wigs then but still trying to fake it with my receding male hair. I think it would be more difficult to recognize me nowadays, but I wouldn't bet the farm on it.

    - Diane

  10. #35
    Senior Member mbmeen12's Avatar
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    It so dynamic that I would get that double take look.
    Escapism isn't necessarily bad, but is definitely unhealthy in the long term. While helpful in the short term, things will degrade over time. At some point, the escapee will have to face the issue. Things simply blowing over isn't really going to happen in many situations.

  11. #36
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    Iris,
    To me the answer is no.
    I came out to some very old friends they thought my pictures were a lady I was having an affair with until I spelt it out to them .

    Many people don't expect it so they find it hard to believe, OK it is very flattering when people don't know .

  12. #37
    Gold Member Read only Rachael Leigh's Avatar
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    I've always believed nobody would know me unless they interacted with me close up. I don't 100 percent pass but I do look
    just different enough that they might think I look like someone but I think maybe 30 percent chance they would know

  13. #38
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    I do not go out very often, maybe 3 to 6 times a year. i surely hope no one i know recognizes me, as if my brother and sister, and relatives on my late dad's side of the family, and locals found out, my life would be far more difficult, and i would have to move away.

  14. #39
    Silver Member Elizabeth G's Avatar
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    Now I'm not so sure about my earlier statement about being really recognizable. I sort of had the reverse situation happen to me. I was in drab tonight at my favorite consignment boutique when in walked the makeup artist who has done makeovers for me three times, most recently was two days in a row about a week and a half ago. She has never seen me in drab before. She has seen me without makeup but otherwise fully dressed. She walked right past me within two feet and didn't recognize me at all, so maybe I'll do better than I originally thought I would when it eventually happens.

  15. #40
    Silver Member CynthiaD's Avatar
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    i doubt it. This has happened to me, and they never gave me a second glance.

  16. #41
    Aspiring Member ChristinaK's Avatar
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    So, recently I went to group therapy and a strange woman, very attractive, sat down next to me. In the discussion, it was revealed that I am a man. She told me that she thought I had. Better makeup than her and never realized I was a man.

    Fast forward to the next week, different meeting and I'm in man mode. She walks up to me and says she met me the previous week at a meeting. I didn't recognize her, but she recognized me even though I was in man mode! Doh! That really upset me inside, but when I thought about it, my hair was almost the same, I'm 6ft 1in and broad shouldered.

    I think if I had worn a wig I would have been less recognizable, but it has made me feel more vulnerable when out and about.

  17. #42
    Junior Member
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    Yes I am quite sure those who know me as male would recognise me dressed as a woman.

  18. #43
    Crossdresser-At-Large BillieAnneJean's Avatar
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    I was at a club dancing enfemme. A woman I have known for 35 years was dancing just next to me. My SO was dancing about four feet away from me and facing the other direction. They have also known each other for 35 years. We are rather close friends. During a lull in the music my SO and our friend had a conversation that evolved in to laughter. I thought maybe I had been outed so I talked to that friend. She was SHOCKED that she had been dancing next to a 6'2" (in heels) CDer, wearing a color coordinated outfit and hat totally unlike any other woman in the place who were all wearing baggy this n that. AND that it was a CDer and ME! Yes I outed myself.

    The thing is you do a good enough job drawing the focus to what you WANT them to see, and they will see just that. As long as you keep it short. Obviously if you had a conversation or ate a meal with them you couldn't keep up the ruse.

  19. #44
    Member Cherylgyno's Avatar
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    Iris. I am 6'6" 250 lbs. I stick out like a sore thumb in and out of femme. Now I have D cup breasts due to gynecomastia. A sore thumb is invisible next to me.
    Oh and all of my heels are 4-7". As a joke my wife posted a sign on our ceiling fans "Caution low bridge".

  20. #45
    Emerging Diva Nikki A.'s Avatar
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    I remember that I was at a gay club (CD weekend) and ran into two of my daughter's teachers, one that I knew well. I stopped and said hello and he had no idea I was until I threw in some clues. So I guess I do look different

  21. #46
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    The most likely way to get recognised is via your car, dog or partner. If you are alone and on foot most people would recognise someone they know by their hair, clothes, voice or walk and if you have change all four you are likely to be OK. I have been in the presence of people who know me and not rumbled. I think the most likely way to be rumbled is to go to a small function, with fewer than 20 people. First they will notice you are a man and then wonder if they know you and the slightest cue can remind them of someone they know and then they will look for more evidence. I try to avoid such gatherings because of this. On the other hand I have gone out to restaurants knowing a friend or colleague could be at the next table which carries a similar risk. But I now prefer going out and about as Susan far from home - the preference is in the build up rather than the reality - I find that once I am completely dressed I am also completely relaxed in public - it is the thought of going out and getting past the neighbours in bulky outerwear and make-up that I hate, as well as the final transformation in a laybye. Once my wig and lipstick are on and my baggy trousers are off I am flying.

  22. #47
    Reality Check
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    This is a question with no possible answer. Walking down the street, if someone I know walked or drove by, I am confident that they wouldn't recognize me. Sitting in a restaurant eating a meal with them across the aisle for several minutes, there is a possibility that they would eventually recognize me. So, the direct answer is; "It depends."

  23. #48
    Texas gal sherri's Avatar
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    When I was younger I'd say 60/40 odds they wouldn't, maybe even 70/30. Nowadays I'd say 50/50 at best, maybe worse. As others have said, a lot depends on context, circumstances, etc. My outings are always in a nearby city and the chance encounters with acquaintances from home have been in clubs, with only a couple in stores. Some have recognized me, some haven't. One interesting thing I've experienced, people who had only ever seen me as Sherri clocked me immediately the very few times they've seen me in male mode, whereas I think people would have had to study me a moment in a vice versa situation. My SOP rule is if it matters, err on the side of caution. I've had to leave a club or store when I spotted someone I absolutely didn't want to clock me, but that's been rare. Usually if it's a gay person in a gay club I figure our secret is pretty safe.

  24. #49
    Senior Member Tracy Irving's Avatar
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    Assuming I make every effort to blend:

    If they are at my house, I would hope so.
    Seeing me at a store or restaurant, maybe.
    Walking past me at a major sporting event, probably not.

  25. #50
    Stand-up Comedian En Fem❤ Alice_2014_B's Avatar
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    I've been told by friends that know I dress up that they would never recognize me all dolled up.
    One main thing is that I wear glasses 99% of the time as a guy, 1% eye comtacts.
    Those percentages are reversed when in girl-mode.

    Melissa: "... and why are you dressed as a woman?"
    Coach McGuirk: "Because it's freeing."

    -Home Movies
    (cartoon series)

    Shoe size: 9 US women's.
    Dress size: M to L; 8-10.
    Height: 5' 6".

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