Wife found my stash

[Lacey CD]

It really gets me how some of the men here are such babies and afraid of their wives.
I've said it before but my God grow a pair and tell her your happiness matters too and you won't be treated like you don't matter in the relationship.
If she has a hissy fit well so what she will at least respect you for standing up for yourself because its obvious she doesn't respect you right now.

Ah Tracii, staying true to form today are we? Always full of helpful well thought out advice spoken with love! I like your new avatar btw....

[Jenny22]

Angela, what happened in the intervening four years that enabled you to now go out on a regular basis? Maybe the process you and your wife went through could benefit others.

At one time my wife told me that if I ever wore heels (beyond the stockings and panties she knew about) then it would be the final straw.
We are still together four years later and I go out on a regular basis. Most of the time, people are scared of the unknown. It's a lot to take in, have patience.

[Tracii G]

Lacey some may not like the way I word things and may think I am too brash but I have lived thru that situation twice and I know what they are going thru.
I know how men are afraid to make waves in a marriage I totally get that.
If they don't stand up and speak their mind to their wives then its on them.
But I sure don't want to hear them on here complaining about how bad their situation is because its their fault for letting it happen or for it to continue.

[valerie anne]

She found my breast pumps as well

[Tracii G]

Sooo we are a fetish dresser huh?
Thats great one more thing to make it even worse.
Good luck, you are toast at this point.

[Ally 2112]

I have to agree with Tracii G on this one .I basically let my x wife control the situation and called it a compromise it was not .I finally just said i cannot live this way were done .Did it hurt yes, did it cost me money yes, in the end and after a 3 year relationship with a GF i am single and plan on staying that way .for me it just makes sense i will not let someone else control my situation .I do realise this is not for everyone for me it is the only way .I wish you all the best !

[Helen Waite]

You can be certain, if something triggers her suspicions, she will turn the house upside down until she finds something. Then all hell will break loose. I had some nice dresses I found shredded to pieces in the middle of the dining room, and a very enraged wife. Be prepared.

[Stephanie47]

Ally's solution was fine for Ally. I may be viewed sometimes as a Debbie Downer when it comes to some issues. I've always considered any decision I make as having consequences to not only I, but, others too. It's risk vs reward. If you "let" someone take control then that is really not a compromise. What's the wife's viewpoint if the husband is adamant about doing something she does not agree with? It does not have to be cross dressing, does it? If both parties are in total disagreement and cannot arrive an amicable arrangement, then yes of course get a divorce or don't get married at all. Fifty plus percent of marriages fail, and, it's not always cross dressing. If your wife does not want to go in debt for that $150,000 cabin cruiser, then just shed her too.

[Brandy Mathews]

Tiffany,
I am glad that you made it out alive, sounds like. Good luck with everything. She will really be on the prowl from now on though.
Hugs,
Brandy

[SharonDenise]

As I've stated in some of my previous posts on this subject, I came out to my wife before we were married. She accepted and supported my cross dressing activities for the 40 years of our marriage. Unfortunately, she passed several years ago. I've done a little dating and have told some of my dates if I felt that the relationship might continue. Two were okay and one wasn't. I'm not going to give up or hide something that I've been doing all of my life. Thank heaven for a supporting wife.

[Tracii G]

The biggest thing as you will find out its your lying to her and that will hurt the most she will feel betrayed.
I can't say I blame her really.
If you don't tell her everything she will eventually find your other stuff and poo will hit the fan again and the flames will get higher.
Women are nosy almost too nosy for their own good so she will have that house torn apart looking for anything.

[jennifer0918]

I think about this all the time,that day,uffff I think I would have taken the plunge. Come clean and tell her everything, now if she were to tell me she is done then she was never ment to be yes I am lying but I'm not betraying her,? how. I don't know maybe iam a coward who knows . It's only cloths ,c'mon gg's of the world give us a break.

[Tracii G]

Jennifer in your mind you are not betraying her but remember her mind works differently and she may be totally devastated finding out.
She has an image of you as a man not anything else. Crush that image well what could happen?

[5150 Girl]

Hello everyone,
So my wife finally found my pantyhose and panties stash that I have been hiding from her. Luckily I had the rest of my dress up stuff in a different location and she didn't find any of the dresses, heels, wigs and makeup.
Like any wife that finds stuff like that she jumped to conclusions. The first thing she asked me was if I was gay, of course I got upset at that comment and told her it was merely a fetish.
I said something along the lines of are you afraid that the panties could progress into something more. And her reply was if I ever progressed into wanting to try heels and or wearing dresses that she would be out and done. .

If she found the pantyhose she will eventually find the rest!!! In fact, she will probably be on the hunt to see if there is more! Come clean now or you'll be in even more trouble for hiding / lying about what you have. At this point an omission is will equate to a lie
When you do come clean, talk about "full disclosure" and offer a DADT policy. Do not say "hey, I managed to hide it this long," but rather something more like, "This is cross I have carried silently for X years." Another good quote to follow with, "so I'm still the same person, it's just now you know my secrete."