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Thread: The m2f switching dilemma (male ego)

  1. #1
    Junior Member junemay's Avatar
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    Question The m2f switching dilemma (male ego)

    Does your male ego comes into play when being in dress and treated submissive? so far you would have been the alpha male and you are free to do anything and now you dressed and suddenly when someone treats you like a lady(especially in countries like India and Asia) and you are restricted to do certain things and denied entry in someplaces which you go regularly how you take it? or how it will be for you?

  2. #2
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    As I'm not out, and haven't been 'out' while dressed, I cannot really say what it would be like to be limited in activity opportunities because of how I was being treated as a woman. However, I do understand what it's like to be limited in doing, simply because of what I'm wearing when I crossdress at home. When dressed as a guy, I do all sorts of things, from working on a roof, fixing things under the car, taking apart the plumbing in the house, painting walls, re-tiling the bathroom, etc.. None of those will I do when wearing a female outfit. So, when a project comes up that I need to do, I have to decide on whether I want to change into my boy clothes in order to do it. No one else is telling me that I can't do something; but it's essentially the similar feeling, being limited on what I can do, because of who I am.

    Edit: the other thing that limits what I'm doing, is the long wigs that I own. When you have really long hair (oh, mid back length), you have to be real careful of where it swings. I learned a long time ago that when cooking I have to be very careful or my hair will catch fire around the stove, my skirt or dress will catch onto any object protruding into walking spaces, and high heels will make marks into wooden flooring. Girls learn this kind of thing early on. We usually don't.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  3. #3
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    Why do you assume being dressed makes one submissive?
    I certainly am not when I am dressed nor do I have a male ego.

  4. #4
    Aspiring Member SaraLin's Avatar
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    Well - I've pretty much never been an ALPHA male - - - I view myself more as a cooperator or helper.

    I've always liked that saying (Hope I get it right here...)
    Don't follow me, I may not lead.
    Don't lead, I may not follow.
    Rather, walk by my side and be my companion.

    And I find that there are places I can't go, things I can't do while in male mode - such as going the ladies' room or getting cheaper drinks on ladies' night. (laughing gently).

    I can't say anything about foreign countries. Never tried anything over there.


    <added> When I have been out and about and have been treated like a lady, I was on cloud nine! (wa-a-a-a-y to infrequent for me)
    Last edited by SaraLin; 07-04-2017 at 04:56 AM. Reason: added final thought

  5. #5
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    Somethings I do, change when I am dressed, I don't go into male rest rooms. :-)
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  6. #6
    Transgender Person Pat's Avatar
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    I was never an alpha male, since alphas are members of a pack. I don't DO packs -- I was always an independent male. Sort of the human equivalent of a cat. And now I'm an independent trans person. If someone tries to subvert that independence (say, talk over me or try to make decisions for me) they get an attitude correction. On the other hand, if someone is just being polite (opening a door, say) they receive a full-on smile and a sincere thank you.
    I am not a woman; I don't want to be a woman; I don't want to be mistaken for a woman.
    I am not a man; I don't want to be a man; I don't want to be mistaken for a man.
    I am a transgender person. And I'm still figuring out what that means.

  7. #7
    Senior Member phili's Avatar
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    In my experience I have a version of that- I don't ever get 'treated' like a woman- but the parallel is that I can be feeling super fem and wearing a dress, and something will trigger a reaction that is outside of the fem world- perhaps a facility maintenance issue, since that was my profession, and my fem self goes to zero and I am now a masculine man in a dress rather than a feminine man in a dress.

    That said, it doesn't bother me- I've come to accept my fem self as the recreational self [literally= re-create] and I am perfectly happy to wear men's work clothes when doing dirty work, and be my familiar guy self, looking forward to when work is over.
    We are all beautiful...!

  8. #8
    Mannequiniste ! Stacy Darling's Avatar
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    I believe that my male ego is no less strong than my female ego.

    Being sub as a cd is not somewhere i'd like to go, being in Asia hits a nerve as well

    Guess I'm just a fighter!
    STOP, Well I just dance the way I feel
    Stop breathing imagine none of this is real

    Well I just dance the way I feel
    Well I just dance the way I feel
    Well I just dance the way I feel
    "Ou Est Le Swimming Pool"

  9. #9
    I am me! TrishaTX's Avatar
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    when I am dressed ...I am submissive anyway...so I like it.
    No regrets except I should have got dressed & stepped out sooner.

  10. #10
    Gold Member Dana44's Avatar
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    I had the experience of being a girlfriend to a male who wanted me to be feminine. But he said that I was not so feminine. But I did yield to him. Which was feminine to me. and he like me.
    Part Time Girl

  11. #11
    Gold Member Lana Mae's Avatar
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    Not into submission or men! As Pat said I am sort of independent! Hugs Lana Mae
    Life is worth living!
    "Foxy lady! You look so good!!" Jimi Hendrix

  12. #12
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
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    June,
    I can't say I have a switching dilemma, in fact the reverse could be true, I feel more restricted being dressed in male drab.

    I've never had a pass made at me in male mode but it happened recently when dressed ! No I wasn't acting submissive , the only thing I can't stand in either mode is being put down but you don't need to be an alpha person to deal with that .

  13. #13
    Weirdest woman ever! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Interesting thread, JuneMay. When that happened to me years ago, it was a real eye opener!

    I attended an old fashioned, vanilla, open to the public, adult party one Halloween. The point of the gathering was to dance and meet new folks. The event was monthly and rotated around the ballrooms in big hotels in our area. Many of the same folks who like to dance went. As well as singles looking to meet future dates. I went alone and knew no one. Costumes were appropriate attire. With my mask and sexy female presentation, I fooled a number of people that nite. I was asked early on to dance by 3 men. Until my voice gave me away.

    I guess the word got out I was male. That didn't seem to bother a few single GG's there. They adopted me, told me how the event worked, (men asked women to dance, period). So, we ladies hung out together and waited to be asked.

    It struck me how different the other half lives! As women we had to helplessly wait until we attracted men to dance with. Which was all any of us "girls" wanted!

    As we chatted we pretended not to notice, the men circling around. Eyeing us like fresh meat at the market!

    In my 40 years before this dance experience as a man, I danced whenever I wanted with the women I wished to without a second thot!

    Now, the hi heel was on the other foot! It was the first time I had ever been mistaken for and treated as a woman. But, I didn't like it any more than the GG's did!
    Last edited by docrobbysherry; 07-05-2017 at 10:25 PM.
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  14. #14
    Banned Spammer
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    Being dominated by someone ain't going to happen with me and submissive um no thats not happening either.

  15. #15
    Junior Member junemay's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tracii G View Post
    Why do you assume being dressed makes one submissive?
    I certainly am not when I am dressed nor do I have a male ego.

    no I am not saying dressing makes you submissive ,but it certainly restrict you in many ways and the switch from male to female one will experience a lot of difference right?

  16. #16
    Aspiring Member Fiona123's Avatar
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    Let me reframe the question. Would I give up being an alpha male to be able to present as femme? Answer: yes. Would I let go of male privilege? Answer: yes.

    The notion of submissiveness confuses the issue, I would be submissive only in the context of role play. Not in everyday life. Being feminine does not imply submissiveness. If I were to be a submissive woman then I would by definition accept male privilege and alpha male culture.

  17. #17
    Reality Check Krisi's Avatar
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    I believe you are overthinking things. Get dressed, go out, enjoy yourself. Don't try to analyze it.

  18. #18
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    I wouldn't say being dressed makes me feel sub
    missive , but as has been said the rules for girls and boys are somewhat
    different . There are many strong women role models out there .

    Jean Ann

  19. #19
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    Who says you have to be submissive en femme? I'm not so I guess I'm basically an
    "alpha female" dressed up. Works for me anyway.
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

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