Wow

[Emma Beth]

I can't believe how much has happened in the past few weeks. Let alone since I started Hormones almost a year ago.

I've made a lot of progress with my voice.

I'm getting Ma'amed a lot more.

I'm really finding my personal style.

I just got my first heels today.

I wore them for a couple of hours and learned a ton in that time like...

1. I can walk on tile and wood floors.
2. I can walk well on carpet.
3. I can walk down and up stairs.
4. I can walk in the grass. I took my dog out while I was wearing my new boots and learned this very quickly.
5. I can ride my Motorcycle in them and have better control of shifting and breaking in them.

I can't believe that it has been almost a year on Hormones.

I now wear contacts and I'm able to show off the blueness of my eyes a lot easier as a result.

I've toughed it out at work and I am now a lot more stress free. I would still love to Transition at work. But it doesn't look like I will be able to. Unfortunately that is a part of my life that I will just have to be patient for.

All that is just within the past couple of weeks. I don't even wanna try to list everything before that to the point I started Hormones.

Love'
Emma

P.S. I thought I would include a pic of my new cute boots. They are mid calf Motorcycle boots with 2.5" heels. Not bad for my first set of heels. LOL, when I first got them out of the packaging, I looked at them and thought I would never get my HUGE feet into these things. I'm very glad I was wrong.

My new boots.jpg

[LeannS]

Emma
That is great that your finding your groove and keep improving your doing great!!!!
What kind of training are you doing for your voice??

Leann

[Emma Beth]

LOL.

Practice practice Practice, Leann.

I found tips here and there on the internet and I have been incorporating them into what I do. I kind of tried things to see what worked for me. What works for me is what I found to be the easiest thing to do out of all the tips I have found.

The biggest thing I have been working on is removing resonance from my voice more than anything. It seems that tone naturally follows into the Feminine range for me when I do that.

What I do the most for practice, that has been a huge help, is I will pick up a book or a story I have on my computer and read it out loud.

I was reading a portion of a project I've been working on to my GF in New York and she was amazed at my progress, not to mention my talent for writing erotica/romance, while I read to her.

Doing it that way helps me to relax into it and let it just happen as naturally as I can.

Just like learning to walk in heels like I have been doing over the past 24 hours. I took my dog out for his morning walk in my new heels and noticed that the more I relaxed into what I was doing, the more natural it became.

[Sara Jessica]

That has to be a bonafide first, hormones before learning to walk in heels.

[Emma Beth]

Well, walking in heels seems to come naturally to me.

I have such big feet that it's hard to find affordable heels in my size.

However, I have a heavy heart over my new boots.

I had an appointment with the podiatrist as a followup for an issue I had about two months ago.

I was informed that I need to avoid wearing heels as much as possible and only wear FLATS. I can wear heels, but only if I'm not doing a lot of walking in them.

With that many restrictions for heels, I feel like crying.

So, maybe I'll just hop into my onsie and curl up with some chocolate ice cream or something. Maybe even go get me some Sin in a Tin chocolate pate before getting into my onsie.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

omg please stop with the high heels..

I havent worn high heels in years and trust me, my transition has been fine without them

[Jeri Ann]

I'm with Kaitlyn on this one. The last time I wore heels it was because Lauri K threatened to beat me up if I didn't.

Doing life doesn't require heels in my world. In fall and winter my choice of footwear is boots with leggings or jeans.

In summer and spring I wear sandals, flip flops or casual shoes, Sperry's or Toms.

Now, that being said, there is a very special date in the future that will require my most provocative and alluring dress and heels. Just sayin'

[jentay1367]

Just clothes...wear what you like, like what you wear. Though I'm always curious about the transitioner who's world seems to be focused on attire. Particularly, exclusively feminine attire.

[Jeri Ann]

Attire comes in handy when you leave the house.

[LeaP]

omg please stop with the high heels..

LOL! I have no use for them. Don't like them and never did.

[Mirya]

I think I would wear heels more often if I was shorter. Shoes with heels are pretty. But I'm 5' 7" and I don't want to stand out by being even taller, so I pretty much never wear heels. In fact I can count on one hand the number of times I've worn heels in the last 1.5 years, and even then I only wore them to trans events.

Only 5% of American women are 5' 9" or taller. If you're already tall, and you want to blend in, you may want to reconsider wearing shoes that add to your height.

[Jenna Stunned]

That has to be a bonafide first, hormones before learning to walk in heels.

He, he, This was the first thing I thought of too. I know heels have nothing to do with transition, Or being a woman in anyway, But I sure did experiment with them before deciding on transition. A lot!!!


Good for you Hun, Sounds like its been a good year, Hope there are many more in your future. I like the reading idea to practice your girl voice, Mine needs a lot of work.

[Emma Beth]

As far as the heels thing goes. I have been wanting a pair for a long time, just because I've wanted some.

The more I looked, the more it was looking like I would have to spend more on them than I have ever paid on any item of attire, ever.

$200 or more for custom shoes. Then I FINALLY acquire an affordable pair and then get that news 24 hours later.

On the bright side. That pair of boots will last me for YEARS to come.

[valerieg]

May I ask where you got the boots and how big they go? I'm in the "more is not better" foot club and haven't stumbled upon any good motorcycle boots in my size.

[Rianna Humble]

Let's get this thread back on track. This is about Emma Beth's experiences and a little side line into some cute boots she bought.

Please don't attempt to drag it off topic by criticising her for something she never said, and especially please don't attempt to make this into "what defines a woman". If you are TS and want to debate that, go ahead and start your own thread, otherwise just leave it out.

[OCCarly]

I think I would wear heels more often if I was shorter. Shoes with heels are pretty. But I'm 5' 7" and I don't want to stand out by being even taller, so I pretty much never wear heels. In fact I can count on one hand the number of times I've worn heels in the last 1.5 years, and even then I only wore them to trans events.

Only 5% of American women are 5' 9" or taller. If you're already tall, and you want to blend in, you may want to reconsider wearing shoes that add to your height.

I'm 5'7" and I have no problems wearing heels up to four inches or so. I typically favor two inch heels on my casual sandals. But there are a lot of tall girls in Cali. I've never been the tallest girl in the place wherever I go.

Gal Godot is 5'10." If you got it, rock it.

[Mirya]

I've toughed it out at work and I am now a lot more stress free. I would still love to Transition at work. But it doesn't look like I will be able to. Unfortunately that is a part of my life that I will just have to be patient for.

May I ask why you believe you won't be able to transition at work? Have you brought it up to management or human resources?

[RADER]

That is good news, I wish you the best of luck at work.
Rader

[AlyssaJ]

How about this, wear whatever shoes you enjoy wearing and quit worrying about how tall or short other women are, what other women wear, etc. Yes there is a definite desire most of us have to blend and there are ways to do that. Certainly the more things you do to make yourself stand out the more likely you're going to get clocked. But that said, aren't most of us transitioning because we've put on an act for years and just want to be ourselves? So why put on an act trying to be a woman that isn't your true self just for the sake of blending? Screw that noise, I say do what you enjoy and what makes you happy. Life is too short to be governed by the rules of how to blend or conform to some image of how a woman should look. If you're ok with doing what others say you need to do, you should have skipped transition in the first place IMHO.

With all that, I will say I know a few women over 5'10" and each of them has no problems wearing heels and looking killer in them. There's a woman at my church has to be at least 6'2", she wears heels quite often and is absolutely stunning.

Sorry, rant over.

Oh and for the record, those boots are gorgeous Emma Beth. Sorry to hear of the news your doctor delivered. Sounds like you're doing a great job being true to yourself in your transition and taking the path that works best for you. That's so important. I'm so happy to read of all the great progress your making and I hope you're able to get to the point of workplace transition soon.

[Starling]

Podiatrists always say don't wear heels, Emma Beth, and I'm sure that's the ideal for most women. I will say this: I have a back problem which is supposedly exacerbated by wearing heels, but I find it less painful to walk in moderately high heels than flats. So I don't go hog wild, but I do wear heels when I feel like it. I seem to be easier to fit in heels than flats. If a pair of flats are wide enough, they usually slip off my heels, and I do not like having to grip them with my toes, as it can lead to hammertoes. Best all-around is to vary heel height, I think.

Lallie

[Mirya]

I've thought about this some more, and I think Alyssa brought up a good perspective. The key may be to wear whatever gives you the most confidence in yourself. If wearing heels makes you feel good about yourself and gives you that confidence, then rock those heels!

For me, I realized that I usually don't enjoy wearing really girly stuff so I almost never wear heels, skirts, or dresses. Most of the time they don't make me feel good. But earlier in my transition, and especially before going full-time, I definitely tried out a lot of very feminine clothing. It took me a while to develop and understand my own personal style, which I'd describe as "casual chic".

So feel free to experiment and figure out what you enjoy wearing. Wear whatever gives you confidence at the time! And hang around people who inspire confidence in you, as that's always important, but especially so in the early stages of transition.

[AlyssaJ]

Mirya, you bring up a really good point about the confidence factor. I could definitely see where the confidence gained by feeling free, sexy, whatever in your clothing of choice could have more of an impact on your ability to blend whatever amount of image issues are created by the extra height.

[Emma Beth]

Myra, the issues where I work have a lot to do with some of the policies that prevent me from transitioning properly due to finances.

Here's the crux of my problem.

1. I can't use the Women's bathroom and properly transition at work until I have the Female designation on my birth certificate and drivers licence.
2. Because I was born in the State of Michigan, I can't get that changed until I have SRS.
3. At work, any procedure to change my body to feel congruent is specifically excluded on my insurance.
4. To save up for SRS to pay out of pocket, it will take quite a WHILE.
5. The store Manager is not a nice person and creates the most hostile work environment I have ever dealt with.

It is nice at work when I have customers use Ma'am instead of Sir when they talk with me. I am getting that more and more at work.

So, for now I can live with living as the woman I am outside of work. Simply because I know this will not be forever and it looks like things will be changing for the better sometime within the next one to two years.

[Starling]

I know we have a federal, not national, government like the UK; but certain rights should be guaranteed no matter what state you live in or come from. Emma Beth, I'm so sorry you are faced with not one, but at least two Catch-22s. You obviously have the strength to cope with this mess, but it shouldn't happen to anyone in the 21st century.

Lallie

[Georgette_USA]

Lallie

Do you honestly think the US Federal government would be good or bad from the Congress and Senate and President (and his advisors) right now. They can't even pass any significant legislation right now.

They are working on not only driving TG in hiding, but also to allow open discrimination to all LGBT.

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Emma

I feel for your frustrations. This is from the mid 70s. Luckily my time from coming out at work to work as female was only 4-5 and to SRS was only 8-9 months.

I had the same restrictions on number 1,3,4 prior to SRS. I was able to get some relief on 1 once I had an actual date setup for SRS. I was able to get my BC changed after SRS and could fix 1 after that. After SRS I was able to get 50% of my surgeries back paid by the Psychiatric part of my insurance. Plus it would continue for any future costs like HRT.