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Thread: Just some comments.

  1. #1
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    Just some comments.

    There have been continual changes in western societies . The sexual revolution of the 1960's was huge!!! I remember the miniskirts, hot pants. and hippie era. I was never one, was pretty conservative then, and still am in some ways , but i remember in 1971, at my small Illinois town high school, the girls were first allowed to wear pants , in my junior year. I had started my first dressing up i my mom's and sister's things about then. I believe women were greatly sexualized , in the years they wore dresses, skirts, and miniskirts, and that era. Songs were almost all about love and sex. To me, after wards, there was the big feminist movement in revolt of women being so sexualized. The wearing of pants exploded, and has never stopped, so that today, seeing a Gg, in a dress is the rarer thing. In the area i live in, a dress and hose is not even a weekly sighting!! Unless, maybe some women leaving a church, but even there, many are wearing slacks. The number of crossdressers seems to be skyrocketing some now. I believe many GGs of the baby boom, now wearing very short haircuts, and jeans, sweatshirts, and dull, drab clothes, sneakers, is because many do not want to be beautiful anymore, and refuse to wear dresses, skirts, hose and dressy shoes, because they do not want male attention, anymore, and are also more comfortable in drab, boring clothes. Many GG's are burned out on too much male attention, and do not want to attract any, now. At the same time, so many of us men, are STARVED for female attention. We do not always know why we have such strong desire to look pretty, or beautiful , and dress up as ladies. There are many reasons no doubt. But, part of it, may be, there are so many GG's that no longer want to look sexy, or pretty to men, that we are taking up the deficit! Just sharing my thoughts on the matter. Any comments?
    IT TAKES A REAL DRESS TO WEAR A MAN.

  2. #2
    Silver Member ClosetED's Avatar
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    Interesting perspective, but I think the CDers are not more common, but more willing to peek out of the closet. And if men are more starved for pretty women, in the era of the obesity epidemic, there are still porn magazines as well as some upscale businesses where women do dress well. I don't think the "normal men" are dressing themselves up to make up for fewer pretty women. My 2 cents
    Hugs, Ellen

  3. #3
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    Close Ed, I agree about upscale businesses. I live in a small town midwest area, and i got a chance to visit Chicago last week, and i could not believe the MANY lovely GG's and dresses, skirts, hose and heels!!! It was like an oasis in Death Valley for this small towner!!!!!! When i had to come back to Dullsville, it was Death Valley for the eyes, again.
    IT TAKES A REAL DRESS TO WEAR A MAN.

  4. #4
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    I just like looking nice en femme my friend. No other reason for myself really.
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

  5. #5
    Gold Member Dana44's Avatar
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    I would really worry about it. We are who we are and how we dress is our reflection and for no other reason. Sometimes when we are out, perhaps a woman will look at us and say, hey I can wear a skirt too. then more women are out like that. Yeah right....
    Part Time Girl

  6. #6
    Silver Member ClosetED's Avatar
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    Alice - I work in a company with about 3/4 women. Probably half dress 'Dullsville', another 40% dress decent with dresses, and the 10% who look fabulous/stylish/power dressers. A rare person who dresses too provocatively.
    I live near Boston - so bigger cities likely have the culture where women feel a need to dress more "professional"
    Hugs, Ellen

  7. #7
    Member SuzyZahn's Avatar
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    WOW,,,Brings back memories! I remember in JR High,,,,not gonna date self,,,girls wore mini skirts with stockings and garter belts,,,,so sexy,,,got my attention,,loved it,,then the Disco era happened later,,,,such fem sexy attire,heels,,hose,skirts,,etc,,,such femininity,,then the late nineties?,,feminism?,,,slacks,dullsville,anti woman almost,,,sad! Luckily i remember the true feminine years and relate with it.

  8. #8
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    Women no longer have to beautify themselves to attract and snare a potential
    well-off breadwinner. They are breadwinners themselves now, and men's equals, as well as competitors. And they don't need the male attention.

    Some of us remember the airlines in the sixties advertising their stewardesses: "Hi, I'm Mary. Fly me." I for one am glad the old sexist days are over.

    Ineke

  9. #9
    Member leannejacobs's Avatar
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    Alice I tend to agree somewhat, although I wouldn't admit this to my wife, she accuses me of dressing the way that I think a woman should look and how I would like to see her dress, not in a bad way but it's how she felt in the beginning.

    To a degree she was right but I persuaded her otherwise as she had put on a lot of weight and couldn't compete with my figure, sorry that sounds bad but it was to spare her feelings. She's down to a uk size 12 now and looking great, we often get dressed up together for fun.

  10. #10
    Gold Member Lana Mae's Avatar
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    We got the female students able to wear pants in 1969! I am very in favor of women's lib but it has been at the cost of tight knit families! Mother's used to stay home to take care of the kids. Then they went to work and the kids went to daycare! Not sure this was such a good idea as I am seeing too many who do not have core values that were taught at home! Like when you use the last of something replace it! Like paper towels at the sink at work! Some one will use the last one and go on without replacing it! Common courtesy is often lacking! More CD/TG are coming out than before as the level of acceptance is higher than in the 50's! Women are wearing dresses and skirts here on an almost daily basis if you look about a bit! I even see some heels now and then! LOL Hugs Lana Mae
    Life is worth living!
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  11. #11
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    Thanks all for the posts! Lana, Speaking of common courtesy! Today, i had to go to the dentist to have my temp crown glued back in, and in the entrance to the parking lot, two cars were blocking the entrance, holding up traffic!! In the blocking cars, were women jabbering to each other. This went on for over five minutes!!. A person in a car that was blocked form leaving began to lose her cool, and patience! And started tooting the horn. The two women just ignored it, and kept talking, blocking the entrance for over five minutes. Othe people were getting upset, too. i could not belleive what i was seeing!!! It was not car problems. Just talking from one car to another!!! Suzie, I remember my late grade, and high school years, and how pretty so many girls dressed then! M ade it worth the effort to get up and go to school, some!! Lana, i would guess in the south, more women wear dresses, and skirts yet. In the big cities, there are far more GG's and far more dress up there. In farm country, corn belt small towns, not many seem be wanting to dress up at all. I dress up for a number of reasons occasionally, but not every day. I dress up to resemble the typpe of woman i am attracted to most, and also because the sensual clothes are so thrilling to wear, and feel so wow! And also, to see what i look like if i had been a GG, and also because i have never had a steady girfriend nor wife, and I am lonesome for the female energy, and form, soe i make myself into her for a short time.
    Last edited by Alice Torn; 07-26-2017 at 06:46 PM.
    IT TAKES A REAL DRESS TO WEAR A MAN.

  12. #12
    Senior Member Melissa Rose's Avatar
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    As a few have expressed, I am also very happy that many of the sexist expectations and standards placed on women are gone or fading including those about appearance, femininity and lady-like behavior. The more casual wear is a reflection of the greater social and cultural freedoms women today hold (even though there is more progress to be made and a discussion for another place and time).

    Women do not need to dress up in dresses, heels and makeup to be beautiful. Beauty comes mostly from within and not from mainly what you are wearing. Nowadays most women dress for comfort and convenience, and not to please the men of the world. And this is the way it should be. Sure, some dress sloppy but so do a lot of guys. If anyone is going to call out women for not "dressing up" as much as in the past or for being too casual or sloppy, be an equal opportunity judge and jury and do the same for the men. Men do not get a pass because they are men.

    I have worked for the past 4 years in several office environments with exclusively women (and in case anyone is wondering, yes, as a woman) and each had a different clothes culture even though all were non-profits. The first was the most casual with dress pants being the overwhelming norm. The next was a bit more dressy with dresses and skirts being a little more common but still an exception. At my current job, everyone tends to be more fashion oriented so dresses and skirts are a lot more common. During the hot summer months, I wear a lot of light, summer dresses and sandals for comfort reasons and not to meet a fashion expectation. During the winter months, it is almost exclusively pants for the same reason - comfort. What I plan on doing that day at work and after work also dictates what I wear especially my shoes. Again, it is about comfort and convenience. We mainly dress to please ourselves and not to be beautiful to others, attract attention or be eye candy. It is great to have a wide range of our own choices and not be restricted to a narrow definition dictated by others.

  13. #13
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    I was in high school in the early 1990s and by then it was all pants all the time. Girls only wore skirts and dresses when they had to dress up for an away game at another school (I never understood why they had to do that, but it made for a few pleasant memories of high school.) I remember one girl one day who chose to wear a mid length skirt and opaque tights and was asked during the day by other girls why she is wearing that when she doesn't have to, like she had gone mad or something (she said it was too cold for shorts but too warm for pants and she wanted to wear something different... good answer!) Some of my teachers were older and dressed very nicely and wore skirts, dresses and hosiery. I don't think it is a coincidence they made a powerful impression on me.

  14. #14
    Senior Member Tracy Irving's Avatar
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    A decent restaurant near my house has a free taco building station in the bar during happy hour. Yesterday, before my son and I left, the place was full. This is not a super high end classy place. Most of the women were wearing a skirt or dress. It did not go unnoticed.

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    I don't think it's as bad as GG's no longer want to look sexy, or pretty to men. Go out to the mall There are plenty of 20 something GG's looking hot in cute little dresses.

    Besides lots of GG's look very sexy in jeans and a top.

    Oh yeah as for the "to men" part.

    I am going to say this one more time. I am not attracted to men and I DO NOT DRESS AS A WOMAN TO ATTRACT MEN!!!

  16. #16
    New Member Viggy's Avatar
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    Hi Alice,
    this is an aspect I wondered too. My wife is not slim, so she doesn't like to wear skirt and hose or heels since many years. I think it's one big reason but not the only one, why i started CDing.

  17. #17
    Silver Member CynthiaD's Avatar
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    What you say is true of older women. They tend to dress mostly in pants of some sort. But recently I've seen a lot of 20-something women wearing attractive female clothing in day to day situations: skirts, dresses, and so forth. I interpret this as the final victory for women's liberation. It is no longer necessary for women to assert their equality with drab clothing. Equality is now just assumed, and women are comfortable looking attractive without the fear of not being taken seriously. But this is just my opinion.

  18. #18
    Platinum Member kimdl93's Avatar
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    I'm apparently a couple years older than Alice, but I still have memories of the standards of dress from the 60's for both women and girls, and the shift of the early 70's. I don't think it was so much a revolt as the maturation and modernization of society. As early as the 1920s, women began to shake off the very limiting roles and costumes imposed upon them by culture. WWII really was the revolution - when women began to play a crucial role in war production. Once the genie was out of the bag, it was hard to expect women to return to their pre-war roles and limitations. After that, a variety of cultural shifts intermingled and accelerated. Remember Mary Tyler Moore wearing capris on the Dick Van Dyke Show, a comedy that really revolutionized sicom families? Or was it simply reflecting the accelerating evolution?

    Eight years later, it was the Mary Tyler Moore show that again reflected the change in culture. A mature woman, living independently and NOT living for the chance to marry again. And not confined to dresses.

    But even the women still playing apparently conventional roles welcomed more freedom in dress. Almost all the farm women of my mother's generation eagerly swapped house dresses for tops and slack, both for everyday and dressier occasions.

    I'd dispute the idea that it was a revolt against being sexualized. Women, young and old still wanted to look good, they just had an much expanded variety of ways of expressing their individuality and to the degree of their own choosing, theiir sexuality.

    I do not miss the narrow, restrictive and in many ways demeaning conceptions of women that had diminished, but persisted, even to this day. I really admire and celebrate women of all ages who more freely pursue their ambitions, dreams and interests without such archaic constraints.

  19. #19
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    I can only say, that in the smaller town Illinois area i live in, a GG in a dress or skirt, is a rare sighting!! In chicago, when i was there last week, a different story!! Probably lots of high end office ladies strutting their power dresses, skirt suits, heels!
    IT TAKES A REAL DRESS TO WEAR A MAN.

  20. #20
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ineke Vashon View Post
    Women no longer have to beautify themselves to attract and snare a potential well-off breadwinner. They are breadwinners themselves now, and men's equals, as well as competitors. And they don't need the male attention.
    Don't kid yourself. Younger women still want a mate, and are competitive as heck for 'a good man'. I have an office park a few miles away, where I routinely go for lunch a couple of times a week. Sitting on one of the benches after lunch (or, sometimes having lunch on it), I get to girl-watch all the pretty young women coming and going from their offices to the restaurants for their lunch. And there are LOTS of twenty something women in dresses and skirts, well, in the warmer weather, at least.
    What you don't find, is the middle aged group going out of their way to be attractive: You have basically two groups; the ones who are divorced and angry about wasting their life on their ex husband, and even angrier that they can't compete with women who are 10 to 15 years younger than they are; and the ones who never got married, who are angry because 'their prince' never showed up to sweep them off their feet and marry them into the suburban nuclear family that they grew up believing was their birthright. Basically most unattached middle aged women are just plain angry all the time, at somebody. And it's almost always a man who is the target of her wrath.
    Then you have the senior citizens, who don't give a crap how they look.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  21. #21
    Ice queen Lorileah's Avatar
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    Seems your definition of beautiful ;leans toward subservient eye candy. Why must a woman wear a dress to be "beautiful"? This group amazes me in their intolerance while demanding acceptance. Let's twist this a bit: Why do you (As men who like to look "beautiful") not wear nicely cut male clothing that women will find attractive? Maybe shave more frequently. Moisturize your hands and skin, especially of your job is manual labor? Why, don't you, (as men) do things to make yourself more attractive to the women you desire to accept you? Why don't you wear a tie. You know 60 years ago every man who went out to dinner wore a coat and tie. You don't see that anymore. I guess men just don't want to be handsome. They want to look all sloppy.

    You guys (yes I said guys because those of you who still think a woman should fit a role are thinking with something beside your brain) are a piece of work. You know if you were a REAL man you'd stand up for the right to dress like a woman instead of complaining that women don't dress to please you
    The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
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    “Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,

  22. #22
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    Lorileah,
    Been there and done that, I always wore a tie and jacket for my business, always a suit for covering my weddings . I always take a selection of ties on holiday only to find I'm the only one wearing one.

    As for applying various cosmetic items, for a long time it was a fear of giving the game away , any suggestion of using something feminine was a complete NO NO !! When people said I had tough working hands it felt reassuring, they thought I was all male . It was so good to walk aya from all that, but it does go with dressing , not with drab mode . It is hard to understand in that context why women appear to shun being feminine at times, why would they want to do that when it's mostly all we can think about ?

    I wouldn't call it an intolerance it's hard to understand and maybe a little envious . We know what it takes to be beautiful or attempt it , it does feel unfair women can do it on a daily basis if they chose but we have so many fears over even attempting at times , don't blame us blame the society we live in , they invoke the irrational fears in our heads.

  23. #23
    Member Mirya's Avatar
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    Thank you Lorileah for saying what needed to be said.

    I'd also like to add that just because a woman is wearing a casual outfit doesn't mean she can't look beautiful. For example, the woman in this picture is not wearing a skirt, or dress, or hose, or heels. But she still looks really beautiful, right?

    casual street chic.jpg

  24. #24
    Member Lea's Avatar
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    What I have noticed is the over all decline in dressing nice to go out for men and women.

    The people I see going out shopping in the pg.'s and slippers is amazing.

    The women I will not forget was in a mall shopping on a Saturday afternoon. She was wearing the old style grey sweatshirt and grey workout pants. Something looked out of place and as I got closer I realized she was wearing them inside out and backwards.

    The worse I saw for a man was in a fast food establishment. He was a heavy set man and the t shirt he was wearing only covered to his belly button. When he walked up to the counter to get a refill on his drink his uncovered belly flopped onto the counter.

    If a person just cleans up and look presentable with clean outfits means so much.

    I like to watch women who are dressed nicely. That could be from a nice dress to the picture of the lady that Miyra posted.

  25. #25
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    when I go out, one of the things I like to do is people watch, I just like looking at the different types of clothes that people wear and imagine how some of the things will look on me and just generally admire other people. One of the things I have noticed is that more and more people are dressing for comfort and practicality, I think this is why you see a lot of women making the switch to jeans. I also feel that a woman wearing the right pair of nice jeans with a nice top can be just as sexy as one wearing a nice dress. I know when I go out (even though I love the feel of a dress or skirt swishing around my legs when I walk) I don't wear a dress that often I more go towards the jeans end ( I own about 10 pairs of jeans in different styles from jeggings to skinny to boyfriend cut) simply for the comfort. I also think the way a women dresses depends on the occasion, A sensible skirt and low heels or flats for work, the jeans for relaxing time and then if going out for a night on the town with some friends or SO then dressing to the nines. I can remember going sopping with my ex- wife and going into different stores with her and looking at clothes and she would comment how much she likes an outfit but would not buy it because it is not practical, plus clothes are so dam expensive now that a person wants to be able to get as much use out of them as possible for the money being paid. I was in the store last week looking at some fall lines coming out and I saw this very cute dress that I wouldn't mind purchasing I tried it on and it looked great, then I looked at the price tag, I am glad I took my heart pills that morning or else I would have had another heart attack. It was well over the $100 mark, and lets face it, with the economy how its been the last few years people just have don't as much disposable income to spend on expensive clothes either, so that could be another reason for the way women are dressing too.
    Last edited by Stephanie Nicole; 07-29-2017 at 07:06 AM.

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