It's great that you are going to live the life you want and on your terms. It may take time to get there but the rewards will be fantastic.
It's great that you are going to live the life you want and on your terms. It may take time to get there but the rewards will be fantastic.
Teresa I wish you all the best and by all means do what makes you happy.
Keep your eyes open to any monkey business from the ex is all I'm saying.
Hi Teresa
It all sounds a little odd, but you have dealt with a lot so far and I am sure you will sort it out and move on. Good luck whatever occurs.
Vikky
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Adventure before dementia
As you have made such a big decision my advice would be to focus on yourself and doing everything possible to ensure your happiness and mental stability. Whatever your sister-in-law decides to do or not is up to her. She now has to fit in with the pattern of your life and not the other way around.
I have followed your lengthy journey and I wish you every happiness.
Teresa, I say so what if your SIL drops in and your dressed. She maybe curious she maybe spying she may be anything so what? its not like she is going to see anything she doesn't know about. Maybe she is confirming that is the real reason why you have moved out?
A.K.A Rebecca & Bec
Becky, and others ,
All summed up in one word , " Curiosity !!"
I was going to say she has never seen a CDer before, but I recall she has visited the Far East and seen the Ladyboys, I'm wondering if she truly wishes to see me to make a comparison. I can't say if she would know the differences in the lifestyles , so maybe she is looking for an opportunity to talk to me about it all. I do think she is going to get a surprise when she does see me, as many have. OK going back to the MIAD question , I feel that is what she is expecting ,then she could go back and say I do look stupid rather than say he does look fairly convincing.
Vikky,
I have the feeling they accept the reason for making the break but they don't really want to see me go , maybe we are back to question of losing control over me !
I know they have concerns over me managing financially , both keep offering me little jobs like doing their gardens for them, I know I will need to supplement my pensions with extra money .
Teresa,Tell them that you are hoping to work at an adult book store and perhaps do fetish photography on the side.
Teresa, The paramount thing in all of this is your happiness. You have made your decision and a very wise one indeed. This is your life, your future and a chance to make the happiness and peace of mind that you have searched for so many years and now it is here just for you.
Lots of us have wished you every happiness and me included. You will find happiness and peace, yes it may be a long journey for you but knowing you as I do you will get there.
As for your SIL sure she will be curious but one thing for sure she will certainly not see a MIAD in fact after initial surprise she might not even recognise you unless she has seen a photo of you.
I see no future problems from that angle because she will not see anything that is not already known by your wife to be later used against you.
You will have a good life in the future, it is out there just for you, all for your taking.
You are doing well and I wish from the bottom of my heart every happiness for you, now and for the future.
Pretty much how I'm seeing it, Teresa. If the SIL doesn't think dressing is something you should be doing, why would she just 'pop round' like a best mate? Remember, "Hell hath no fury like a woman with corns"...or something like that.Originally Posted by Tracii G
Good for you Miss. Sincere best wishes on your new life and really happy future.
Becky
Last edited by reb.femme; 08-18-2017 at 05:02 PM.
Rogina,
You've obviously found my box in the small ads column !!
Becky( UK),
Thanks for kind wishes , I'm wondering if my SIL will start offering me some of her clothes when she sees me rather than my wife, now that could be an interesting scenario !
Bobbi,
Thanks for your lovely comments, maybe you might change your mind if we meet up next year, Carole is all for it.
Teresa, you need to do what is best for you at this stage of the game. Actually, it's not a game, is it? If your desire is to be totally free to express yourself, then just do it 100% of the time. If your wife or your sister-in-law drops over unexpected, please just look presentable. If they do not like the look, then they'll not come around too often. Don't do any of this "please call before you come" nonsense so you can present as a man. "Please call before you come" so you can fix your makeup and put on a pretty dress. And, be sure to serve them tea.
Stephanie,
That is how I intend to pitch it, unless they catch me out checking out a new outfit, I intend to present in a acceptable way , that is also because I may be seen by neighbours . Besides I won't be prancing around the house as if it were some hobby as some put it, I will have day to day jobs to do and will also have to do my own shopping .
As Marcelle worded it will be a social transition , I know it's going to take some courage at times.
Hi Teresa,
I read your post a few days ago and some going others back months when I was a lurker.
My thoughts are a little outside the box thinking maybe.
I think your sister in law likes to tease your ex -SO. Unless a woman has been hiding under a rock they all know there are men out there that like to dress up. So the comment about men don't dress up sounds like tongue in cheek. SIL then says She will drop by to see you is most likely because She has seen it before " I see now this might be true, you mentioned Asia and Lady Boys farther into this post".
What worries me is if you are seen dressed up for the first time and it's your SIL and not your wife, there could be a huge jealousy backlash. So if your wife has never even seen a picture of you dressed and you plan on presenting to your SIL, you might want to at least offer to send pics to your wife to see before anyone else sees you.
I was hesitant on giving an opinion since I most likely dont have all the details down from your past history. So if I am way off please ignore all of this.
Good luck, you are beautiful and Brave.
Teresa, I would not worry too much about your SIL dropping in, Treat her well and when she talks to your wife. She will not be able to say much except you are as you and happy yourself. It is a social transition and just be the girl you are. Fine times ahead is waiting for you.
Part Time Girl
SmanthaToday's comment says up so much "You are beautiful and brave". yes for sure, there's absolutely no doubt about anything you WILL do it and succeed. Once you have moved into your new place things will look and feel much easier to achieve than thinking about them outside of the equation. As I have said before, did I? your life will be yours to do as you please. Your SILl visiting without contacting first is no hurdle to leap over at all! I feel that she must know you dress and although she may not have seen a picture of you before that is no reason not to be yourself and dressed whenever she may call. Any misconceptions that she may have of a MIAD will without doubt be rapidly dispelled at the precise moment you open the door and present yourself as you have done in previous posted photos of yourself. She may even think she has called at the wrong house! when presented with, how can I put it? oh yes "A thing of beauty". For the simple reason that presentation is all that our life is about presenting as we feel we should. I am sure in my heart you will not have a problem whatsoever in this respect.
Also there are no skeletons in the cupboard to be let out. You have been open and frank to your wife, things did not work out and now its your turn to be number one. This is your life to be now, nobody to criticise or be snide to you.
You will find such a new type of freedom especially as wherever you will be you will be dressing everyday and presenting as a beautiful woman, your new neighbours will have no problem as mine have not been on those times when they have seen me dressed. So another reason not be worried about what people may think. Things are changing for the better all the time and to a degree homophobia is on the back foot quite a lot lately.
With all our support you will have a smooth transition from married life to being able paint the town red!
Talking of which, regarding the scarlet bed sheets (Fact) you will have to fight Carole for the bed or both sleep in it at the same time! LoL
[SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]
"I know its going to take some courage at times"
Yes and no, quite possibly but you have shown us all what can be achieved in so many ways and successfully at that as well so courage in a way may not be the chosen word to use determination is also how I would put and I think you have plenty of that.
Go for it girl!
Samantha,
They are all from farming families so her comment about men not doing such things is a down to earth comment, no she doesn't tease she is just very curious and likes to know every ones business , she can be very helpful and supporting and I think this has more to do with the issue. It maybe an interesting point you raise about seeing me before my wife , I can't say how that one would pan out, as far as showing my wife pictures I'm inclined to let them sort the problem out between themselves , they have the problem with my appearance not me .
Not sure if you and Bobbi are right about being beautiful and brave , but I'm very flattered by the comment many thanks or that.
Bobbi,
Carole and I have never fought over a bed yet, I'm sure we'll come to some arrangement without upsetting a kind host .
Dana,
That is I hope will happen, treat her OK as I usually do , and give her no room to find fault .
OF course Samantha and me are right about the beauty and bravery bit. It is one thing for a marriage to break down, separate and whatever follows but quite another thing to include such an emotive subject as dressing which is the core of all of this and therefore the bravery comes in with your inner strength to break out and find what will ultimately give you the happiness you so dearly need and in so doing to be able to lead the life that you strive to have.
You are the inspiration for so many others who might just be in the same position as you but without knowing how to solve it amicably which seems to be what you are achieving. It takes guts to leave a situation after whatever how many years. I admire you for your strength
Posting Permissions
