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Thread: Update on Marriage

  1. #26
    Queen of Chinatown jennifer0918's Avatar
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    Total eclipse of the heart

  2. #27
    Banned Spammer
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    Maybe thats the problem over analyzing? there are some things sounds not quite up to par. But you know what it is your life and how you want to live your life. The wonderful women on here have been thru more than what they say at times. Some know whats what and some are here to try and figure out why they love wearing womens clothes. I do not over analyze if something does not seem right I ask myself questions and then if all seem fair I will say or give MHO other than that. Do what you please. If your not on the up and up with yourself at least be it here. We all have stresses we are going thru and something like this comes up people question..... If I were you I would take some of the good advice here and do what you need to do.

  3. #28
    Gold Member Dana44's Avatar
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    That is fantastic Nicole. Yes do take it slow and listen to her, she might be very helpful in the future.
    Part Time Girl

  4. #29
    New Member Nicole11's Avatar
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    Thank you for encouragment, Dana.

    I am trying to do the best I can with being honest with myself and my wife. I did experience a pink fog for a time, but my crossdressing is starting to settle down (I'm trying to shop less).

  5. #30
    Making a life for Tina! suchacutie's Avatar
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    Hi Nicole. Let me see if I can straighten some of this out. One way of summarizing a lot of the comments might be, "your wife should never be surprised when it comes to your feminine side". If she feels your bra strap, it should not be a surprise, but only a confirmation of what you and she agreed that you would do at that moment. Painted nails the same way. She should not be unaware that you were going to paint them, but should only be critiquing your job. She needs to be involved at every moment, unless she has areas in which you are free to roam.

    My wife never tells me what to wear, but she will let me know when I've done something ridiculous in a fashion sense. Your feminine self can bring a lot to your marriage, but not if you hide it from the marriage. Let her be you guide and confident. It will pay huge dividends!

    Best of Luck!

  6. #31
    New Member Nicole11's Avatar
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    Thank you suchacutie. I appreciate your nice advice. But me and my wife do not fit in such a nice cute marriage box that you describe. She is not happy when I wear panties or paint my nails. It is going to take time. I hope we can come to terms with this soon. I wish we I could have a nice honest marriage like yours now, but it's not possible for now and it's going to take time....

  7. #32
    Platinum Member
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    Nicole, in a word, Yes, I doubt the veracity of your post, and I gave my reasons for skepticism. Could I be mistaken in my judgement? Of course. If your situation resembles what you have described, then I'd say you're misleading yourself into believing that any unsupportive spouse, whatever her ideology, is going to somehow evolve in weeks into some more accepting form. If she dislikes panties and nail polish today, that ain't going to change through exposure. If as you indicated, she presumed a drawer full of undies and bras was for a girlfriend...then you got other problems besides cross dressing.

    Maybe you inadvertently compressed time frames... forgot bits of illuminating information or took some poetic license in describing the circumstances or your wife's behavior. Or, maybe you're imagination filled in a few blanks. That's ok...no one here is going to care one way or the other.

    My point, however, isn't whether your posts are true or false, but rather to caution that you don't mislead yourself about who you are, where you would like to be going, by misunderstanding the nature of your wife's objections, nor the process by which these may be resolved, if ever.
    Last edited by kimdl93; 08-21-2017 at 10:41 PM.

  8. #33
    New Member Nicole11's Avatar
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    Hi Kim. Thank you for your nice message. It is not always easy to see eye to eye. . I appreciate it. I am just trying to improve my life, but thank you for your advice. I hope you are doing well.

  9. #34
    Aspiring Artist Kelly DeWinter's Avatar
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    Nicole;

    Members here sometimes have precarious relationship with spouses or gf's . and are often looking to see how we can improve those relationships. So when we see someone who has successfully broken the barrier, we may look up threads to see if it's possible to gather helpful insights. Your current thread and your last show two opposite reactions to you initial disclosure.

    Maybe if you could explain the difference in what you posted?

    Your spouses reaction in your first post is more towards the norm, while your revision in this post is making members think you may be setting yourself up for heartache in the future.

    Have you and your wife had any deep conversations on the subject ?

    Be well,

    Kelly
    Kelly DeWinter
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  10. #35
    New Member Nicole11's Avatar
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    Hi Kelly. Yes, we have had the deep conversation on the subject. Her first reaction was very poor. However, I think she is starting to come around. She at least knows that I am crossdressing regularly and is handling it better than her first reaction. But it still is a very much don't ask don't tell situation though and I am not able to freely dress like I would like. My plan is to have another heart to heart conversation with her about it soon. Hopefully, we can come to an agreement and I will be able to dress up freely.

  11. #36
    Senior Member Nikkilovesdresses's Avatar
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    Her attitude sounds encouraging, but she may just have a very slow digestion. Be cautious- do nothing more than you've done already for 6 months and let the subject come up naturally from time to time- that way you'll be surer of where you both stand. I've seen a number of cases here where an early positive response turned into full-on rejection after a few weeks or months.
    I used to have a short attention spa

  12. #37
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    Nicole, I truly wish you well on your journey.

  13. #38
    Luv doing girl stuff CherylFlint's Avatar
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    My wife says for your wife to “lighten-up and take charge”.
    My wife tells me when to dress and what to wear.
    And when we go out I pass as long as I don’t talk.
    Oh, and she does the driving, too.
    And she checks my makeup.
    We’ve been married for about 20 years.

  14. #39
    New Member Nicole11's Avatar
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    Hi Cheryl. That's great you have such a great relationship with your wife and she is completely involved with your crossdressing. I am working on being more open with my wife. She still is not completely comfortable with me crossdressing in front of her though.

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