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Thread: Does wearing a suit and tie impact on how you feel?

  1. #1
    Silver Member Becky Blue's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005

    Does wearing a suit and tie impact on how you feel?

    I have been a bit quiet on here of late, there is an interesting reason for it

    I usually dress very casually at work (in drab sighhhh) jeans, casual shirts etc. But last week had to wear a suit and tie for most of the week. Strangely I felt very uncomfortable and very male. I could not bring myself to login here and could not get into my usual 'Becky way of mind'.
    In my usual casual clothes a feel relaxed and very gender neutral in my mind and often slip into Beckyland as I call it. Wearing the suit and tie felt so limiting and so unnatural and so male.

    My question is - Does the way you dress in Drab impact on how you feel?
    A.K.A Rebecca & Bec

  2. #2
    Member SaraLin's Avatar
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    Jun 2017
    Central Fla.
    I have turned down good paying jobs because they required me to wear a tie. I hate them. It feels like I'm being strangled. (maybe I was hung as a horse thief in a past life???)

    I'm not sure it made me feel more MALE... just very uncomfortable.

  3. #3
    I can only be me Samm's Avatar
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    Jul 2012
    Absolutely. I was just talking to my wife about this. We just had 2 weddings the past 2 weekends to attend. As they were relatively casual, I did not wear a tie. Just dress pants, shirt and shoes. I told my wife that out of all the outfits she has seen me in, the wedding attire were the ones that felt like a costume to me. I also notice that my everyday male mode tee shirts never seem to fit right. But the girly ones do.

  4. #4
    Life is for having fun. suzy1's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Hampshire, U.K.
    Actually for me no. I am Suzy in my head and always have been although I did not realize it when I was younger.
    I did a thread here the other day about being a lesbian trapped in a mans body which got ‘mixed reviews’?
    We are all diferant. Some just like to dress and need that to feel fem and some are a mix of male and female despite the physical side of our bodies. I think as Suzy even when doing manly things, I am just me.
    Going to get lambasted again.

    Isn't life fun
    Last edited by suzy1; 08-22-2017 at 06:52 AM.

  5. #5
    Platinum Member kimdl93's Avatar
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    Jan 2010
    Almost the Great White North...
    I don't know if the suit changes the way I feel...that would be kinda weird. I do't necessarily feel like a business man in a business suit or a cowboy when I wear boots. I just feel like my same old self.

  6. #6
    Senior Member Laura912's Avatar
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    Jan 2012
    East coast
    Before retiring, wore a tie everyday. Afterwards, the throat ropes have been thinned to a favorite few. Suits come out once or twice a year and usually accompanied by grumbling to my wife about why can't I dress like her. Guess that is the price for being mixed gender.

  7. #7
    Member marlacd's Avatar
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    Apr 2009
    Suits, are suits, are suits. Ever notice that suits look good standing- but sit down in them, and they look awful. Those pants ride up, looking like they don't fit you. One teacher I had in high school, wore a suit every day- with white socks. Buy one, and chances are very good it will be in style-forever. Yes, I feel different when wearing a suit- standing. Sit in it, and I feel like I'm wearing one that doesn't fit. I also feel very male- and uncomfortable.

    I think men's tees are made very cheaply- and short. I've seen those tapered tees, I'd like to try one, but I can't convince myself that $30+ for one is worth it.
    I don't dress up because I want to be a woman, I dress up to make me happy.

  8. #8
    Member Cassiek's Avatar
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    Aug 2016
    SE Pennsylvania
    Underdressing is always an option. In the pats I have been known to wear a really cute and sexy chemise with garters and stockings under my suit. Besides what's wrong with having a little fun playing the hot sexy executive once in a while

  9. #9
    Reality Check Krisi's Avatar
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    Feb 2014
    I act differently when dressed up. I wouldn't work on my car in a suit and tie and I wouldn't go to a funeral in jeans and a T shirt. I dress for the circumstance, not the other way around.

    Interesting story: I used to wear dress clothes and a tie to work. Visitors to the building (wearing suits and ties) would wave and say "good morning" or "hello". Occasionally, I would have "dirty work" planned so I would wear jeans and a work shirt. On those occasions, I couldn't help but notice that the same group of visitors would look at the floor or away when they passed me in the hall.

  10. #10
    Miss Judy Judy-Somthing's Avatar
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    Dec 2015
    I think it's funny!
    When ever there's a gathering of people where you get dressed up,

    The women all dress up in beautiful dresses of all different styles and colors.
    The men wear basically all the same thing, a suite all most always black. Well at least they can go a little crazy with the tie!
    "This is ME" I am not CRAZY, I'm just a GUY who likes dresses!
    Since allot of men dress up in woman's clothing that makes it a manly thing to do!
    Much more fun than fishing.
    I do construction like house building and I love CD-ing, what's the difference?

  11. #11
    Senior Member Karen RHT's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2015
    Niagara Region, Ontario, Canada.
    Suits aren't my favourites. Wore them for years because they were expected, and at times, demanded. Never did like the idea that others expected or demanded me to dress a certain way, still don't. I'm male and don't have a problem with that. Whatever I'm wearing doesn't change or alter the fact that I'm male, and I'm fine with that.


  12. #12
    Senior Member Tracy Irving's Avatar
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    Aug 2016
    I only wear suits when the occasion calls for it but I have absolutely no problem doing so. I feel like a better version of me when I do.

  13. #13
    Aspiring Member GretchenM's Avatar
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    Dec 2016
    Denver, Colorado
    Dressing in drab rarely makes me feel any different. But a suit and tie and all fancied up in pure masculine? It becomes a war. I have never liked those monkey suits and the older I got the more I disliked them. When I do have to wear a suit I often have to brush all the dust off the dark blue jacket or I will look like I just walked out of a the prep room in a bakery. It is the tie that really triggers the animosity. Without a tie is just uncomfortable. But the moment I put that tie around my neck and tuck it under the collar of my shirt the bombs are dropped and exploding everywhere. Once I tried putting on a necklace just to see what would happen. Nothing happened. Took it off, put on the tie, and I had to duck and cover.

  14. #14
    Gold Member Jaylyn's Avatar
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    Apr 2013
    Most definitely Becky it impacts the way I feel. I feel strangled in suits and ties. I told my wife she had better not bury me in one or I would come back and haunt her. I hate suits just to be point on about them. I love my wranglers, bots and shirts ( which are now mostly Columbia Fishing shirts) they are way cooler working but do have draw backs when working in brush. I don't think my work clothes have an impact on my labor on the farm. Let's face it you can work in high heels in the sand and grass burrs. I do have a change of attitude when I dress in my soft dresses or my panties and the frilly things. I think we all do that. I feel excited to almost anxious about dressing. The drab I have work in just comes with the job. Good high top boots to keep the burrs and rattlers away and good socks to comfortably make it thru the day are just a way of life out here. Suits unless your the preacher or banker are not worn very much. I even wear my newest wranglers n a long sleeve shirt to Church but will throw a jacket over the shirt for funerals and such. It definantly impacts how I feel. I'm still me under neath but my clothes set the tone of how I am supposed to act and feel.

  15. #15
    Neanderthal in nylons Julie Denier's Avatar
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    Jul 2008
    Guess I'm the odd one here. I love wearing suits and ties. For work, I only need to wear them for conferences and trade shows, but I wouldn't have a problem if I had to wear them more often. Love a sharp suit with a great tie and a coordinating pocket square. Whether en femme or en dude, I love classic, polished looks.

  16. #16
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Northeast USA
    Becky, I recently went to a wedding in a black suit and tie black socks and shoes with a tie to match my wife's lined lace gorgeous blue dress with silver shoes and I was feeling quite envious. I now just getting to a point where I can at times integrate a Sara state of mind with the outside appearing all male but it is still much a work in progress so I see where you are coming from.

    Glad to have you back!

  17. #17
    Member CarleyR's Avatar
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    Aug 2012
    midwestern USA

    Dressing well in either gender

    Quote Originally Posted by Tracy Irving View Post
    I only wear suits when the occasion calls for it but I have absolutely no problem doing so. I feel like a better version of me when I do.
    I agree with Tracy. I guess I like to look good no matter what gender is being presented.
    I love myself in curves!

  18. #18
    Senior Member Nikkilovesdresses's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2014
    The lingerie dept.
    It sounds obvious, but the secret to comfortable neckties is the collar size of the shirt. Measure your neck than add at least an inch, maybe even 2". You'll still look smart, but you'll be a lot happier.
    I used to have a short attention spa

  19. #19
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    Feb 2006
    Yes, for sure !!
    Wearing a suit and tie makes me feel like I'm going to the gallows. The noose is around my neck.
    Generally this is only at weddings in my case which makes it even worse as I'm surrounded by women in all those beautiful dresses and I long to shed my shackles and spread my wings in something beautiful and flowing.
    Can you see the REAL Me?

  20. #20
    Platinum Blonde member Ressie's Avatar
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    Feb 2008
    Nikki^ is correct. Those that are complaining about being choked most likely need a larger size neck. Or, you can skip buttoning the top button. It won't show if your tie isn't loose. OTOH, too big a neck size won't look right either.

    To me suits feel more like fem clothing than jeans & T shirt - because the material has polyester or even silk added. Ties have a silky feel to them too. I got a hug from a bride a few years ago and she loved the soft feel of my cotton suede sport jacket.

    I've also noticed that when I wear a suit & tie more women look my way. I guess they equate that look with power, money etc. No, I'm not an attorney; far from it.
    "You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder

  21. #21
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Western Washington
    Before I retired I worked across the desk from CPA's, attorneys and professional men and women. There was no written requirement to wear and suit and tie. I wore a dress shirt, tie, shined shoes and slacks. If I did wear a suit jacket/sport coat it would have been hanging in the corner of my office. I always wore solid color shirts..sometimes white, but rarely. I expressed how I felt getting out of bed through the ties I wore. Dressing professionally when dealing with professionals always had a positive impact on my mind. Women in my office dressed so casually it was insulting to the clients we dealt with. Some looked as if they were headed to the beach. Way to unprofessional. Dressing so casual usually undermined any authority which the clients perceived we had. I have preened my male wardrobe of dress shirts and ties. I still project how I feel any given day with the graphic tee shirts I wear.

    The only nexus between how I dressed as a male with how I dress as a woman can be stated as "all in." I do not own any women's pants..anything with legs. It's always a pretty dress and heels with all the proper undergarments. I guess I slip quite easily between male role and female acting.

  22. #22
    Gold Member Lana Mae's Avatar
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    May 2016
    North Carolina
    As Daniel Webster said, "A necktie is a device of the Devil!" I feel like a stuffed shirt! Way too stuffy for me! Jeans and a tee shirt! Dress up male mode cargo pants and a button up shirt/pull over shirt! Suits are for funerals and weddings! Hugs Lana Mae
    Life is worth living!
    "Foxy lady! You look so good!!" Jimi Hendrix

  23. #23
    Hellion on Heels Kayliedaskope's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2017
    Tucson, AZ / Redwood City, CA
    "Work boots, one blue suit
    Size too small, don't wear at all
    Unless somebody kicks, gets hitched
    Don't fit, makes me itch"
    -Trace Adkins - Rough & Ready

    I could never do a regular dress tie - as many others have said, it's like being strangled. However, getting all dressed up in western wear for a Saturday night dance, I have worn bolo ties, which are the official neckwear in Arizona.

    Nothing wrong with wearing a suit, but I prefer a button-down and a nice pair of jeans.
    Last edited by Kayliedaskope; 08-22-2017 at 01:16 PM.

  24. #24
    Aspiring Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    Sorry Girls but I'm with Tracey, Julie & Carley. I love looking good in a coat and tie. When I'm in male mode I want to look like a well groomed man.

    I've never had a problem wearing ties. Wore them in grade school, high school and the Academy. They went with my uniform in the USN along with when ever I dressed up. I love the nice comments I get from women when I dress well. The Guard at the Federal Courthouse gave me a very nice compliment last week when I showed up in a coat and tie. I rivaled the attorney in the rumpled Sear Sucker Suit!

    When it's enfemme I present as feminine as possible.

  25. #25
    Junior Member Brandy Fromdaburg's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2017
    I hate wearing uniforms, and that is exactly what a suit is. They make me feel uncomfortable.
    Gnothi Seauton

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