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Thread: Sweet is not sweet without sour

  1. #1
    Silver Member Maria 60's Avatar
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    Sweet is not sweet without sour

    We had my wife's cousins from Europe for the last few weeks, that's why I haven't been around much. The last week my inlaws went on holidays and her cousins slept at our place, one night I made bbg and after dinner I make a coffee. We were sitting outside and my wife's cousins husband asked me why I wasn't wearing a skirt (wow what does he know). He said where he comes from men don't touch the kitchen or make dinner or coffee and the men in Canada are the women in the house hold. I explained to him that we both work and we have to help out.
    After a few days they were with us, my wife was getting nervous because her cousin had to serve him hand and foot, she had to lay his clothes on the bed after he showered, cut his meat and react at every call. My wife asked her cousin if she's his wife or maid, her cousin said that's how it is in Europe the man goes to work and the women stays home and takes care of the house and her husband. My wife couldn't wait till they left because she couldn't handle seeing her cousin being treated like that and her cousin telling her how lucky she was to have a great husband who helps out.
    Well on Monday I come home from work and find a dress hanging in my washroom, I asked her why she bought me a dress for, she said because she feels lucky to have me and even with me wearing women's clothing and doing no harm to anyone it's better then having a husband like her cousin has. I told her they have a different life style and he's a old school man and that's how it is there and there's nothing wrong with it, that's how my father was too.
    Sometimes sweet is not sweet without sour, a person has to see worse to know what they have, maybe some of the unsupportive wifes should taste some sour and see how sweet they really have it.
    I thought I would share this, I found it interesting how my wife reacted.

  2. #2
    Gold Member Dana44's Avatar
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    I have to agree that in america, life has changed dramatically for many households. I have to do a lot for my GF as her right hands is really bad. She has stated that she can do some manly stuff and I do the girl stuff. I do the most cooking and get her pills and stuff as she cannot do it. But I do not mind it. I also have to do the laundry and run the sweeper also.
    Part Time Girl

  3. #3
    Member Cherylgyno's Avatar
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    Very interesting. Some of the European countries aren't the only place that women are treated like slaves. I was in an Asian country, I gathered some dishes after dinner. I thought the husband was going to go through the roof.
    We have a system that works for us. If I am closer, I do the chore. If I notice that the carpet needs vacuuming, I vacuum. If the chore requires more muscle it is my responsibility. Vegetable garden, both of us.
    I don't think that it's the Cross dresser in me. I think that it's the human in me.

  4. #4
    I accept myself as is Gillian Gigs's Avatar
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    Sorry, I don't get off on the me Tarzan, you Jane mentality. People often wonder why I refer to some guys as being a knuckle dragging neanderthal, well your wife's cousin is married to one of them. Marriage is a 50/50 proposition and both parties should be treated with dignity and respect.
    I like myself, regardless of the packaging that I may come in! It's what is on the inside of the package that counts!

  5. #5
    Lady By Choice Leslie Langford's Avatar
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    I don't know which European country you are referring to, but if anything, it must be one that the 21st century has clearly by-passed, if not the 20th century as well. Likely some isolated, under-developed rural pocket somewhere in the Mediterranean Sea area or else a former Eastern Block nation, but even these are slowly falling in line with the rest of the modern world.

    If anything, Western and Northern Europeans are even more advanced than we are here in North America when it comes to gender equity, women's rights, equal pay for equal work, maternity (as well as paternity) leave and associate benefits, as well as cradle-to-grave social support networks.

    Your wife's cousin's husband sounds like a first class jerk to me, his wife is nothing more than a brainwashed enabler, and the "Europe/Old Country" excuse is just a smokescreen and a crutch to justify his appalling behaviour. "Europe" really has nothing to do with this...we have these types of social misfits, wife abusers, and assorted sociopaths here in North America as well (as in "honour killings", among other things), but thankfully, that breed of misogynist is slowly dying out as social pressures make this type of attitude and treatment of women more and more unacceptable if not downright illegal.

    As Canada's selfie-loving, feminist Prime Minister Justin Trudeau would put it "Why? Because it is 2017."

  6. #6
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    Perhaps your cousin is simply using the other culture excuse because she wants this type of relationship, but would be embarrassed to admit it. We have to remember that it takes all kinds to make a world. There are many American women who actually want the life of a submissive, including those who are willing to wear those all covering bizarre middle eastern black coverings, and belong to a man. Why? Who knows.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  7. #7
    Senior Member Nikkilovesdresses's Avatar
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    As someone who's lived in a number of countries, including the US, Canada, Asia and Europe, I can assure you that in western european countries it's impossible to generalise about such things and it's certainly untrue to say that European men always wear the trousers. Having said that, the farther east and south you go in Europe, the more old fashioned the cultures.

    FWIW I think the clearest examples of old fashioned sexism I've seen have been from Australian men, not least high ranking government officials.
    I used to have a short attention spa

  8. #8
    Junior Member GinaSkirt's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cherylgyno View Post
    I don't think that it's the Cross dresser in me. I think that it's the human in me.
    I feel you Cheryl. I grew up doing chores, responsibilities and lived on my own in a clean place. Then my EX wife did nothing so even though I worked if I wanted to eat or have clean clothes I had to shop and do all the cleaning. My current wife came from an abusive relationship like below only worked too. Even after years of our marriage she is still amazed if I see something that needs done I just do it. Though I wouldn't mind a new dress for just being me lol.
    I do agree Miss if it works for them who cares. After all don't we want people to accept crossdressing makes us happy.
    "Life is not a journey to the grave with the
    intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body,

    but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming -- WOW-- What a Ride!"

  9. #9
    Mannequiniste ! Stacy Darling's Avatar
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    You have a lucky wife Maria.
    Many of our wives are lucky to have husbands which share the chores and duties. There are so many disrespectful people still in this world!

    Gender roles mean the same to me as my gender itself, probably why I'm a content House Husband/Wife!

    Stacy!
    STOP, Well I just dance the way I feel
    Stop breathing imagine none of this is real

    Well I just dance the way I feel
    Well I just dance the way I feel
    Well I just dance the way I feel
    "Ou Est Le Swimming Pool"

  10. #10
    Senior Member Tracy Irving's Avatar
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    I don't know what country he lives in but if he ever eats dinner at a nice restaurant there is close to an 80% chance the chef is male.

  11. #11
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    Maria,
    I think the guy as taking advantage of the situation, to me no matter what country he comes from he was just being lazy and selfish. I have traveled through Europe and most countries are enlightened now , western culture has touched most countries .

  12. #12
    Carole carhill2mn's Avatar
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    Good for your wife! Thanks for sharing.
    Hugs, Carole

  13. #13
    Banned Spammer
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    Could be he is just an asshole.
    Might be abusive too you never know

  14. #14
    Aspiring Member GracieRose's Avatar
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    I would rather be sharing what needs to be done, than having someone wait on me hand and foot. I think your visitors are missing out.
    I'd love it if my wife got me a dress in appreciation for sharing responsibilities. Your wife is a keeper (but you already know that).

  15. #15
    Gold Member Lana Mae's Avatar
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    I always helped or did the household chores! My wife passed away in 2015! Prior to her passing, I was doing all the household chores including cooking! This guy sounds like a real asshole! My wife's first husband would get drunk or high and abuse her but this guy sounds even worse! That of course is between them! Hugs Lana Mae
    Life is worth living!
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  16. #16
    Senior Member kayegirl's Avatar
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    Once again Tracii G has got it right. The man is simply a complete asshole, and his comments are not in any way typical of any European country. But I suppose that there are people like him in every country of the world, including the USA.

  17. #17
    happy to be her Sarah Doepner's Avatar
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    There are other cultures where that old division of labor seems to still be practiced. My daughter has had a series of boy friends who grew up in traditional Mexican households and they treated her that way. She grew up with me having a full time job, cooking, cleaning, laundry and driving kids to sports and arts activities. No wonder she left each one until she finally found a guy who is a lot more like her dad, except for a couple of major things. She knows I'm trans and she says he isn't, and he can dance, something I've never mastered.
    Last edited by Sarah Doepner; 08-31-2017 at 05:25 PM. Reason: spelling
    Sarah
    Being transgender isn't a lifestyle choice. How you deal with it is.

  18. #18
    I accept myself as is Gillian Gigs's Avatar
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    After much thought, I decided to add more thoughts on the subject. I don't believe that chauvinism is restricted to any nationality, but can be found everywhere. This guy sounds like a real male chauvinist _______, maybe near the top of the heap. Growing up, I can't say whether my mother was a feminist, but she taught me that if you make the mess, then you clean it up. I learned how to wash, vacuum, dust, and clean up not only my own personal space, but the other spaces that were within my play area. In married life I help out where ever necessary with any chores that need doing. If some one is looking for a maid, then hire one, your wife is your help mate, not your servant! If we want equal rights in wearing the clothes we wish to wear, then we need to step up and do our equal share of the work around the home front also.
    On a lighter note, I usually wear a skirt etc, when doing house work. I guess I'm not a chauvinist then...lol.
    I like myself, regardless of the packaging that I may come in! It's what is on the inside of the package that counts!

  19. #19
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    Please do not treat all of Europe as backward like this. I live in Scotland and we not only have a lot of leaders of political parties who are women, but the majority of male and female party leaders are gay or bisexual. No one cares about their sexuality. As far as I can see most European countries are way more liberal than the US.

  20. #20
    Hellion on Heels Kayliedaskope's Avatar
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    When I was with my previous girlfriend (before I cd'd), I was at a thanksgiving dinner with her family and friends. After dinner, the men were all sitting around the table bullshitting, and the women were all clearing the table. When I got up to help clear the table, the father said, "Sit back down. Men don't do that in this house - that's women's work." Holding a handful of dishes, I looked him square in the eye and said, "Well, I don't know how you were raised, but my momma always taught me that if you make a mess, you clean it up." I got hugs and kisses from all the ladies!
    Last edited by Kayliedaskope; 09-01-2017 at 06:12 PM.

  21. #21
    Member rian's Avatar
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    before my wife knew my secret , she treated me differently ,,,i felt there was a wall that women and men do not cross,,,yet after her knowledge of my crossdressing we became like sisters we share every thing ,,,even some times lipstick ...and we became more intimate ,,,she liked me more ...even though she does not like to see me in skirts ,,,i think she was jalouse that i look more sexy than her ,,,,
    Cross-dressing is a cross between woman's soul and man's heart.....

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