Teresa, this may be a culture issue. I don't know what it's like in the UK, but in the US that line of reasoning has been used for decades as a successful defense for men in rape trials -- "she was asking for it" or "dressed like that what did she expect to happen?" So they're kind of charged words over here. It blames the victim and it exonerates the actions of the perpetrator. So that may explain the strong reaction you got.