Braver?

[Steph_CD_62]

Lately I've noticed that I'm not hiding the fact that I am a crossdresser as much as I used to. Does this make me braver or that the older I get the less I care what others think?

At one time I would be nervous when I wore panties out in public, but now I wear them 24/7 for the past 3 or 4 years. I get yearly check ups and I used to always wear my men's underwear when I went to see the doctor. This year I wore a pair of panties and I wasn't nervous or anything when the doctor asked me to drop my pants and underwear so he could do the prostate exam. I pulled both down at the same time and pulled them both up at the same time. True my panties didn't scream girly, they were a nice boy short made of nylon/spandex.

I've been wearing a bra out in public more often. At one time I would only do it when it was really cold and I could wear a heavy coat and keep it zipped up most of the time while inside. Now I will wear a bra while wearing a lighter jacket and not worry about if it is zipped up.

When I do our weekly shopping I almost always wear women's jeans and sometimes more. I have even worn my women's boots. I have a pair of women's tennis shoes but not quite ready to wear them out in public.

I have gone out for a drive while fully dressed, but I don't wear make-up or wigs. I went outside of town and got out of my car and even took a couple selfies. Plus I did take several other selfies while I was inside of the car.

I wear women's jeans on the weekends out in public and I don't even think twice about it. I have even attended family functions while wearing women's jeans. One day I even went over to my daughter's house wearing my women's boots. I didn't realize her boyfriend was there until I got there, and of course my daughter made a comment shortly after I got there. I did have to run back home to get some tools, so I did change back into my men's tennis shoes. Yes my daughter knows about me, but I have not fully dressed in front of her.

My wife had a doctor's appointment in Omaha and everything I wore was women's clothing. I wore panties, thigh high stockings, women's jeans, women's shirt and my women's boots. True everything looked gender neutral except my boots unless you looked closely. And my boots were under my jeans and there is almost no heel so unless someone looked down they couldn't notice.

While dressed at home I used to hurry as I passed windows, to make sure no one could see me. Now I will do the dishes in plain sight of the neighbors if they looked. Our kitchen window faces our neighbor's house and the only thing that separates us is a double wide driveway. Our driveways touch each other and so it can't be much more than 20 feet between our houses. Also I have gone out on our front porch in plain sight of neighbors and anyone driving by our house.

I am not ready to go out in public fully dressed as a woman but I am slowly wearing more and more women's clothing out in public and caring what others think.

So am I braver or just not caring what others think? I really don't know and it really doesn't matter why either.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi H M G , I think as time goes on we get more daring ......

[Lana Mae]

It is just the steps moving you along on your journey! It does take some courage to go out there but as we get older we do care less about what others think! Maybe a combination type thing! Hugs Lana Mae

[Janine cd]

I agree with Lana Mae. The older I get, the less I am concerned about what others think about me.

[sometimes_miss]

I think that as we get older, some of the potential problems that can come with coming out, simply decrease in how much they will effect us. Kids are grown and out of the house, once retired it no longer will effect our income or work, and for many whose sex life simply 'isn't what it used to be', or is gone completely for medical reasons, there's no worry about it getting any worse.
Easy to be brave if you have nothing much to lose.

[NancySue]

I’m not so sure our progression has anything to do with bravery. I believe it’s just part of the continuing process. Over the years, I progressed from item to item...starting with hose. When I reached the “totally dressed” level, that’s when my real adventures began. I began wearing underneath, then more and more. I’ve been out many times, for drives, walks, shopping, etc. At each level, my “concerns” diminished. It’s now the norm. My wife’s support and acceptance has helped immeasurably. We live in a small community, therefore our primary concern is discovery. So, we spend a lot of time out of town. Where there’s a will, there’s a way. Best to you as your journey continues.

[Stephanie47]

Having a supportive wife is probably the key to being more relaxed about cross dressing. When you no longer fear loss of income because a boss or coworkers discover your interests that really reduces angst. Kids out of the house is a positive. You're basically reduced to your own uneasiness about outing yourself. Unless there is an unexpected encounter of a negative nature taking those baby steps will lead to taking the final step. But, what will the final step be? Interaction with others fully en femme? That the question for all of us.

[JenniferR771]

I am thinking...it takes more clothes to get that intense stimulation and thrill...now that I am older. Also you get used to women's undergarments, (and other women's clothes. ) The thrill is gone--until--I get bolder. So true, it didn't take much to get my libido started when I was 19. My entire girly wardrobe could be stored in a shoe box. It takes more now--and my girly storage is way bigger now.
I am bolder--retired now--no employer to worry about.
There is a slow acceptance of more cross-gender attitudes. Cable TV, internet, more news outlets, we appear on magazines covers and TV shows like "Transparent". That helps me to relax if I appear outside my home.

[Teresa]

It's just stages of coming totally out .

I may be beginning to sound like an old record but have you thought about finding a social group, you can then put it all together and come out totally in comfort. You will find it will bring all the behaviour you describe into balance . At the moment you are pushing the envelope a little more each time once you've done it fully you'll wonder what all the fuss is about .

It brings meaning to your dressing , you have to get into your car and drive to the venue so that has a purpose rather than driving aimlessly round . I have no regrets about it at all, chatting with other CDers and their wives meeting TSs who have gone through full transition.

The point about not caring does appear to come with age, we have less to lose , besides we realise what people think isn't going to change us .

[ronniegirl]

I will second what Jennifer has said..I too started very simply with just panties and slowly over the years especially lately, increased my wardrobe to the point where I have more female clothes than male..It was a progression that now I wear panty hose with shorts, underdress all the time and don't really care it the bra straps show through the shirt. I guess its like most of the girls here have said they are more confident and accepting of who we are as we get older

[Krea]

I think it is a case of gradually gaining the confidence to be who you really are.

I am comparatively new to CDing (a couple of years) but in the last few months things have progressed noticably. I am only out to my wife, but i now feel much more comfortable wearing certain things when we are at home together. Underdressing when i go out has gone from a nervous first-time effort to something i can now do without any worries. Maybe next step forward might be wearing womens skinny jeans outside.

[EmilyByNight]

I would say I'm braver. Before I wouldn't even leave my room. Now I wear a little bit when I'm with close friends. Overall, I still hide it more than most.

[sara66]

Age makes us a little braver and careless what others thinks.
Sara

[Leslie Mary S]

I have started going to a local gay bar. my cloths don't quite fit with the younger generation. Now I shoot over 150 photos a night, with their permission, of the Drag Queens while they are performing. I do NOT take photos of the rest of the people. I have over 900 photos.
But you realize that it is a eleven mile drive each way. I have stopped and bought fuel twice (A service station I have never used before). From when I leave the house till I return, I am dressed. twice to the 'nines'. The DQ are trying to talk me into doing a DQ slot some evening. I think I will continue to pass that up.

[Jaylyn]

I think mine has been as I age I wear more what I want. I used to wear my panties under my jeans and worry what if I had a car accident or got hurt and there I'd be wearing panties. Now I even wear my panties almost daily. Never even give it a second thought but ever now and then something happens like some one pulls out in front of me and I think oh I'm glad I was in an accident I've got my panties on. Maybe I'm just getting older and bolder. Still don't wear them to the doctors because of our small community. Gossip spreads fast here.

[Bobbi46]

Being more content with our lives and for those of us who have retired, work pressures have all gone, life becomes easier and with it comes a more positive outlook on life and more confidence in what we are doing.
Do I care less what others think of me ? of course I do in fact I have become more caring than ever more.
Braver in a way but I think confidence overrules some of this bravery, surely one goes with the other, at least I hope so.
Jaylyn, you have should have no fear of wearing panties to the Dr they have seen everything before and they wood be breaking there Hippocratic oath by gossiping about who wears what in their exam rooms. I wear my panties to my Dr also.

[Brandybea]

The passing years have definitely made me less nervous, and more brave being Brandy. It likely is a combination of wanting more acceptance and a changing society that is becoming more accepting of us. I still and a little shy when it comes to going out but spend most days wearing panties under my clothes.

[Sometimes Steffi]

For what it's worth. I'm really proud of you.

[jamiecd636]

I am not sure of the reason, but my growing desire to dress just feels like the right thing. I think this forum has helped me become braver, reading about everyone's experiences. I am not ready to come out to family and friends, my ultimate experience would be to spend a day shopping with a GG, picking out cloths, trying them on, shopping for makeup, and just being girly.

[suzanne]

At my favorite dress shop, a sales lady told me I was "the bravest person" she knew. I still don't know about that. But what did happen is that my confidence has increased and sense of apprehension decreased when I started to care less what others think. I guess that looks like bravery.

Like the OP, I am a man in a dress. I don't do forms, wig or makeup. That makes blending in and disappearing into the crowd out of the question. I am out there and owning it. Does that mean I'm brave? I still don't think so. I'm just too tired and too old to spend the rest of my life cowering in the closet.

[Sami Brown]

For myself, it has far more to do with bravery than with not caring because I am older. I am a chicken at heart, but with each step of my progression, I am turning from a chicken to a totally confident swan (or peacock, or some other bird, lol).

[HollyGreene]

I think that the more we wear women's clothes in public, the more we realise that no one is taking any notice. Consequently, we feel more confident about it, so we push the boundary a little more.

[Bobbi46]

Being brave is when you take your first step outside after that confidence and comfort comes into play, before you realise nobody is outwardly looking at you at all. That's happened to me more recently.

[Susan Smokes]

I don't know if it is me being braver or me just needing to express my new life as a cross dresser. I guess right now I am flying buy the seat of my panties, but I need to be true to myself, and just follow my feelings.

[Tracy Irving]

Getting a driver's license and used car at 16 gave me the freedom to purchase my first few pair of panties. I would wear them in public thinking that I can't believe I am wearing panties and nobody is noticing, especially at school. And of course they weren't! Even back then, I didnt think I was brave to do that.

The same is true for today. There are very few people with a life so utterly void of meaning and purpose that they find it crucial for their well being to critize the clothing choices of a complete stranger. Some people may do a double take, smile or nod their head but they really don't care about a 10 second diversion in their busy life. Congratulations on getting out there and being you.