Hi
I know this subject has been chewed on in this forum, but I wanted to share my personal dilemma.
I am a very open and honest person (a bad liar you might say), and I told most of my girlfriends over the years about my CD'ing, I told my mother and sisters about it when I was 18 yr old. When I started dating my wife, I told her after a month (she ignored & blocked it initially, but that dissolved over the years, but that's a different story).
But, my CD'ing was always indoors, in private. Just recently I started CD'ing around my wife when the kids are not in the house and I want out for the first time with a female costume. So telling close people I CD isn't a must.
Yet, somehow, I feel the urge & need to tell more people: my sister in law, my wife's girlfriend, a co-worker… (all women BTW. Do feel like sharing with men ). I once spoke to a therapist about this (back when I was single), and he suggested that I do that to create intimacy. I share my big secret. Hmmm… maybe that was true back than when I was single, but it doesn't feel right anymore, since now I want to tell women whom I have a close relationship. A different therapist asked me what would I talk about with those women, if they knew I CD. My answer was talking about girly things, like clothes and makeup, to which my therapist replied that I can talk to them about that stuff anyway, without telling them.
My wife doesn't want me to tell anyone, especially people she knows. I think she feels it projects badly on her, or maybe she still ashamed of it. And as you girls pointed out before, telling people you CD is irreversible.
I think that when I speak to women who knows about my CD (wife, sisters), the conversation can flow in to areas they would not normally go there when women talk to a men.. I don’t know, it still doesn’t account for my need to out myself.
I would love to hear your thoughts and comments..
Thanks, Michal