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Thread: New to this site and need opinions and thoughts

  1. #1
    Emmmily
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    New to this site and need opinions and thoughts

    I mainly only wear women’s underwear when I crossdress, but every time I go to buy them anymore I get nervous or don’t end up buying them. I want to wear them still but can’t seem to ever go through with the sale anymore..

  2. #2
    Junior Member Oria's Avatar
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    Amazon is a good place to get that sort of thing with out much stress. You can also go to any major retailers website.
    Sarah

  3. #3
    Junior Member Ronnica's Avatar
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    I always look in the store then go online for the purchase. I am too nervous also.

  4. #4
    Aspiring Member Alberta_Pat's Avatar
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    It would be a rare situation where a salesperson/cashier questions your purchase of underwear.

    Many men make this purchase for their ladies. Brave face, and carry on.
    Inside every good man, there is a good woman.

  5. #5
    Banned Spammer
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    Fine a place with a self check out.
    We have all been in the same place you are and we have gotten over the fear as will you eventually.
    You know a REAL man would have no problem buying panties for his wife without giving a thought to what someone else thinks so buying panties is a manly act is it not?

    The cashier doesn't care who they are for and probably isn't paying attention as the scan the product.
    When you think about it the only one with the problem about buying panties is you.
    Last edited by Tracii G; 10-06-2017 at 03:48 PM.

  6. #6
    Silver Member Bobbi46's Avatar
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    Say to yourself tomorrow I am going to do it, the world as we know it now is so liberal in that respect the sa's are not bothered either way who buys what and why most of the time they do not have the time to chat and it would not do for one of them to say are these for you?
    You will be fine, be bold and just go for it, after your first purchase you will wonder what all the worry was for. We have all gone through that moment at some time.
    I started life a lost man now I am a found woman

  7. #7
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    Absolutely! Go for it. I used to be all kinds of nervous when I went shopping. Not anymore! I stroll the lingerie and underwear department like I own it. A couple weeks ago I did have an older lady scowl at me as I was looking at a bra. I just held it up to my front and smiled, winked and walked away. I do still get a little nervous trying on dresses in a major store. I was once told by a wise person "if you are afraid to do something - just go ahead and do it afraid"! It really does get easier.
    Lace and Smiles,
    Lisa

  8. #8
    Gold Member Dana44's Avatar
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    I would say go do it and feel confidant. The SA's are much better now.
    Part Time Girl

  9. #9
    Silver Member Micki_Finn's Avatar
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    Buy online. Amazon sells EVERYthing.

  10. #10
    Silver Member Bobbi46's Avatar
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    Buying on line is all very nice but if one is new to things like I think Emmmily is then buying online all the time is not the answer to gaining confidence after all how many times has online buying gone belly up?, you cannot actual beat shopping and taking small steps is the start of a wonderful journey towards full confidence.
    I started life a lost man now I am a found woman

  11. #11
    Gold Member ~Joanne~'s Avatar
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    Wait until you need to go shopping for a bunch of things and just throw them in the basket. If you have a lot then they will be scanning them quickly and might not notice but won't care the same. When I first started, by myself, I use to buy my drab stuff, a few of "her" things, cat food, dog food, and Me food. There was such a mix there was no way the SA was mentioning any one thing, if she did I would have said "You want to talk about the dog food next? I don't know much about that either" lol
    Flip Flops were made for Beaches & Bath Houses, We have neither in 2017. Lose the flip flops!

  12. #12
    Emmmily
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    Thanks everyone, I still live at home though and if I buy online I’m afraid my parents will see it though!

  13. #13
    Hellion on Heels Kayliedaskope's Avatar
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    Emily, first of all let me say: welcome to the forums! Don't be shy about asking questions - we're all a bunch of (mostly) good people here, and we don't bite .... much .... or hard .... unless you like that kinda thing ... but I digress.....

    As for your obvious nervousness about purchasing women's underwear in the stores, don't be. We were all told that it was forbidden, naughty, taboo ... all the usual stuff. Bottom line: the sales associates aren't going to get on the intercom and holler "Y'all come ovah heah to the women's department - we gots a MAN buying hisself some frilly panties!!" Maybe that happens in a bad cross dressing story, but in real life, the SA's don't really care as long as they make the sale. And the SA's that know it's for you and are totally cool with it? THOSE are the ones that will go out of their way to help you and make your shopping experiences pleasant.

    Once you find one of those associates that gives you excellent service, make sure that you write a complimentary note to corporate. "Hi, my name is Michelle, and I'm a crossdresser. I was very nervous about going into your store at first, but Gail made me feel so welcome and comfortable ..." ALWAYS do this. It let's corporate know that a real person is specifically calling out how awesome this particular SA is, and how well you were treated.

    Stop. Breathe, let it out. Take it easy. Chill, ese, it's just underwear.

  14. #14
    Silver Member Micki_Finn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Emmmily View Post
    Thanks everyone, I still live at home though and if I buy online I’m afraid my parents will see it though!
    Ah the crux of the problem. Either suck it up and tell your parents, or get yourself your own place. You have lots of years ahead of you to dress so take care of your situation first, then you’ll have the freedom to do as you please.

    If you have money to spare, go to the post office, UPS store, Mailboxes etc, or similar place and get yourself a PO box.

  15. #15
    Junior Member Oria's Avatar
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    Get a PO Box
    Sarah

  16. #16
    Slip Into Something Femme Piora's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Oria View Post
    Amazon is a good place to get that sort of thing with out much stress. You can also go to any major retailers website.
    Second that. When I was in my late 20s and early 30s, I could go into any store and buy anything without batting an eye. Corsets, panties, stockings....anything. But all that changed. For some reason, now in my 60s, I'm terrified of shopping in person. Amazon is where I buy all of my things. Once you determine your size on everything, ordering is painless. You just have to pay attention to the notes about sizing, and be sure to read comments and reviews on the products.

    Thanks everyone, I still live at home though and if I buy online I’m afraid my parents will see it though!
    You could arrange to have it shipped to your nearby postal outlet....although some Amazon vendors won't allow you to do that. The other suggestion of a post box is another option.
    Last edited by Piora; 10-06-2017 at 05:13 PM.
    "Taking the time to be in touch with my feminine side"

  17. #17
    Emmmily
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    Quote Originally Posted by Piora View Post
    Second that. When I was in my late 20s and early 30s, I could go into any store and buy anything without batting an eye. Corsets, panties, stockings....anything. But all that changed. For some reason, now in my 60s, I'm terrified of shopping in person. Amazon is where I buy all of my things. Once you determine your size on everything, ordering is painless. You just have to pay attention to the notes about sizing, and be sure to read comments and reviews on the products.



    You could arrange to have it shipped to your nearby postal outlet....although some Amazon vendors won't allow you to do that. The other suggestion of a post box is another option.

    I’m still kinda new to wearing panties, how does sizing work?

  18. #18
    New Member Morgan lace's Avatar
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    I love going in the shops and asking the SA if they think they will fit me. These days the staff cant risk being anything but professional.
    Ive had some very interesting conversations and made new friends.

    One girl at a local store puts things to one side for me that she thinks I will like, or she would like to imagine me in.
    She knows I am married and has even told my wife that she has something on hold for me.

  19. #19
    Slip Into Something Femme Piora's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Emmmily View Post
    I’m still kinda new to wearing panties, how does sizing work?
    When browsing panties, if you don't see a size pull-down window, then they are one-size. Depending on your figure, these might fit you no problem. But if you have a waist of say, around 32-36, and there is a pull-down selection for size (small-XXlarge)then you would use Amazon's size chart which will give you your size depending on your waist measurement. Sometimes the vendor on Amazon will specify not to use Amazon's chart, and will provide their own, since sizing is dependent on the manufacturer sometimes.

    Hope this helps!
    "Taking the time to be in touch with my feminine side"

  20. #20
    Emmmily
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    Quote Originally Posted by Piora View Post
    When browsing panties, if you don't see a size pull-down window, then they are one-size. Depending on your figure, these might fit you no problem. But if you have a waist of say, around 32-36, and there is a pull-down selection for size (small-XXlarge)then you would use Amazon's size chart which will give you your size depending on your waist measurement. Sometimes the vendor on Amazon will specify not to use Amazon's chart, and will provide their own, since sizing is dependent on the manufacturer sometimes.

    Hope this helps!

    I’m around a waist size of 34. What normally speaking size should I go for?

  21. #21
    Banned Read only
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    Emmmily,
    First of all get to know your size, then write it down so when you go into a shop say you want something nice for your GF and tell them you didn't know her sizes so you've written it down and show them the piece of paper. Also add that if they the wrong size is it OK for her to come and change them, that usually works.They then usually ask what style does she like so you can then choose what you want without worrying so much. Paying can sometimes be a problem but I've found shopping first thing on a Monday morning preferably if it's raining, that's when I've found you have the store to yourself .
    OK you can still have problems , I wanted to catch the sales, so asked a SA very politely if she could help along the lines I've described , she called out in front of other customers to another SA , " Ladies underwear for the gentleman !" I was as red as the underwear I was standing by. The other SA called back , " Ask him to wait by the Charnos knicker rack !" These two had obviously done all this before and were having some fun at my expense , no I didn't chicken out !
    It does get easier but shopping in reality can be so much more fun once you get over your nerves .
    Last edited by Teresa; 10-06-2017 at 05:49 PM.

  22. #22
    Slip Into Something Femme Piora's Avatar
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    I would say Large or X-large. But if the ones you're looking at happen to be one-size, then they will still more than likely fit you. I suggest buying inexpensive pairs around a large or X-large. That way you get an idea on the fit. But the size charts are always there to help you.
    "Taking the time to be in touch with my feminine side"

  23. #23
    Emmmily
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    Quote Originally Posted by Piora View Post
    I would say Large or X-large. But if the ones you're looking at happen to be one-size, then they will still more than likely fit you. I suggest buying inexpensive pairs around a large or X-large. That way you get an idea on the fit. But the size charts are always there to help you.
    Thanks for the help! Should I start off simple or go more pretty and stylish?

  24. #24
    Silver Member Micki_Finn's Avatar
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    Whatever you want hon. Nobody is going to see you in them (except maybe SO) so it’s up to you. Whatever you want.

    Also, as far as sizing, most websites will have a sizing guide. Learn to read those and you’ll be fine.

  25. #25
    Hellion on Heels Kayliedaskope's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Emmmily View Post
    Thanks for the help! Should I start off simple or go more pretty and stylish?
    When in doubt, BOTH!!

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