How to accept yourself? I was going to tell you to see a therapist, but you covered that. You are battling an entire lifetime of toxic masculinity conditioning and don't feel safe letting it go.
First, looking at your avatar (that IS you, right?) You are much younger and better looking than I am. If I looked that good, I would ditch my male clothes forever.
Second, you are who you are. Your femme side has just as much right to exist as your male side. And it was gifted to you for a reason. I don't know what that reason is, for you or me, but God does not make mistakes.
Third, you were put on this earth to learn something AND to teach something. Again, I don't know what those things are; everyone situation is different. You need to open your eyes and look around.
For additional therapy, I suggest you go clothes shopping. They don't call it retail therapy for nothing! I have gotten an absolute ton of affirmation from the sales ladies who taught me how to pick me out the right clothes for me. And the better you are at putting an outfit together, the more confidence it gives you. You can go either dressed or drab, but I recommend dressed.
