There are many things people don’t accept and while it would be nice to know wherever you go to be fully accepted it’s not
going to happen. I do think more people do have the I don’t care attitude towards trans people but full acceptance prob won’t happen
Rachael
I can not speak and would not dare speak for the gay community but my personnel view is that I think if you asked them if they were accepted, the majority would say they are still more tolerated rather than accepted by society in general.Originally Posted by Micki_Finn
In our area, 100 miles, Toleration is barely in existence, let alone acceptance. My take is even what might be viewed as toleration is really just an extension of being politically correct...just don’t say anything. What appears as toleration can also be passive-aggression too. Discovery would not be treated as toleration. I think we’re light years from both toleration AND acceptance.
I live about a 100 miles from a city that has some level of acceptance and is tolerant, but I live 60 miles from another city that is not in any way accepting and not even tolerant. I have a couple of gay neighbors, nice guys great neighbors. They know nothing of my CD life and the people around here would be ugly if they knew.
I would say tolerance is more wide spread than acceptance! This may change in the future but I do not expect to see it in my time! Hugs Lana Mae
Life is worth living!
"Foxy lady! You look so good!!" Jimi Hendrix
If a person looks down on my crossdressing but still accepts it and does nothing negative toward it, how is that different from tolerance? Are we confusing lack of encouragement, lack of approval for intolerance/acceptance?
Exactly. This topic is pretty deep and from what I have read on quite a few posts in it, the view point is that of a TG, not a CD. As a CD, I emulate a woman, I enjoy doing so, I enjoy the clothing and the freedom of it all but honestly, it last for whatever amount of time I am dressed and isn't present when I am not. That's how I know I am a CD and not a TG.
"getting out there" seems more like a "support our cause" statement more than anything else. Like Steph stated, explaining your not transgendered, that your a crossdresser is far from easy when asked while your out there and actually may bring more hostility than tolerance, let alone acceptance.
Why would anyone risk family, friends, and personally well being for something that you do part time just to relax or have an adventure out as a woman? This is why I have always looked at CDing as more cosplay than lifestyle. You put the clothes on, you emulate for whatever period of time and then go back to being who it is you really are. Saying your TG when your not is just as bad as the way people treat you.
JMO
Flip Flops were made for Beaches & Bath Houses, We have neither in 2017. Lose the flip flops!
i read an article today about Amazon's search for a city where they can build their second HQ. The writer made the point that some cities in the running will have to prove to Amazon that it meets the Company's policies about, amongst other things, LGBT rights. So, unless we cross dressers want to consider ourselves as outside the LGBT community, doesn't this mean that we already have a high degree of tolerance and even acceptance within some of the major US corporations
So, I believe that we already have a high degree of toleration by society in the US and some parts of that society are also accepting. When I am in the UK I also feel that there is a high degree of acceptance. I see cross dressers and TG people out in public there all the time and for the most part they go about their business without fear, but there will always be some parts of a society that may never accept us.
Acceptance vs tolerance, I personally don't see much difference. A person can accept something and still not like it. Tolerance is a,more purely negative statement, to tolerate is an act or mindset to deal with something that we do not like or is disconcerting. Like tolerating the heat or cold etc etc.
Acceptance doesn't mean liking. If someone "likes" something then acceptance would not be an issue either.
Acceptance is more then just some knowing my name and saying hi. I mean like a friend of mine renting me a house as Jean . Hanging out with my best friend and her boyfriend. Her dad who I have met a few times asks about me all the time. My friend Mr K is feeling down and he calls me. At this house my two roommates and I put on a few party's . I was the hostess. I could go on and on. As I said this is my life.
My take on this is that acceptance follows tolerance, but either can only happen with knowledge. People react badly against what they fear and it's not uncommon to fear the unknown. Knowledge of cross dressing can only come when more people are exposed to cross dressing, but for many of us, me included this is a private behaviour. However, such exposure can carry real risks, rejection from family, friends, colleagues, society etc. But there can be benefits.
This is an ongoing situation and it is changing all the time. As has been said above, I'm not suggesting that we all turn up to the next BBQ in a dress, general society isn't ready for it yet.
But, when I look back at my young self and the world I grew up in, a world where I only came across two TG people in the media, to the world now, where most people are aware that we exist and are at least content with that, we've come a long way, I would say in a few short years, but in reality it's been a long time.
I think that a lot of these things are changed by the young people. There are TG children in many schools all over the place. Young people today, in increasing numbers, are growing and learning that those who are TG are normal people and not freaks. Such exposure, such upbringing can only help, but it will be a long time.
Me? I do my bit when I go out shopping. I shop in normal shops, I make no pretence that what I am buying is for anyone other than me, though I don't make a big fuss of this either. In this way, hopefully, more people can be exposed to the fact that there are men who like to wear ladies clothes and, at the end of the day, they're just a normal part of society that is trying to make its way in the World.
And, yes, I realise that how long this will take varies very much on actual location. Some places will take much longer than others.
I thnk one or the mistakes in this, is that for some who believe it is a choice, it's simply that they feel that while we may have always been transgendered, ts, tg, that we have the choice as to whether to express it or not. Pretty much everyone goes through their day, holding back things they would like to do or say, because it's something that they consider inappropriate. So they must wonder, why we feel free to express something which is perhaps the MOST inappropriate thing they could imagine. Society has always placed a great responsibility on men to behave in certain ways, and, express a great deal of self control. Insisting that we be allowed to do something they consider frivolous just makes them feel that we have no self discipline at all. And that is a disturbing thing to people in our society, because throughout our history it's been of utmost importance for the survival of cultures for their males to adhere to the rules, or that society could be overrun by another. After all, in a war we're supposed to dismiss any concern for self, and run headlong into enemy fire 'for the greater good'. Let's not pretend it doesn't take a whole lot of willpower to intentionally run towards incredible pain and what is most likely certain death. And in comparison to that, our fellow man thinks it shouldn't be any big deal to suppress the desire to dress up in girl clothes and think or behave like a woman. And they have a point. After all, this is why we're definitely seen as having what they perceive to be a first world problem.
See, everyone has problems. The rest of society just sees tg feelings as only one of many of ours; we have to hide what we are. Everyone has secrets, things they don't tell others. Women don't broadcast their intimate lady issues, guys don't go around talking about their crotch rot, and most who have psoriasis try to hide it. Have herpes? Do you feel the need to tell everyone you see? Of course not. This is our secret to hold, as they see it, a thing we should just not discuss or display. This is why so many are pissed off at us; they don't understand why we feel the need to express what we are, to everyone (hence the outcry about Caitlyn Jenner). And of course, lets not forget the ones who are latent gay/cd/tg/ts who can't bear the idea of seeing us, because it just reminds them of who they are, and they're trying their hardest to NOT deal with that!
We're approaching acceptance by a decent percentage, as long as we stay out of THEIR lives, despite that percentage who hate us. But greater than that, we still have to be concerned with the fact that acceptance doesn't change whether women will find femininity, or more accurately, the LACK of masculinity in men, sexually attractive. Women are attracted to alpha male behavior. We are the opposite. So even if they accept us, that's probably not going to get us out of the friend zones anytime soon. There will always be a few women out there, but no where's near the number for each of us to have our own CD enthusiast GF. The number of women who get all hot and bothered at the thought of a crossdresser is slim indeed.
Last edited by sometimes_miss; 10-20-2017 at 12:56 PM.
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
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