How I got caught in the worst way. How I survived.

[Kas]

Hey girls,

Just a word of warning. There may be some adult (sexual) content, but I will try to keep it to a minimum.

This is my first post. I've been lurking on here for the last few weeks and with such a supportive community I feel it is a good place to share my story of how I got caught (possibly in the worst way), how I handled the situation and what came of it.

So a bit of background info on myself. I'm 28, straight (though I sometimes fantasize about being with a man when dressed, so maybe bi-curious?), engaged to a woman I love very much and have a young daughter.

Now to my CDing... CDing has mainly been a sexual thing for me. At the age of 7 or 8, I remember becoming attracted to wearing female underwear. Unfortunately as I came from a family of 3 boys, I did not have access to any girls underwear so I would do things like find the smallest pair of underwear I could find and pulled together the back part to make it into a g-string which gave me a "funny feeling". At that point in time I didn't realise the feeling I was having we're sexual, but as I grew older obviously this changed.

(This is where the rating jumps up a notch)

So anyways, down the track a bit... Along with the CDing I also got into butt stuff. Never with anybody else, just doing stuff by myself. I loved the feeling of pretending I was the female in all the porn I watched, so I would often wear lingerie/panties/leotards/stocking (you name it) and film myself so I could watch it back later (BIG MISTAKE!). I even uploaded some videos (not showing my face of course) to some porn sites where anybody can upload to just for the thrill of the thought of other people being turned on by them.

As for my SO, up until a week or so ago she had no idea that I was even slightly interested in females clothing. We had occasionally done a bit of butt stuff with each other (a finger here and there), but only a couple times and it was never a big part of our sex lives. So anyway here's how I got caught. I was sitting at my computer after work playing some games as I like to do when my SO comes into my office. She says my name I turn around and she is standing there literally shaking. I ask her "What's wrong?", and she replies in a shaky voice, "What is the video on your phone?". I freeze. I know exactly which video she is talking about... It's me wearing a lacy black leotard, white stocking with little red bows at the top, trying out my new purchase... I couldn't believe she had seen it. My stomach sank.

She started to cry and asked again "What is the video!". I played dumb and said, "I don't know what video you're talking about!", hoping there was a slim chance she was referring to another video. She then continues to explain exactly which video it was and yes, my initial instincts were correct. I was BUSTED BABY! The things she saw in that video can never be erased from her mind I can tell you that for sure!

So what do I do? I fess up. I told her everything about myself and my CDing from when I was a young boy up until now. Many times during me trying to explain she would get angry and walk off but I would call her back, telling her we needed to discuss this like adults or it will wreck the family. She listens. And guess what! Mind blown! It turns out that the reason she is pissed off is because she was JEALOUS that I was having fun and doing exciting, adventurous stuff like that by myself and not doing sharing it with her! I jumped on the opportunity and told her I would love to do stuff like that with her and she told me I can wear or do whatever I want. I felt like a giant weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

So a week later and me and my SO are the happiest we've been for a long time. I am happy I don't have to hide things any more and she is happy that she knows something so intimate about me which she can share in. She has even offered me some of her panties which she doesn't want anymore.

I have also noticed that going through this has helped me evolve in my CDing too. Before where I found dressing to be mainly a sexual thing, I now don't see it as a perverted thing I need to hide and associate purely with sex. I can walk around the house in some tights and a slip just feeling good about myself being who I am! This just goes to show that no matter how bad you mess up, if your SO truly loves you they will accept you for who you are and there is no need to be ashamed like I was!

Thanks for letting me join this great community and sorry for the long post! I will hopefully post up a nice DP at some point!

P.S. I did not get caught on purpose. I had deleted the video from my phone but was unaware Apple keeps deleted photo for a further 28 days.