Does your girl friend/wife like or tolerate your dressing?

[LexiNexi]

I find most girls I have met either:

Don't like it. They say its weird amd really want their man to be manly. I can totally see this. I always tend to date girls that will wear skirts and I don't like it when they (or me for that matter ) wear pants. I always like my women to be really girly. I think thats why I like the "*******" pictures on the internet: They tend to be ultra feminine more so then regular girls.

They tolerate it. They don't think its bad but they don't really want to date girls or are attracted to feminine things.

A few (the ones we all wish or are lucky enough to date) gets some kick out of it kind of its like a fetish. I dated this one girl that liked me dressing up but only if she could do it. For some reason she said she didn't like it when she would come home and I was dressed up. This is what makes dating so hard for me. I don't like meeting people online: I can tell in 30 seconds 95% of what I need to know about you. How do you ask a girl out only to have her realize shes also dating someone else: We even give names to ourselves when we dress up; its hard to introduce two people at once and have them like two people. Its also hard to get them to realize its two sides of who you are and not just some perversion as most people (ignorantly) see it.

It would probably be best to meet a girl while you were dressed up. That way you know instantly if she likes it.

Realize that it can also be hard for the girl to tell her family or friends that shes dating a "crossdresser" or "insert label here". She might be afraid that people might think she is a lesbian or bisexual. Or even think she is some sort of pervert.

What I have noticed from watching the few documentaries I have seen like "My husband betty" is that most of the wives if I had to guess their orientation seem like lesbians. The better you are at dressing up the less she is seeing a man. I know I have no attraction toward women that never wear make up short hair and baggy clothes. Even if they are good looking. If you look and act 100% feminine you are asking her to be attracted to a woman. Would you still be attracted physically to your girlfriend if she altered her appearance to sound smell walk talk and dress like a lumber jack? Thats what you are asking her to do when you want her to be around your femself.

I once went out with this girl when I first met her she was so pretty and all dressed up. She was pretty just naturally. But I soon realized she hated wearing skirts, make up, or doing up her hair. I just couldn't get attracted to it. I had paid to get her hair done up and first thing she did was straighten it out and tie it up in a pony tail.

I had a point to all this but it escapes me now... Maybe try to realize that your dressing can be just as hard for her as it is you and that unlike you she doesn't have a choice in the matter. I could see that if a girl doesn't like my fem side the relationship would eventually fall apart.

[Dana44]

Lexi, My GF tolerates me dressing and even going out as two gals. But she is straight as an arrow. I wish she had some bi tendency. But like I said she is straight as an arrow.

[Joni T]

My wife is very accepting of it and doesn't have any problems with any aspect of it. She knows the man she married is and will always be here for her. It helps that I don't obsess about my dressing. Dressing does not dictate my life.
Jon

[Elizabeth G]

My wife tolerates it.

[kimdl93]

Which one and when? I suppose both did tolerate, when it was limited to underdressing and sexual play. Neither much cared for more overt expression. Tolerated it til it became a wedge in the relationship.

[Jaylyn]

Lexi at first my wife was very on board with my dressing to the point of helping me and showing me how to apply makeup better and always asking if Jaylyn needs any makeup when she bought it for herself. Jaylyn even got Christmas Presents. Then she just stopped liking my dressing and we've ended up with a DADT type marriage.

[NicoleScott]

Mostly indifferent. She's OK with it, but doesn't participate. She understands it's about me and my clothing, makeup, shoes, wigs, etc. that I enjoy in occasional dressup sessions. She's never spoken an unsupportive word about my CDing, which I take as somewhere between tolerance and acceptance, maybe silent support. She does like me to show her the finished transformation.

[Christie ann]

Not even a little tiny bit...

[nikkim83]

It cycles,

She hated it in the start of our marriage. 11 years ago.

6 years ago I was goimg to leave her so she got accustomed to it.

This year she is back to hating it again, but for different reasons now. We may end up in court soon.

[JeanTG]

Hates it. I haven't dressed since mid-summer.

[Di]

We met here at the forum and that's rare only know of a handful that has happened over all these yrs - so yes supportive wife here - that's my story

But going by what I've learned here


From what I'm told after all these yrs from other Ggs here and local - they met and fell in love and accepted that was a part of them- they were introduced to the girl side after there was a relationship and they had feelings already.

Whatever you decide I wish you luck finding love.

[debbeelee1]

I'm lucky, my SO fully supports my CDing. Actually, she used to buy me too much stuff. She makes jewelry for me and gets a big kick out of getting me two sets of Christmas presents, one for Debbee and one for Dave.

[Robertacd]

My wife tolerates it. Sometimes she is encouraging, sometimes she is ambivalent about it. But she is never mean, or discouraging about it.

[Beverley Sims]

I think you made a valid point illustrating how girls like to be feminine and you prefer them that way.

You show tha alternate side where you dislike girls wearing pants also.

You already have the answers and you will have to learn how to play the game.

If that is what it is.

[Diane Taylor]

When I was married my ex wife was somewhere between "like" and "tolerate". My current girlfriend is kind of in the same area.

[Rayleen]

She tolerating and accepting, and she said that I look cute....good communication helps.

[NancySue]

When I read about all the different relationships that exist, I thank my lucky stars that my wife is very accepting and helpful. I told her shorty after we met. I expected her to head for the nearest exit door, but she didn’t. It’s taken some time, patience, long talks, and honesty on both our parts, but it’s worked out. I always ask her opinion about my appearance. Because of our small town and the consequences of getting caught, she’s not totally willing to go out with me dressed, but we’re considering going out of town. I wear underneath, to some degree, every day.

[Stiletto Gurl]

My girlfriend is very supportive. She even purchases nylons when on sale for the both of us.

[Stephanie47]

My wife and I have been so heavily "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" that it just make me wish she would rant and rave about once a decade. She has knowledge but there is absolutely no intentions of my part to display my cross dressing. If I keel over and die one day I'm just going to have a little smirk on my face when she find my wardrobe which is hidden in plain sight. I hope she likes some of my 159 dresses since we do wear the same size. Over the years she has found a garment or two (bra or panty) which escaped my efforts to put away after a Stephanie day/week. And, there were those unbursted water balloons/female enhancements found in the kitchen sink!

When the issue first arose, "The Talk" she just about lost it. Crossdressing was definitely something she was not looking for in her ideal husband. She was adamant she was no a lesbians and did not want to live with a woman. She has some issues which predate my relationship with her which helped form her opinion. I choose not to upset her. It is interesting that she once encountered her father with his girlfriend going en femme to a Halloween Party at their Eagle's Club. She cannot remember it at all. Me. I was envious because he was having a lot of fun. It was totally a goof at the urging of his friend. I can only say, if your wife is totally opposed to cross dressing, but, your marriage is on solid ground, you should be able to weather the storm. Just don't rock the boat so the gunwales overflow.

[Shawn Michelle]

Not quite sure where my wife is. She knows about my dressing, and early on in the marriage she actually bought me a wig (it was an 'Annie on steroids' red curly thing, but I was just thrilled that she got it. She didn't mind that I traded it in on something a bit more mainstream). About two years ago, I told her I wanted to explore my Michelle side. Since then, we don't talk about it much. I'm not sure she's aware that Michelle is more than a 'fetish' thing, but something I feel deep inside. I'm not sure how she would feel if she knew I wanted to get a makeover and go out in public. I'd say we're at DADT, but I know I need to sit down and have a more detailed talk about where I am and how she feels about it.

[Confucius]

She tolerates it as long as she can set all the boundaries. That means only a few items are acceptable.

[HollyGreene]

My wife tolerates my 24/7 pantie wearing, but doesn't want to know about anything else.

[Jennifer2918]

It started off with me just wanting to wear nylons or tights (leggings). The grew into panties, which were for me to wear when she was not around; and never to bed. After a bit, I was able to wear panties to bed, but she would refuse to touch (and I do mean touch, no cuddling, just like 'don't touch me'). I went shopping alone and got my first skirt and dress from a distant goodwill store and my wardrobe has grown from there. I have a canvas style 2 drawer stacked storage unit, which she knows holds my nylons, leggings, and other items. She has allowed me to move my 6 dresses from this storage unit to actually hanging in my closet, but at the very end, behind rarely worn items. I do have a pair of sandals, which she does not know about, but those are kept in my car, hidden.
I would say it is a basic DADT relationship, but she is aware of some items.

When I do go out, she never asks where I went, what I did, or anything. When I have brought up the subject, she says she doesn't want to discuss it and changes the conversation.

[Vintage4sarah]

Nearly twenty years ago when she first found out about my CD desires she eventually tolerated it after some joint counseling. Over the following years, she has now come to accept that this is the long suppressed me and we can talk about it while she also gives me time to be Sarah. She still has not seen Sarah and I can live with that issue. We have been married for 46 years and have a warm family life. We are best friends that still share good times, extensive travel and similar interest.

[Jess S.]

I am one of the lucky ones wife is supportive.