Good ForThe Mind

[deebra]

Is CDing good for your mind? It fills a sometimes nothing to think about void up there, it's always between our ears, it brings a type of pleasure that nothing else does, it brings pleasure to some shopping in the women department and anxiety to other CDs. It's really cool presenting as a curvy, soft, attractive feminine woman, so different than a man. Every thing is different, mentally, physically and emotionally. Wearing the clothes, what a turn-on for us. And all the others don't enjoy this "extra" little pleasure.

Now for the others, they don't have the stress and sometimes the problems that goes with being a CD but don't we get more pleasure out of life than they do? Can you compare it with not being educated and not knowing what you are missing and being educated and enjoying more pleasurers?

Me, I'll take perfume over after shave any day.

[NancySue]

Absolutely is for me, too...mentally, emotionally and physically. I glean pleasure from every aspect of my dressing...even bad hair or makeup days. Whether underneath or total, I experience so many positive feelings. My wife recognizes this in me even though she views clothes as a necessity rather than a pleasure. She teases me about my desire and pleasures in wanting to wear things she can’t wait to take off...hose, underwires, heels, etc. My sense is there’s many many more of us around than known, especially once they’ve tried something on. I know several guys who wear pantyhose while hunting, cold weather, etc. My bet is they’ve tried other things too.

[Jean 103]

I don’t know if it is better or worse, but it is my life. I do know that I receive way more complements as a girl than as a guy.

Life would be so much simpler as a plain guy, though I would not have near as many friends, or be so popular.

As for the mind, I met someone last Wednesday night that turned my life upside down. I’m just now starting to get my bearings back. A GG that wants me to move in with her. My best friend is so jealous. I’ll tell you all about it soon.

[Tina_gm]

Now for the others, they don't have the stress and sometimes the problems that goes with being a CD but don't we get more pleasure out of life than they do? Can you compare it with not being educated and not knowing what you are missing and being educated and enjoying more pleasurers?

In answer to this question, no. You can take the most open minded cis gender male who would at best have the wonder or thought of what it would be like to live a day as a woman or the experience of dressing as one, go out and do so and then after that day knowing, would go on about their life as it has always been and prefer the after shave over the perfume. They will not ever get the greater pleasure in life as we do simply for the reason that it will never give them the pleasure it does for us. It would most likely be way too much effort without any personal gain. It would not compare to the non education and not know what they are missing because knowing, being educated would still not equal the what they are missing, because they would not be missing it regardless of knowledge.

[Pat]

I agree with Gendermutt -- No, you can't compare it with not being educated. It's more like not being left-handed. It's just a difference some people have. No amount of education is going to make a right-handed person change hands.

As to "us" getting more pleasure out of life than "they" do, you have no way of knowing that. You just know that you enjoy being yourself more than you'd enjoy being them.

[Tina_gm]

This is where acceptance really is key. And that is not just of the cis gender people but of us to them too. We don't have to accept any negative or hostile treatment by them to us, but we should be able to accept that they truly do feel comfortable in their world, whether or not we understand that world and that both they and we should not seek to reduce each others experience, merely to accept it.

[docrobbysherry]

Funny, Deebra, I've never thot that way. That I have it better than others, or they better than I.

I've always tried to do what makes me happy. Make the money to buy what I want and to live the life I want. And, I've always been grateful for what I have, my life, and the people in it. I can't recall after the age of about 15 thinking I would rather to be someone else.

Until I began crossdressing, that is! Now, when I want to become some woman I admire, I just DO!

[Teresa]

Deebra,
Now I'm coming to terms with my CDing I'm beginning to think I'm lucky to have the opportunity to finally live it, to really come to terms with it possibly takes a reasonable amount of intelligence, ( I hope I don't ruffle too many feathers in saying this !) To not only learn how to do it and all the associated aspects buy also how to deal with non CDers and people who don't understand our needs .

I get a great deal of pleasure from my painting but to do it dressed feels even better, dressing lifts my mind as you say not to fill avoid but to really get the inspiration flowing into my art .

Many talented people in the arts do appear to have something similar to us to draw on, maybe not as CDers, but many are Bi or gay that mindset appears to enhance their abilities .

Like others I wouldn't equate it to a level of education , that doesn't naturally follow , there are many people I admire in different fields that aren't CDers as far as I'm aware and I'm sure they wouldn't feel they are missing out on anything , in fact some would consider it an unnecessary distraction and a total waste of time .

You appear to be suggesting that the whole World revolves around our pleasure of CDing and if you don't dress the you are missing out big time !

[Tracii G]

You appear to be suggesting that the whole World revolves around our pleasure of CDing and if you don't dress the you are missing out big time !

Kind of what I took away from deebra's post too.
She feels one way and can't understand/accept that others feel differently and would want to have nothing to do with what she does.

[Sarah Doepner]

If I don't get the opportunity to meet this need, my mind becomes unsettled. The idea of dressing or something associated with crossdressing seems to lie just below the surface and can rise up an any time, day or night unless I'm engaged in some other activity that requires me to be focused. I admit there is plenty of very positive things I get from crossdressing. There is a different kind of creativity to work with and friends that I'd never have met. But there is a lot to it that eats up my limited resources of time and attention. So is it good for my mind? Probably not right now, I could be writing my novel or getting the basement cleaned out. I do admit I'm learning more about managing my time and finding more self discipline than I used to have. So that's a good thing, right?

Good or bad isn't the question, this is. How do I handle it to get the best results in my life?

[Jaylyn]

Lol Nancy Sue as I’m typing this on my phone I’m sitting in my deer stand and you guessed it I’ve got my panties n panty hose on underneath, and yes I had a good dress up day at noon before I left to go set an evening stand. I can’t see what I’m hurting by doing the thing that relaxes me and gets me in a peaceful mind. It’s my therapy for all the aggravating things in life.

[Tracii G]

Jaylyn that sounds great I would love to be in my hunting spot right now but its way too cold.LOL
It is very relaxing.

[Maria 60]

I guess to me it has different emotions, exciting, frustrating, distracting, overwhelming. I find at times when I'm busy at work and the mind is going into overdrive, I start thinking about dressing things, when am I going to again, what I'm I going to wear when the time comes, etc,etc. I feel it's a stress breaker but then I'm not getting my work done, so it becomes a distraction. Lots of different feelings I guess, but mostly good and if I had to do it again, I wouldn't change a thing.

[Beverley Sims]

Dressing definitely placates the mind.

[ToniG]

My Dressing does fill a "void" of sorts. Relaxing at home. Some anxiety when stepping out. Shopping is fun of course. Even when I was still working, would think about dressing when I got home. Would run machines, while contemplating whether my new panties would be waiting for me when I got home! Don't know, or think much about others. Don't have SO to worry about, so the concerns in that arena are gone for the moment. So I can Dress, or not. But its always a pleasure! Toni G..

[Becky Blue]

I think having Becky as a big part of me is a gift and I am very lucky to have her and to have experienced some of the amazing things that i have because of her and yes she is very good for me in many ways, on that I agree with you Deebra. But I don't think that the non dressers are missing out unless they have desires to dress.

[alwayshave]

I really love when I'm dressed, the swish of a dress as I walk, stockings on my legs and lipstick on my lips. The electric feeling is so wonderful and makes me relax and feel perfect.

[IleneD]

There's an odd dichotomy with CD life.
It seems there is always the general social stigma, and the negative vibes I get from those around me who don't fully understand or accept (incl wife who is still adjusting). There's conflict around CD.
On the other hand, in the last year or more since I started dressing up in full (beyond the years old practice of underdressing, etc.), and re-discovering my femme self, I have never felt more like a whole human being in my life. Thank God I CD, and have come to embrace this.
It was horrible all those years in denial. Lying to myself and others. Being closeted. Being a fraud and half of a real person. Now that it's generally over except for the outside social resistance, I do indeed feel WHOLE.

[deebra]

Pat maybe I do know non CD guys aren't getting as much pleasure out of life as we are. For 10 years I was married with kids and I did not dress or have time to think very much about CDing so I know what it's like to be just an average guy doing day to day guy things. And Teressa your last sentence is definitely credible. However I really, really like what alwayshave said, she said it beautifully. Do you know of a guy or GG that gets this much pleasure? And if you are thinking guys get equal pleasure from baseball, fishing, etc. a CD such as alwayshaved can get the same pleasures out of baseball, fishing, etc. PLUS the joy she described while in fem. What do you say about that?........Disclaimer: Who's to say who's right and who's wrong, really appreciate every body's thoughts. At least we all agree what gender underwear is best to wear!!! And alwayshaved, right now I'm fully dressed and feeling the electricity you described; has any CD ever been electrocuted from feeling like this???

[Pat]

For 10 years I was married with kids and I did not dress or have time to think very much about CDing so I know what it's like to be just an average guy doing day to day guy things.

I mean this with the greatest respect, but you have never known what it was like to be just an average guy. You know what it was like to be a trans person playing a regular guy role. If you want to argue that you are not trans but are a totally cis guy who just happens to routinely present female, then I'll withdraw the comment, but if you are trans, then you were from the moment you were born.

[Teresa]

Pat,
It's so good to hear someone else make that statement, I said it some time ago, when I believe it was a question about what is normal .

I replied at the time that I can only answer from a CDers perspective , I don't know what " NORMAL " is ! We truly don't know how different our thoughts are compared to a none CDer and possibly having a female trait and dealing with GD .

I now personally feel it's a good thing to have a different perspective on life, when all the shame and guilt has finally gone .

[IleneD]

Love your paragraph and your take on it all, Deebra.

[sometimes_miss]

I've never been comfortable shopping in the women's departments for clothes for myself, mostly because there's nothing there that fits me other than some underwear. So I do much of my shopping online.
Getting more pleasure out of life? Well, probably no. After all, there are lots of things I've missed out on because of being a crossdresser, as well as the other problems which also stemmed from being molested.
The only thing good for the mind, is all the problem solving that I've gone through in my life to figure out how to deal with all the difficulties I've encountered. Like playing chess, it probably helps keep the mind sharp. Perhaps that delays the onset of dementia, too; my elderly relatives who were active in mentally challenging ways didn't seem to lose much as they got older, where as those who lived a simpler life started to have more frequent problems with confusion and loss of cognition as they approached 80 or so.

[Dana44]

I also never knew what it was to be like a regular guy. I have always beat to my own drum. Been with many type A men and never understood them adnd they never understood me.

[deebra]

Pat & Teresa, hymmm, glad you said what you did, it's got me thinking as I sit here in panties.