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Thread: Beware

  1. #26
    Gold Member Kaitlyn Michele's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rachael.davis View Post
    I love the song "Caledonia" - prefer it done by Doughie McLean, it has a verse
    Made the choices needed choosing
    Lost the friends who needed losing
    and made better on the way.
    The song manages to be sorrowful, and joyful simultaneously
    Very nice...

    There is a song by Everlast...

    there is a line (about abortion in the song)
    but it really always stuck into my heart and mind...

    "God forbid you ever had to walk a mile in her shoes
    'Cause then you really might know what it's like to have to choose"
    I am real

  2. #27
    Super Moderator Jeri Ann's Avatar
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    Yeah, my choice was darkness or life. Non of the inhabitants of the world I left a few months ago understand that. Some of you here do. Thanks for sharing your perspective. It helps knowing that you are not the only one.

  3. #28
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    I am glad I finally read some common sense and honesty in a thread thanks for posting your thoughts Rachel.

  4. #29
    Member manemami's Avatar
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    Though i wish to come out, i fear even my own family will part away from me, due to this fear i am supressing my wish to express my famine desire. my wife allowed me to use panties and knows i wear bras but not intrested to see me wearing them even see dont like to discuss. but i am happy she accepted my wishes.

  5. #30
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    I think often the relationships we lose due to lifestyle choices were shaky ones in the first place.

    Another reality of life though is as we get older, our world becomes smaller. This happens regardless of any other factors. Remember being a kid and having so many friends and family? Remember also during holidays how you would have to go over for those obligatory visits to older relatives who were lonely because no one ever went over?
    Plus nowadays the consensus seems to be that people are becoming less social. Some blame social media and the web but that may just be a scapegoat.

    In my own life, about the only family I communicate with on a regular basis is my older sister. My brother is too busy with his own life, I had to cut ties with my step family (shaky to begin with but me being TG was the final straw). my ex and son are in another state, mom is dead, have not seen dad since I was like two years old, friends have moved on or the friendship just kind of faded away...

    We cannot deny that our being TG does affect relationships but it is only one factor and maybe not even the biggest one.
    It takes a true Erin to be a pain in the assatar.

  6. #31
    Living MY Life Rachel Smith's Avatar
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    Sorry I am so late to a party I started.

    Erin those are valid points that I hadn't considered. Thank you for shedding a new light.

    Teresa it is like trading one solitary confinement for one with a different description on the door. I have made some great friends behind this door but it's different then family. That's why Erin makes a valid debate.

    Thank you all for participating in this discussion.

    I do appreciate all the posts and have learned or re-learned some things.

    Hugs
    Rachel
    My parents should have known something wasn't quite right when I kept putting Kens' head on Barbies' body Rachel Smith May 2017

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC][SIZE="3"]Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want. Dan Stanford[/SIZE][/SIZE]

    I used to feel like one in a million now with this forum I feel like one OF a million

    “We must be willing to let go of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us.” ― Joseph Campbell

  7. #32
    Call me Pam pamela7's Avatar
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    Maybe I live in a different "world", but it is not all doom and gloom with relatives and friends. All of my many relatives on my own blood side have warmly accepted Pam and I have seen it directly in their eyes at two family funerals this year. The neighbours have responded positively to the news, and christmas cards reflect this. Even my homo/transphobic parents-in-law have come around to the point of wanting to meet - albeit after a year+ of disconnect.

    I feel sorry for those of you who are experiencing the loss of formerly close relatives and friends. Going forward, at least new friends can be known as real friends, because they will not care about the trans label, they will like the person inside.

    good will to all at this time of year

    xxx Pam
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJFyz73MRcg
    I used to believe this, now I'm in the company of many tiggers. A tigger does not wonder why she is a tigger, she just is a tigger.

    thanks to krististeph: tigger = TG'er .. T-I-GG-er

  8. #33
    Just do it already! DaisyLawrence's Avatar
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    That is great Pam, thanks for lightening the mood. I am pleased it has worked for you here in the UK. I bet that first meet up with the parents-in-law will be fun!?!

    Daisy.

  9. #34
    Member Tommie.'s Avatar
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    I can add nothing to the loss, pain and despair recounted above... it has all happened to me also going into my second year of transition. I miss my beloved Lydia of 43 years so badly I can barely type this... tears cloud my eyes... sorrow my constant companion. May God send His angels to us all and renew our joy..... please.
    Enjoy our new life and seek peace Give love and kindness to others Live patience, self control, humility each day

  10. #35
    Aspiring Member grace7777's Avatar
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    I have been fortunate in that my mother has accepted my transition and my brother and sister do not seem to have a problem with it. My mother is now telling other relatives about my transition, so there still could be negative reactions, but I do not see them often, so it would not hugely affect me.

  11. #36
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    Rachel,
    The other point some of us in the UK forget is isolation can happen simply because the size of the US , keeping in touch with family and friends on a personal level can be harder. In that respect we don't have that excuse in the UK, and I admit I'm guilty of not contacting my sister who only lives ten minutes drive away . I can't help feeling the proximity to other people makes it easier to come out and find acceptance , or is it more of the Brits way ?

  12. #37
    Living MY Life Rachel Smith's Avatar
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    Teresa,

    Must be a "Brit" thing. I am a 6 hour drive from where my family lives but with the exception of my parents we all have internet and cell phones, though my parents do have one of those. On my last trip to Pennsylvania I took a case of some micro brew along for my brother and he still couldn't spend 15 minutes with me though he like you is only a 10 minute drive from my parents where I was staying. I have one sister that hasn't talked to me since I started transition 4 years ago and a stepdaughter that has done the same in the last 3 years. I have one sister that talks to me when it suits her. On Christmas day she sent me a text and ask when it would be a good time to call me later that day. I replied 7PM. Well it is now New Years eve and she still hasn't called. I do however talk with my parents regularly so for me anyway the saying a parents love doesn't change though I know of many on here that have lost them as well.

    Go see your sister, sister.

    Hugs
    Rachel
    My parents should have known something wasn't quite right when I kept putting Kens' head on Barbies' body Rachel Smith May 2017

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC][SIZE="3"]Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want. Dan Stanford[/SIZE][/SIZE]

    I used to feel like one in a million now with this forum I feel like one OF a million

    “We must be willing to let go of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us.” ― Joseph Campbell

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