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Thread: Accidentally outed?

  1. #1
    Junior Member Stilleto Gurl's Avatar
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    Nov 2017
    Ottawa Ontario

    Accidentally outed?

    I’m just curious for those of us ladies who have been accidentally outed, how did it occur? Did you get caught by your wife showing up early from work, or maybe a picture on your phone?

    I have yet to be outed, but have had a few close calls. The closest was the day my girlfriends son showed up home from college and I was sitting outside in our private back lawn wearing toenail polish and lipstick and a woman’s bikini!! I heard the door shut to the garage and scrambled, smeared off my lipstick while wrapping myself in a towel like I had been in the pool. The nail polish, well he saw that. I told him my 10 year old daughter done hers and mine to match, which was a common occurrence back then.

    Whew! 😂

  2. #2
    Slip Into Something Femme Piora's Avatar
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    Jul 2009
    I've told this story before, in an old thread:

    When my daughter was living with me, she was not aware of my crossdressing. I had ordered my very first pair of shoes - black patent leather pumps, which I thought were going to be delivered by the postal service, and, since I live in an apartment, the package would be held at the closest postal depot, since they would not fit in the mail slot in the lobby. I discovered far too late that it was a courier service that was doing it. I tried calling them to see if I could pick up my package at their location, but it wasn't possible.

    So, they came while she was home and I was at work. I get a phone call from her, "'s some shoes here that just got delivered. They're um......ladies' shoes. Did you......order those?" I told her, "I'll explain when I get home tonight".

    When I got home, we had a long talk and I told her everything. She was very understanding, and accepting...which made me very relieved. I told her what had happened with the shoes, and we had a good laugh. My daughter is accepting, but she told me at one point that she doesn't want to see me dressed, or even any photos, which was just fine with me, since I didn't want that either. She is the only person who knows to this day.
    Last edited by Piora; 12-17-2017 at 09:47 AM.
    "Taking the time to be in touch with my feminine side"

  3. #3
    Senior Member Glenda58's Avatar
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    Aug 2006
    Down River Detroit
    A friend from work had barrow my chain saw to use. He had it for a few days. When he brings back I had been home dressing to go out later and was taking a nap on the sofa by the back window when he came back with the saw and put it the back yard like I told him to do. But he looked in the window and there I was. He never said anything about it but we didn't talk much after. But they did start calling me Glenda at work at times.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Western Washington
    Several years ago I was outed by a family of neighbors who invaded my privacy by snooping over the backyard fence. I use to eat breakfast and read on one of our backyard swing sets. I guess I never expected someone to peer over the fence. Apparently once one saw me the entire family started peering. I overheard them discussing me when I was out in male mode doing some lawn maintenance. I stopped being en femme outside. They were gossips and I am fairly sure they told other neighbors, but, none every said anything. I know nothing was ever said to my wife. I would have heard from her if she had been told.

  5. #5
    Junior Member Rebecca60's Avatar
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    Jan 2017
    Now that I have a grand daughter. She does my nails too. Funny my coworkers thinks that's awesome.

  6. #6
    The Girl will Out! Kaz's Avatar
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    Jan 2009
    Yorkshire, England
    I was outed in my family years ago... my wife found things and the when I thought the house was empty my daughter saw me (she is now cool about it all!). BUT... having seperated and starting off with a new partner, I was on a video call with her on Skype and thought it had ended, so dressed... I was in full line of sight (dressed, not dressing)... Been with her 4 years and still going strong!
    Kaz xx

    __________________________________________________ ____________

    This Woman Within is Flying without Wings

  7. #7
    Platinum Member Angie G's Avatar
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    Jun 2006
    just west of syracuse n.y.
    Almost got caught my my mom my son and my wife before she knew my other self. Never did get busted.

  8. #8
    Aspiring Member Sami Brown's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2017
    Dodge City, Kansas, US
    I had forgotten that my wife's grandson was coming home from high school early that day. I was sitting in the living room when he barged through the door, and then walked right in front of me to his room. It took me over a day before I could eat again. It was one of the most humiliating days of my life.

    My new blog: The Crossdresser Report

  9. #9
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2017
    Not so much outed, but when I was in middle school, my dad came home from work early while I was wearing a pair of my mom’s lacy, bikini panties and matching bra (nothing else). I was pretty sure I made it upstairs before he saw me, but a comment he made a few days later revealed that I did not make it upstairs in time.

  10. #10
    Silver Member Elizabeth G's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2016
    New England
    I accidentally outed myself late last year.

    I had been out during the day to do a bit of shopping and had a bag of my femme things with me. Unbeknownst to me the bag had tipped during my drive and a bra had fallen out. I got home and put the bag away with the rest of my stash.

    My wife and I were leaving that evening on a vacation with two other couples. As we were leaving in my wife's car to pick up our friends she asked me to unlock my car so she could get my jacket out, so I did. She then opened the door and just froze and asked me icily "Why is there a bra in your car?".

    I now had less than five minutes to try to tell her before we met our friends. We then spent the next 20 hours being unable to discuss anything while also pretending everything was just great as we made our way to dinner, shuttles, flights etc. Plenty of time for her mind to go to some bad places. Surprisingly we still had a nice vacation.

    This was not how I had planned it at all. We are still together and we continue to slowly work our way through things. Time will tell, but I'm optimistic.
    It's just the clothes... isn't it?

  11. #11
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2017
    Southwestern U.S.A.
    I guess you say I outed myself to lady I was seeing at the time. We were discussing future plans after I got through with my unplanned move out of state and physical ailments or something like that when she asked me something like, "Well, is there anything else I should know about?" You need to know, this was a pretty new relationship but, we seemed to be getting along very well and had a lot in common and liked a lot of the same stuff. And I thought, and later found out, she thought, we could have a pretty strong thing going on. After her question, I just blurted out, "Yeah, I sometimes wear panties or a panty and bra when I masturbate." Well, talk about a silent, lingering pause in the conversation.

    After leaving very shortly after that, I returned home and hung my head and called myself all kinds of stupid, dumb, etc. The next afternoon I received a call from her where we talked about it and I explained what I could and gave her whatever links I knew of that could explain what my hobby was. After I finally got moved and settled, there was some planning on our part for her to come visit, unfortunately, neither of our work schedules ended up allowing that. Through the years there have been a lot of phone calls, emailing back and forth, and her doing her own research into crossdressing, she has come to understand and accept that it is a part of me and always will be. And though she has said she does not want "to participate", she has occasionally sent me a link to an interesting item or sale and has given me some female advice on this and that.

    I told her am planning a future visit to a nearby relative next summer and she told me I had better come by to see her.

  12. #12
    Multi-Blogger Barbara Black's Avatar
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    Jan 2015
    Northeast Wisconsin
    I was surprised out in my front yard yesterday. It was after dark, sort of, and I ventured out, not seeing anyone in the immediate area. I was almost to my mailbox when a dog barked at me suddenly. I jumped and hesitated, but continued on my way since I didn't know where it came from and I was almost there anyway. Well, as I stepped into the light from the street light, the woman across the street and her dog emerged from the dark garage. I don't go out of my way to hide, and I'm sure that over a couple of years she must have seen me from her kitchen window. But if not, she surely saw that I was dressed from about thirty feet away as her dog barked at me a second time. I had on a straight cut blue mid-thigh skirt with a light blue, short sweater.

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Dec 2017
    North Carolina
    I came very close to being caught by my mother when I was young. I was upstairs in my sister's room trying on a pair of her heels when I heard my mother coming up the stairs. In a panic, I clumsily ran across the landing into my room, losing one of the heels as I went. As she entered my room, I slid my still heeled foot as far under the bed as I could. We had an awkward moment of silence, then she laid down whatever she was carrying and left the room. We never spoke about it again but I'm sure she saw the lost heel and wondered.

  14. #14
    Tara CD taracd25's Avatar
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    Dec 2017
    Fremont, MI
    My wife found out about my CD side by finding my locked box of dress up stuff down in the basement. I discovered it one day that it had been pried open and kinda bent back shut. Still had the lock on it though. I immediately got rid of everything in it and filled it with other random stuff just in case she had not actually gotten the box open. Well a week or so later it came up when she asked me about the stuff that was in it and why I had that stuff locked up. She just kinda dropped the subject after I came clean and it hasn't really come up again. She was not too happy about it though.

  15. #15
    Stop that, it's silly.... DIANEF's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    A few months ago I was sat at my computer, and completely distracted didn't notice my son arriving home from work earlier than expected, Key went in the door, there was no place to go, and in he came. I was completely en femme, the full works, blue dress, tights, auburn wig on, full make up. He looked at me, did a double take and I just said sheepishly 'surprise'. He was totally cool about it, bless him, and he said he was about to ask who I was before I spoke! Never pressed him on that about him really meaning it or if he was just being kind.....
    Here today, gone tomorrow....

  16. #16
    Aviatrix in Waiting Melanie Moxon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2017
    East Yorkshire
    About nine years ago now, I remember my mum questioning a receipt that she had found, normally I am careful and put the receipts for things I buy in my wallet so that they cannot fall out of the bag at home. Anyway, on this instance the receipt for a pair of ankle boots (now long since purged; charity shop) went in the bag from the store. I got home and sat in the living room with a bru removing labels and collapsing the 'offending' box for the boots, the receipt went on the coffee table to be picked up, where it remained.

    Sadly it wasn't a department store receipt, or from somewhere like Next where they sell mens and womens clothes, it was a womens wear only shop. I remember the tears and the anguish from my mu) and the anger from my dad about the fact that their son was a cross dresser, and "oh heavens what will the neighbours think". Unfortunately, it's all going to happen again soon when I eventually come out as trans; I'm not looking forward to it at all.

  17. #17
    Aspiring Member ToniG's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2017
    East Mesa Az.
    Have had Many close calls over the years,avoided any with the ex during the yrs that we were married. Did not dress much outside of motel rooms. A security note-keep those webcams covered up with elect tape when not in use- and don't have pics on your phones that can be accessed.! Unless you are already outed. Nowadays they can hack your wifi, or open your webcam w/o you knowing-- the hi-tech versions of "looking over the fence" Blessings.. Toni G..

  18. #18
    happy to be her Sarah Charles's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Utah, north of West Jordan, south of North Salt Lake & west of South Salt Lake
    Where to start? I was caught by my mother, not dressed but with all the evidence in place, almost caught by my step-father, but avoided that one, was almost caught by my wife several times before actually getting caught. But I don't count those as being outed, that takes another person to reveal information they shouldn't.

    In the last year or so I've been coming out to my kids and their spouses. I ended up letting my son's best friend move in when he needed a place to stay and he had been told about my crossdressing. I verified that he was aware and would keep it in confidence and we moved on. Eventually we were both comfortable enough that I would get up in the morning and dress. We would sit and have coffee and talk about the news or weather or how the other kids were doing, it was pretty normal. One day we had finished coffee and he went out to the driveway to work on his car and I stayed at the kitchen table working on my laptop. My late mother-in-law lived just up the driveway from me and one of her great-grand kids was living in the basement. So when my son's friend walked in I wasn't surprised at all, but when the other kid followed him in I was. He had asked if I was home because he wanted to pay rent and was invited in by the friend. Needless to say I spoke quickly and set the ground rules. He claimed to be willing to hold it in confidence, I don't know if he has, but since his grandfather is my brother-in-law and very, very anti LGBT with a bit of a violent history, I needed allies on that side of the family, just in case. That accidental outing turned into at least 5 other people in the family learning that I'm trans. They all seem to be supportive so far, so I'm lucky there.

    I guess if you dress as often as I do and have a closet full of clothes and all the kids have keys to the house, it's going to happen some day.
    Being transgender isn't a lifestyle choice. How you deal with it is.

  19. #19
    Platinum Member kimdl93's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Almost the Great White North...
    I recently wrote about being surprised by a neighbor couple delivering a gift of wine on Christmas Eve. But this brought back a Christmas outing some 4-5 years ago. I was casually dressed fully enfemme in a red sweater and jeans, when my youngest step daughter arrived with two of her friends. She had known for some time, but it was the first of several occasions when I met her friends while dressed. As young adults they seemed totally unfazed by my appearance and I guess the same was true for me.

    Easy come, easy go;
    Easy left me long ago...

  20. #20
    Member FrannGurl's Avatar
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    Sep 2016
    I may have mentioned my experience in a past post but not sure...

    I was caught by my exwife about 8 yrs ago after a party we had the weekend after the 4th of July.
    I had had a few drinks and was chatting with a few guys online. It was late and it was just my wife and her friend
    chatting outside after everyone had left.
    She walked downstairs and was standing right behind me and saw everything. Then was able to find pictures of me dressed.
    She divorced me and outed me to not just her family, but mine also, including my mother. My daughters know and are ok with it,
    in fact my one daughter ocassionally gives me her extra makeup and buys me things from Bath and Body works. My brother knows
    and doesn't talk about it but we are as close as ever. I think one of my sons knows but not sure.
    We were having problems in our marriage.I told her I was bisexual but liked men a little more than women but wanted it to work.
    The marriage ended of course and I regret to this day not being honest from the beginning. The interesting thing is she now lives with a woman in a long term relationship and is out to everyone

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