My first (actually fifth) time going out :D

[Keichan]

Hello Girls,

Not sure what overcame me in the past 3 weeks or so but I’ve summoned the courage not to go out once but five times in total! I noticed that 2 things helped immensely is that you do build up confidence the more times you do it and having a friend with you helps.

I was always in full makeup (probably with below average skills), clothing ranging from t shirt and jeans to a midi dress. Shoes ranging from heeled and non-heeled ankle boots to flats.

This first venture out was on my own and it was probably not a good idea? Not to mention I wore heeled ankle boots which made me even taller, I can say that I’m probably the tallest person there! I’m 6’1” in flats, weighing 132lbs. The heels made those clicking sound which caused everyone to look in my direction as it was an off day at a local shopping area. I’m the only one clicking! I still remember it was so nerve wrecking that I was tunnelled visioned into thinking every pair of eyes were on me (which probably was the case), and I couldn’t take my mind off it. I did my business (purchased some beer) and quickly back to my car and off I went.

The 4 other outings were with a GG friend whom I stuck to like glue! She had a fair bit of shopping that needs to be done so I was just there accompanying her. We shopped for things ranging from clothes, bags, shoes, jewelleries to supermarket groceries. We ate at restaurants and just did what everyone else was doing. By the fifth time (yesterday), I actually went out alone to meet her in town and I felt much better walking on my own passing people. I was still conscious of the stares but definitely not tunnel visioned.

Funny thing I noticed was the fact that most men looked bored and uninterested with all the shopping that’s happening around us. Mostly just sat in chairs and sofas that’s been provided by the stores, and I thought, OMG you don’t know what you’re missing out on!

I did notice that the more times I went out it became easier and the more I’m able to focus on what needs to get done instead of “OMG who’s staring”. Having my friend there I believe is the biggest help and confidence booster, it made me feel that she’s deflecting some of the stares and made me feel I’m a normal person. This is just how I feel, definitely not saying that CD’ing is not normal. Who’s to say what is normal in the first place! Anyway, that’s another topic.

The highlight was overhearing a couple say “Is he a guy or a girl” after I walked past them. That made my day because she had to ask the question. We did get 2 incidents with idiots shouting comments from their cars, but who cares about them. Oh and eating with a wig is a real pain in the butt.

I hope that my experience is somewhat useful for girls that’s considering going out for the first time.

I’m looking forward to going out again this afternoon for lunch. OMG what am I going to wear?!

[mykell]

congratz on the outings.....having a wing person is nice but goin solo gets easier after lots of repetition, had someone shout freak one time when in a mall, it just motivated me to go to CR and exchange jeans i had to buy online to get a cyber deal, so this was during the heavier crowds during the holiday shopping....smooth.....girls treated me like one of the girls.......it was very cool.

guess we will see plenty of stories of your future outings.....might have to go shopping to get more outfits if your out that much....

[ToniG]

It Does get easier over time! Have a nearby mall that I have been to several times w/o issues. Wearing items that blend in according to location and weather helps a lot. Most of the time,folks are concerened with their own stuff, or looking at their phones- not paying any attention. Just avoid groups of teenagers , as they seem to mock and comment with more viciousness. Walked to my bank and back enfemme today , and did a detour to avoid group of kids-went to other side of street. But its still fun stepping out , whether they stare or not. Happy New Year. Toni G..

[Xenia]

Congrats! Welcome to the "Out and About" club!

I'm totally jealous that you have a GG friend that you can share your trips with. I'm still fairly new to getting out and about myself. I'm not out to any of my friends as of yet, and my wife is not quiiiiiite ready to hit the town with me en femme, so all of my outings have been solo so far. Having a shopping buddy probably would have made things way easier and gotten me out the door years ago. Make sure you pick up the tab next time you two get together for lunch!

[Sami Brown]

Nice story! It sounds like you are getting used to being out quite fast. Thank you for your encouragement.

Sami

[Keichan]

Mykell – Thank you for the encouragement. I might be ready to go out on my own next time when I had groceries to do. I’ll probably have to wait a few months for the credit card to recover before I can afford more clothes, I had to purchase a handbag too on day 3 so I can stop borrowing hers. I absolutely love carrying it by bending my elbow, it’s just so cute.

ToniG – Yes I totally agree like what everyone here had said that blending in and wearing what everyone else is wearing is one of the keys. Unfortunately, I only have 1 girl t shirt. It's summer time here in Australia. Most of the time I try to look straight and avoid other people’s gazes which probably means I won’t be able to tell if I’m walking past teenagers or adults. I’ll be sure to avoid teenagers like the plague once I fully recover from my tunnel vision issue

Xenia – I’m only out to this friend and no one else. Well, it’s more like she noticed I was wearing women's shoes one day in guy mode and started asking Yes, I helped her carry most of the shopping and drove her around, paid for her first makeover session together with me. I jokingly said that we never get this much attention when I go out with her in guy mode.

Sami – Thank you for the kind words. Yes, I’m a little surprised myself because I’m usually a very shy and reserved person. The positive stories on this forum and my friend definitely made all the difference in having the courage to do this.

I definitely think after the "holiday" period ends, I might have to go out alone more often as we get busier with our jobs.

[Becky Blue]

You GO GIRL!!! well done keichan you rock!! I can so relate to so much of what you felt on your outings. Particularly seeing bored guys and wanting to shout at them that made me LOL... no stopping you now girl!! thanks for sharing your story, hopefully it inspires others!!!

[Krisi]

Congratulations on your outings. I'm sure there will be more in the future, especially if you have a female companion.

You learned about the heels and overdressing. When we go out as women it's important to look and act like women. We are often tempted to wear too much makeup, overdress and wear the highest heels we own. That's all wrong. Ask your female friend what to wear and follow her advice.

[Rosemary+]

Congratulations you rock, Keichan,
What a great read.
good on you for getting out there and living life!

[Stacy Darling]

Sounds like you'll be on your 100th by the end of the holidays Girl!

Have fun out shopping, and leave those men sitting bored in their seats, there no fun anyway!

Stacy!

[suzanne]

Lucky you that people need to discuss whether you are a man or woman. It means you are so much closer to passing than many of us, including me. That makes it all the easier for you. But the REAL key to successful outings is to behave as if what you're doing is no big deal. You're just you doing what you went out for with no fanfare. As your post suggests, it's a matter of getting out there enough times to get comfortable, and that's mission accomplished for you. Well done.

[lynda o]

Congratulations on getting out! It gets easier every time, soon you won’t give it a second thought. I haven’t been going out for very long, but now it’s at least once a week.

[Keichan]

Thanks to all for the kind words of encouragement. It’s definitely a learning process that’s continually evolving. All are much appreciated even if I don’t directly respond.

Suzanne – I always try to just look straight ahead and not trying to “check out” other people to see if they are looking or not. Easier said than done!

Lynda – Thank you for the tip, establishing a routine would definitely keep up the regularity and experience

[Kayliedaskope]

Dance like there is nobody watching ...


... because they aren't.
They're all focused on their phones.

[Teresa]

So good to read your story , yes I agree it does get easier.

One of my wigs is a pain to eat or drink in, it's only a cheap one and has stray hairs that go everywhere.

I posted a thread about a couple questioning my gender , until I got up and handed the local paper to the wife , the husband's expression was priceless.

[Christinne87]

Good for you! Sounds like it was a real blast! I still haven had the chance for a proper second outting as Christinne, but wish I had a GG to go with me!! Lucky you!

[Jenny22]

If not a GG, try to become a personal friend with a girl from this forum who lives in your area. Going out with another person raises the 'can do' bar really high. A forum friend who is a seasoned outer is wonderful!