Crossdressing Couple - Intro

[AmandaRaquel]

Hi, I am CD, married to a GG, who is super supportive of my CD'g, for which I am super happy and lucky! We are in our late 30's with two young kids, living in Westchester County, just north of NYC. I haven't been very open about my CD'g, and have to keep it a secret from my work in particular, and so only a few people know. This of course means it is very frustrating for me to have to keep suppressing this side of myself!

Lately my wife and I have been discussing how I can express this side of myself more comfortably, and possibly get out and meet members of the CD community, including those who have kids, to share thoughts and experiences, and also help us figure out how we deal with in-laws and kids potentially learning about my CD'g. We would for example be interested to host a CD event at our house, but are nervous about how to do so in a discreet and safe manner.

Does anyone have any advice? Or past experiences? Thanks!

[Jaylyn]

Your a long way from Texas for me to give you advice but welcome to the forum. I know there are folks here that will be able to help you. Enjoy reading the old posts on here I did when I started and learned so much. This thing we do is very complicated and with the help of this site it has made a little sense to me why and how to cope with the CD. Once again welcome and there's even places your wife can go to understand the whys of our dressing. I do know if you have an understanding wife the dressing can benefit the both of you.

[Sami Brown]

I think you should first concentrate on meeting other crossdressers in your area. Once you have a solid relationship with some of them, you can explore having get togethers at your house. Some of them may already have experience doing this, making them a great source of experienced information.

Good luck!

Sami

[Aunt Kelly]

Hi, Amanda, and welcome to the forum.

Party's attract attention. Unless you live in an apartment complex where there are already lots of cars, the sudden concentration of strange vehicles will invite attention all by itself. It's a safe bet that many, if not most of your CD guests will be made by anyone looking to see what's going on.

My suggestion would be to find a suitable venue away from anyone's home, or personal CD'ing "no fly zone". You know, in an area where neighbors or coworkers might be encountered. At you even in Austin, back in November, we rented a hotel suite that featured a comfortable living room to host things. It was perfect, if a bit small for any parties larger than a half-dozen or so. Anyway, you get the idea. Use your imagination. There are several communities represented here on the forum that hold regular (more or less) "girls nights out" (GNO's). Finding a friendly (meaning "wants your business) venue should not be too tough.

Good luck. I hope you are able to put something together.

[AmandaRaquel]

Thanks for your advice. I know the group in NYC does that, but with two young kids, its hard for me to get away that far. Maybe I am being dreaming/hopeful that we'll ever have time to actually do it all!

[greeneyes]

Welcome to the forum! So glad to have you both! We have a house full of teens so I understand your desire to want to "Do it all" but not have the ability to. It can be very stifling and frustrating! Just continue to have fun. I think you should first find a group of people you mesh with before you start bringing anyone to your house. You really should try to build some relationships with people first.
I have 2 disabled children as well, so getting away can be difficult to say the least. But we do. I have hired a few sitters so I have more than one to choose from, and we are finding interesting ways to get out of the house undetected! LOL.
Find a group in your area, arrange a date night. Get a hotel room if you can..so you can change there and meet some people!
That is my advise, for what it is worth.
Greeneyes

[Alenko]

I'm on the same page as you! I can't really find anyone in my own city. I'm sure they're out there? That's why I decided to try out this forum. Everyone's been really nice and helpful.

[Jackie7]

Hi Amanda, my wife and I are like you all, I dress whenever I want, and she thinks it’s fun, we go out together in nyc all the time. The only people I’m not fully out to are my grandchildren, at the request of my three grown kids. But we are older than you, and retired so there are no work issues. Good luck with your adventures!

[mykell]

hi amanda,
envious to say the least, especially the 30's part.

so this : https://www.google.com/search?q=West...firefox-b-1-ab

and i run a meet-up so try that

and i found this : http://www.loftgaycenter.org/

having events at your home can be risky depending how they are organized, insurance for gatherings, if you charge in my state you would need that.....anytime you make it down the shore look us up....

[AmandaRaquel]

Thanks all for their support and advice. I am thinking a good first step for me may be to join the NYC group, even if its a bit far for me to really be active, and at least get out and explore that outlet, and see if its something I really want to do. It's a little nerve-wracking! Maybe there will be some people there from Westchester to connect with..... Thanks again, all!

[audreyinalbany]

I seem to recall that there's a group in Poughkeepsie

[CDPheobe]

Hello AmandaRaquel. Welcome to these forums. Glad you and your wife joined to chat with us. Wife and I are members with teenage girls. We are from California and I have asked my wife to hang out with like-minded couples as well to hang out. Shes all on board with the idea. Nothing more, nothing less.
All I can really say is keep coming back and see where it goes. I have not met anybody in person or gone out with my wife while dressed except once and that was fun because all we did was go to Mc Deed for coffee. She drove. I did get out and throw some trash away but that was the extent. I love wearing makeup and dressing partially at home. My girls always see me in shorts and pantyhose and don't think anything of it. As far as us going to NY, I couldn't say we could anytime soon. Would like to meet you both someday if possible. Take care and come back.

[AmandaRaquel]

Thanks for the messages and warm welcomes, and ideas. I also found a good thread here on CD events - many fun ones. Wish we could get a babysitter for a few days or whole weekend to attend the Diva Las Vegas! It sounds like such a blast... alas, I may have to wait a few years yet. I linked up with the NYC CD/TG group ... now the challenge of synching work schedule with one of their events.

[FemmeMonique]

Hi Amanda. I'm in the NY Metro area; maybe we could chat by private message and figure this out.

Looking forward to hearing from you.

[CONSUELO]

Welcome to the forum. I think it marvelous that you have such an open relationship about your cross dressing. i live too far away to give you any advice but wish you both well. Have you considered having the two of you go to one of the major cross dressing events. You are not far from Providence where they have a big event every year. This would give you a chance to be more open and also give your SO an opportunity to see the wider CD community. You may also meet people who live not far from you and select those with whom you would like to develop a closer relationship by having them come to your home. I would think that you would only want people whom you like and trust to come to your home.

[ClosetED]

Welcome both of you to the Forum! We love to hear about accepting GGs and those lucky CDers to have found one!
My kids are all adults so a different life stage. THere is a group on FaceBook called FISH-N.E.T.S that tries to arrange social activities for TG people in the New England area. I joined but my wife is currently not accepting so I have not gone (out of respect to her fears of her reputation), but there may be a similar one nearer you. I have gone to a few meetings of a support group and know they do often have dinner together at a restaurant that is tolerant. Maybe a large hotel suite with the cost shared for the day by all invited might be a safe place.
Just coming here and sharing has been fantastic to share my hopes and fears with others. I started off only posting my lower half, but now have over 700 posted pictures.
Hugs, Ellen

[Dana44]

Welcome to the forum Amanda.

[AmandaRaquel]

Welcome both of you to the Forum! We love to hear about accepting GGs and those lucky CDers to have found one!
My kids are all adults so a different life stage. THere is a group on FaceBook called FISH-N.E.T.S that tries to arrange social activities for TG people in the New England area. I joined but my wife is currently not accepting so I have not gone (out of respect to her fears of her reputation), but there may be a similar one nearer you. I have gone to a few meetings of a support group and know they do often have dinner together at a restaurant that is tolerant. Maybe a large hotel suite with the cost shared for the day by all invited might be a safe place.
Just coming here and sharing has been fantastic to share my hopes and fears with others. I started off only posting my lower half, but now have over 700 posted pictures.
Hugs, Ellen

Hi Ellen, thanks for the suggestion about the FB group. I haven't created a FB account for myself as "Amanda" yet, but will check out their page. I am a bit scared that someone will recognize me, and use it against me. The suggestion for the hotel room is a really good one, and seems one that is recommended by several people here. The advice has been very helpful, thanks to all! I am glad to hear this forum has been helpful to you also!

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Welcome to the forum. I think it marvelous that you have such an open relationship about your cross dressing. i live too far away to give you any advice but wish you both well. Have you considered having the two of you go to one of the major cross dressing events. You are not far from Providence where they have a big event every year. This would give you a chance to be more open and also give your SO an opportunity to see the wider CD community. You may also meet people who live not far from you and select those with whom you would like to develop a closer relationship by having them come to your home. I would think that you would only want people whom you like and trust to come to your home.

Hi Consuelo, yes exactly. I am looking into a few events, and sleep training the baby in hopes to be able to attend something this year!

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Hi Amanda. I'm in the NY Metro area; maybe we could chat by private message and figure this out.

Looking forward to hearing from you.

Hi Monique! I am going to try to attend one of the CDI Wednesday night events as soon as my schedule allows. Do you attend? Looking forward to meeting you and others there soon!

[Rhonda Darling]

Amanda:

Welcome. You'll find lots of friendly folks here, and lots of great advice.

For your particular issue, I strongly suggest that you join meetup-dot-com and search for CD/TS/TG groups in your area -- there are many groups out there and you may find one nearby that would give you the opportunity to get out and meet others. Here in the DC area we have a group that is now almost 1,000 strong. We have dinners, Soirees in the open for all to see public spaces at local hotels, various special interest events, and lots of mutual support. Once you know and trust several local CD women, you might want to start your own meetup. We are out there and we are everywhere.

[Julia Welch]

Hi Amanda,

I can't really give you advice about venturing out as I've rarely done it in public. I am however, a Westchester resident of North Salem. If you'd like to meet up sometime PM me.

[Sallee]

meet up or support groups exist I am sure in your area but it is still hard to meet others. I live in a large urban area too and I don't know any other CD's I know they are out there and I see them when I go out to bars because I know where we congregate. I would love to me some that we can go to coffee or shopping together and even take turns on who gets to be the girl. I did that when I lived in Denver. It was fun Denver had a good group that was pretty open among themselves.
Some of the bars we frequent here in SD are a bit on the sleety side but that's OK. I go out ijn the day time and would love to meet some others for coffee or lunch in the day time. Those folks just don't seem to exist. Good luck

[tammy1]

Welcome Amanda. You've come to a great place to share. I am in a similar situation as you. My wife is supportive but most of the time prefers that i dress while she's at work. She is very supportive and understanding but prefers to let me have fun and dress on my own, with the only exception being when we are at a week long festival in Nevada around labor Day. WE live in a small rural area so being able to dresss and get out is "out". We live in a "no fly zone". Being retired, I have plenty of time to dress and enjoy, but i'st not the same as sharing and getting out with theg irls, which I can't wait to do. So my wife is encouraging me to attend a convention or find a weekend getaway where I can meetup with other ladies and have fun. I would prefer to get out to a gathering for ideally the better part of a week but will linitially have to settle for a 3 or r4 day weekend. I am relative new to this site as well and have started to make a few friends; you will too. Ellen (ClosetED) has a welth of informmation and has copnnected me with Sherry (doc) who has attended several conventions. This is something i am looking forward too participating in. Private messages have proved to be helpful as well, but you'll discover that the many threads on this site will probably provide you with tons of insite and great information. Have you and your wife considered getting away for a weekend (away of town and people who night recognize you - I'm in the same boat from by previous retired employment)? Think about it, if your wife is open to the idea, you can both go out a girls, have dinner, shop and possible do it all within a larger hotel/resort and never even venture onto the streets if you prefer. send me a message and we cant discuss more...

Tammy

[Sissy_in_pink]

Hi Amanda
I belong to a group here in Sydney Australia Called the Seahorse Society. It was started back in the early 70’s by a Crossdresser that found a need for a support group for like-minded people.
Social meetings are held in a council ran Hall once a month where different activities are held, we also have themes where members get to dress up to match the theme, then judged by others members and the winner wins a prize.
Meetings cost $7- per member and this covers nibblies and none alcoholic drinks on the night.
Members can bring partners and friends to meetings.
We also have a web page with lots of info to help crossdressers, but unfortunately our web-mistress who designed the web page passed away taking the pass word with her, so our web page is way out of date.
http://www.seahorsesoc.org/
We also have a Formal Ball held once a year in a posh hotel near Sydney Airport.
As well as a Christmas party every year.
If you are going to get other crossdressers together I would not advise doing it at your home or you might attract unfriendlies, I think the best idea is to start with a web page, get some members together and decide on a meeting place, but don't give out any personal info like your home address or phone number, use only your femme name and get a special email address just for crossdressing activities and don't advertise where meetings are held on the web page, give that only to members.
I hope this helps
Cheers Rhonda

PS if you have any questions don't hesitate to ask, I'll answer as best as I can.