I thought you said you had a problem??? I would give anything to be in a situation like yours!
Just talk to her and go with it as far as you are comfortable and be sure that you are both open about what you are wanting to get out of it. I'm sure that you will find that you will have a fantastic time and it will probably even strengthen your relationship in the long term.
Hugs,
Paula xxx
Living on the edge might be dangerous, but it has an awesome view!!
It sounds as if you have certain personal needs that are satisfied by crossdressing. Your girlfriend is also expecting to satisfy some of her needs through it as well. However while you crossdress for comfort, her expectations are different. I'm not exactly sure what she wants. You need to have a talk with her about what she likes about crossdressers, and what kind of fantasies she may enjoy. Let her know that you appreciate her support for our crossdressing, and try to find a happy place where both your needs and hers can be reached.
I am not married.
I'm intrigued by the support the girlfriend is getting in this situation. I do understand the need for a supportive SO, and I have a lot of respect for SOs who make informed decisions to be supportive of CDing. I have concerns about over-supportiveness though.
We talk about taking it slow with the SO from our side, but if the SO puts the afterburners on and makes the CDer uncomfortable, that seems to be OK according to some (?). I agree with those that have suggested trying to reach a compromise or similar. I am also of this opinion.
I also have concerns about pressure put onto a CDer into a direction in which the CDer does not want to go. I would kind of understand if it were motivated by safety, decency, reputation, etc, but that isn't the case here. I am not married; so these are my questions:
1. Is a flood a valid solution to a drought?
2. The GF pressuring for more sexy is getting a lot of support. Would a girlfriend trying to put a stop to sexy get the same support?
- Lydianne.
If you pass how could you not want to go out and dress sexy? Hadn't you rather look at a sexy woman than a plain one?
I would try a set of forms, they are fun. I am sorry that she on occasion has laughed at you, let her know that it bothers you, she will probably stop. You are in a rare situation most here would love to be in; I hope it works for youTake care Brenda
A little confused on your build but being the same size as your girlfriend and I'm curious how you let her in on your dressing? I need more pieces of the puzzle to fit for me to better comment. Also you oddly mentioned being an adult...hmm, how old?
Hi Ericka, Are you bragging or complaining , A lot of us should have your problem >Orchid ..o
o..
Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~...
I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !
If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.
Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!
Lydianne, you raise some good points. Flood or drought, communication seems like the best solution.
I am a vessel of the goddess. Let me express my calling to a feminine life through nurturing love and relatedness.
Sorry iam getting back ao late. I even before I became a member. I would read the fourms maybe once a month or so. Dont take as a bad thing if I go missing. On a fishing fourm I use to post on daily. I go missing for a month their, and people are filling a missing person report .
I am 32 and have been dressing since i was 12 or so. Pretty munch stopped intill about 2011. Then I will admit i went a bit over board, but now with me wearing some thing fem almost every day. Its just normal clothes to me.
How I told her was pretty easy. She grew up in a very liberal family, and has gay family memebers, and a friend that has a little boy. That dresses as a girl all the time. When I decided to tell her. I was starting to care a lot about her. I figured she needed to know, and i told her. All she said them jeans you wear wearing on our second date. Were they girls jeans? I then told her yes. She then says know I knew why I liked them. I would wear them.
I have admited to her I would love to wear certain things, and I have a few dresses picked out. That I will show her on sunday, and she what she says. Maybe in the summer when i am not working as munch we can have a girls weekend, but this time its all about her, and what she finds sexy on my. We have all ready found out its not stuff that is usally worn in only in the bedroom. Its clothes like dresses and what not. Stuff she never sees me in.
Erica, welcome to our forums. Well you have an advantage. A willing woman who sounds like she really cares and loves you for you. If shes willing to see you out in public, GO FOR IT! My wife wants to go out with me and have done so once. We just dont have the time due to kids and work schedules. There are plenty of worries but those will work themselves out. Again. you have a willing girlfriend. Go with the flow and let your girlfriend help you out. That opportunity comes once in a lifetime.
Formerly CDGigi
Communicate! It’s always easier said than done. From my perspective, you love dressing in a certain style, and your girlfriend seems to like a different style. When she selects outfits for you (which you don’t necessarily like), and then chuckles, it’s only natural for you to get uncomfortable. Tell her that! Tell her that you want to dress together, you want to look amazing, and that you don’t mind going out while dressed. But just like any other girl, you need some positive reinforcement and compliments and not chuckling which could be perceived negatively.
Personally I would be happy to be in your situation, my wife and I our mostly DADT, so if she came home one day and said let's make you a sexier girl, I would gladly be open to pretty much anything. Maybe establishing some boundaries that each of you are comfortable with would be a start, good luck.
Sorry to bumb a thread, but is my own thread. I hope thats not so bad.
The girl friend I talked. It was a communication break down. She said she is happy with what i am comfortable wearing as long as I am happy. I just know next time we go out. I will be more ready compared to the last few times, and willing to dress a bit sexier for her.
I am also working on a few things to have some free time, or at least allows me to quit my weekend job. So we can enjoy a weekend together. Even if all the cards fall right this week. We wont be going out intill summer. As i would like to grow out my hair a few more inches, and get it styled. Maybe even my make up done by a professional for a night. So the girlfriend has less to worry about, and so we can just enjoy the night out.
I'm going to just skip a lot of stuff and jump to the point:
If you are going out in public wearing dresses (sexy or not), you are going to need breasts, butt and hair. A man in a dress looks like a man in a dress, period. Buy yourself a good pair of appropriately sized breast forms. Buy your self a good pair of hip and butt pads. Buy yourself a realistic looking wig.
Learn how to shave and cover your beard shadow and learn how to select and apply makeup.
Note: Buy your breast forms and hip/butt pads before you buy your clothes. What fits without the padding won't fit with the feminine figure you are creating.
Krisi
I have been out a few times all ready. Have the long hair all ready. Just want it a few more inches longer, as for breast. Iam naturally a c cup. So a push up bra dose wonders, but i have been thinking about getting fourms. I even all ready have the butt and hips. Maybe not like a genetic woman, but I do have them.
Ericka, I would tell her to how you feel. but if she wants you to be sexy, why not her help you do that.
Part Time Girl
We're going out again. There is no doubt about that. I am just waiting for a few things to fall right.
The first should fall in to place this week, or later next week. Once that happens. I wont be working as crazy as I do now. I then will be able to take a weekend off. Every now and then.
The second wont take place in july or August. I am moving in with her, and her sister we hope is moving out. So it will be easier to dress.
The third her health. She had a major concussion in September. While shes far better. She still will get a headach once and a while. So I dont push her.
While she hasnt seen the girl friend since last july. If just the first two fell in to place. Which they should. We could easily just go out, or just go out around town, but in a town with less then 50k people. There is not a whole lot to do.
So unless we go to a bigger town. I dont know if its worth it. To spend a a couple of hours getting ready. Just to go a dinner and a movie, or the lounge around the house.
I know it will happen. I am not pushing it, or need to do it right now. I mean for crying out loud. Iam usally fully dressed the way it is. Just minus the bra, makeup, and we are both ok with that.
As long as she sees the boyfriend more then once a month. The girlfriend can come out and play. Once and a while, and i am ok with that. Some times its kind of nice. Just being a man. I can wear sweat pants vs tight jeans. Which she loves my butt in. I can wear sneakers vs 2-4 inch heels. I dont have to worry about presenting my self a certain way as a man.
Yes i know i hit a gold mine with her. I dont plan on letting her go. I loom foward to many other adventures with her. Both as the girlfriend and boyfriend.
Erika, It's your life and don't be pushed into anything. Truth is that most of us are more manly than we wish to be and it takes years to find female clothing that looks naturally feminine on us, as this is what we strive to achieve. Long lose sleeves hide manly arms. Having breasts, whether forms, or pushing up what we already have to create a visible cleavage immediately helps others to identify us as female. In your case, being seen as female may not be what you are looking to achieve. I have friends who are very happy appearing to be feminine guys. We are all different and I am sure you will find your own way forward. Just enjoy being who you are. G xx
Longe hair, natural C cup, some butt and hips... I think you can look pretty well...mind some pics?Originally Posted by Ericka_d
Darn girl I hate when that happens "My GF want to make me wear something sexy." I can only dream or is it fantasize.
What can I say enjoy your terrible luck and show off that sexy side. Next you'll be saying she wants to play with you to much
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Sallee
Amazed by the similarities in my own relationship though the opposite in roles. Always wished for my SO to dress sexier as she has the figure for it. Never was interested and never will has been the reality of our long term DADT relationship. Erica_d point of view is understandable, as "biker chic" or "glamour rock" is a mentality that either is or it isn't. Long ago I quit asking, as you got to want to.
I have a feeling about some thing, but this could be me just guessing. I think some are thinking about the bed room. Sorry that is a no. That is a hard limit for both of us. I have never had the desire to wear it, and she has no desire to see me in it. For me any way. That is one thing fem thing i dont have a interest in.
I think though with her there is more to the dressing sexy thing. Then just her saying i dress like prude. She is a bit bi, and she checks out woman more then me. I cant tell you how many times she will tell me you see the breast, or butt on that girl. No its not the normal see how big they are. They cant be real type of talk. Part of it I know she wishes she had that set of breast, or that butt.
I have a feeling she wants me to dress a bit sexier. Just not for me to embrace the girl side, but for her jollys also. Which is fine in my books. Lets be honest. Some times its fun to spice up a sex life. The first time She did my make up, and hair alone. She was ready to have some private fun. I even asked if she wanted me to wash it off, and she said no.
That’s really a good problem to have. My wife told me during a heart to heart a couple days ago that she’s into girls, but not vaginas... and that she wants to show me what she finds hot. I’m REALLY excited. Enjoy!
Since you have a girl friend who not only goes along with your CDing but likes it you should do a little something for her. If she wants you dress up a bit I think you ought to at least to some extent or around the house. Or maybe one night a week is "dress up" night. Find something you can both enjoy and maybe after a while you will find you are ready for a little more or enjoy it more than you thought. Sherrii
A lot of people are envious of your situation. Me too. If you have any doubts about the tension between the type of clothes she likes to see you in and the types that actually look good on you (ideally, they would be the same, but maybe they aren't), why don't you go dress shopping on your own, and get some serious pointers from an experienced sales lady. Not the ones who tell you everything looks good on you because they have a sales quota to meet. Try to find one who will flat out tell you "No" when it doesn't work, because that proves that yes really does mean yes.
About the arms or any other body part you find are less than feminine. All women have parts they like more than others. There are ways to accentuate your positives and camouflage your negative traits. Don't be afraid to get advice. As an example, my arms and shoulders are BIG. Long sleeve dresses won't even go over my arms and short sleeve or sleeveless dresses make my shoulders look apelike. So I always cover up a bit with a cardigan or bolero. It allows the eye to be drawn elsewhere and it works.
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