In 2014, this was put in in the 'helpful links' sticky for TS people. For those of you who have wives or SOs that have a hard time accepting your dressing, you may suggest that she read it. It could change her whole outlook.
http://avitale.com/developmentalreview.htm
With the abstract using terms like “disorder” and “treatment” I feel offended and don’t care to read any more. I’m
not disordered and in need of treatment. I feel personally affronted that a PhD professional, who has influence over how minoriies are treated and referenced in the english lexicon, can demean us in such a way.
Well said, Allison. Couldn’t agree more.
This was written in 2001/2003 and is reflective of the time! If you would read the whole thing in that context and not be so thin skinned you might be able to sift out some truths in the article! No, I did not agree with everything he wrote! Hugs Lana Mae
Life is worth living!
"Foxy lady! You look so good!!" Jimi Hendrix
I thought it was a good read. Allison & Nancy - I understand your frustration, but I thought it shed a lot of light on my particular situation regardless of terminology.
Lana Mae and Lizzie, because you found positives in the article and I may have rushed to judgement, I tucked my thin skin, put on my big girl panties gave it a read.
There were many comments of interest because the author had accurate insights on the behavior in our community. And if anyone found this article helpful in finding more peace and self-acceptance then I am truly glad for all it helped. I see how it may offer hope, better understanding, and guidance for anyone trapped in the wrong body.
I tried to get past the language used, Lizzie. But language is SO important in how it paints images, especially of minorities and how society en masse should treat minorities. It may be a 15 year old report, but I don’t excuse an alleged expert for marginalizing the subjects of their study as having this new “disorder that I named” instead of the disorder they named it. My history of reading psychological dissertations leads me to believe that most authors seek primarily to advance their own name. This article doesn't change my perception.
The author points out that HRT has a great track record for “treating” gender dysphoria (or at least treating the anxiety caused by the “disorder”). By the definitions of the article, I have mild to moderate dysphoria. I am glad that those with a stronger sense have a path that hopefully helps them.
My opinions are those of someone who crossdresses and does not feel the need to live as a woman. At least, I have never had that feeling and I don’t expect to, however much I do love and accept my feminine attributes and desires.
I’m sorry if my initial reaction may have steered anyone who may have been helped away from the article. That said, read it with the knowledge that you are not lesser than anyone and you deserve the right to walk your own path. And you also deserve all the help you need to walk it. Just my opinion.
Last edited by Alisonforme; 01-29-2018 at 11:25 PM.
Although its quite old I did find the article very interesting, I particularly found the stages of life very helpful. Thanks for linking the article Jenny.
A.K.A Rebecca & Bec
Interesting read. I could relate to some aspects in the "stages" as listed but reinforces my knowledge that I am not TS or that I have any "disorder". I have accepted my lot in life and how or why I'm who I am is no longer a need to play the blame game. Hopefully the understanding of the human condition grows as we become more main stream in society.
"you are a strange species and there are many out there;shall I tell you what I find beautiful about you ,you are at your best when things are at their worst" ...[ Starman]
It may of course be a bit disturbing to sense that one is really not so firmly anchored to the gender one was born into.
my girlfriend has "gender dysphoria", very upsetting what she goes through.
As for me , I'm just crazy and loving it
See all my photos, read many stories of my outings and my early days at
http://rachelsauckland.blogspot.co.nz
My skin is not too thin and I felt like this research was my biography. Wow, this gave me much needed insight into how I have conducted my entire life.
I sent the link to my very hostile wife in the most likely vain hope that she will understand me better and why at this late stage of life I feel compelled to address the feminine side of me I have denied for so long. It makes me want to have a good cry, but I'm so conditioned to be the man I never really wanted to be that I'm emotionally not able to.
[SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]
Thank you so much Jenny, I cannot wait to show this to my therapists.
Jenny,
Yet another theory on why we are like we are.
It made a good read and if you had not brought it up for discussion here I may never have read it.
For me all it does is add to the confusion, Ido not have any specific views, I just get on and enjoy life as it is put in front of me.
The paper looks like a thesis for a higher grade of learning at a university.
I give it a B+. :-)
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.
Pretty much any human activity beyond eating, seeking shelter and reproducing could be labelled a disorder- it all depends on your perspective. I think people who spend hours on social media and get all upset if they don't get many Likes have a disorder- but that's just me. I think people who spend their lives worrying what their neighbours might think of them have a disorder- again, that's just me. Society is run along conservative lines because we have overwhelming common needs, therefore anyone who sticks out from the herd is considered to have a 'disorder' and is viewed with suspicion. We are governed by a culture of fear. It explains everything.
I used to have a short attention spa
Fascinating read. Definitely provides some insights, and some confirmation that others experienced some of the same things I have throughout the various life stages. The paper falls down a little because it makes several sweeping generalizations. For example, it's true that I was really into sports in adolescence. But I wasn't forcing myself to be that way in order to suppress my GID; I truly enjoyed playing hard core sports and still do. And although the author acknowledges that gender is on a spectrum, she fails to honor that fact as the paper progresses. For example, she seems to imply that transitioning is the only resolution to ease anxiety, when in fact for many of us, there is no desire to transition, and simply being able to acknowledge and accept ourselves, and having greater freedom to express our femininity, serves to release anxiety and give us newfound happiness as we age.
An interesting read. Somewhat anachronistic and rather odd that the author only had one example from the "middle aged" cohort, given the preponderance of late bloomers (myself included) who find their way to this self selecting forum.
I quite like the idea of the proposed taxonomy, though I agree that "treatment" presupposes some underlying disorder, with which i don't agree at all.
Thanks for finding this.
J
Not all of us grow up to be the man we once thought we might become.
My candle burns at both ends. It will not last the night. But Ah, my friends, and Oh my foes, It gives a lovely light.
Anne Vitale transitioned 40 years ago, earned her ph’d around the same time in psychology and has been a gender therapist for 35+ years. She does not pitch transition as the cure all for everyone with gender identity issues. While some of the language has evolved since she wrote that paper, I found it to be incredibly insightful to my issues.
So I feel that I'm deprived of expressing my gender? I can relate. But, I'm a male too, in fact mostly male. This is kind of like the attributes of horoscope sun signs. Yeah, that Taurus attribute sounds like me!
I see things in both group 1 and group 3 that I relate to, but mostly I would be in group 3. Maybe I'm not in either group!
Comments form Isabella and Nikkilovesdresses and others above are interesting. The study does generalize, which it almost has to I guess.
"You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder
Remember, this is the Internet and anybody can be whoever or whatever they want to be on the Internet. This includes psychiatrists and such. And "news reporters".
Krisi
Agree. And to go one step further, I extrapolate from sociobiologist EO Wilson's work on ants. In that society there are extremely well defined roles. We see this in our society as well. It's how we evolved.Originally Posted by Nikkilovesdresses
Terminalogy is out dated but the terms we use today will be outdated tomorrow. I enjoyed the article as I found some of me in all the life stages. I will be talking to my counselor about the article Friday as others said they would. Overall thought is was interesting.
Jenny, thanks for the read. There's a lot in there that relates to me. And, a lot that doesn't. I don't get my panties in a bind because someone chose a word that is now out of favor. It's just terminology. Being different and deviating from societal norms and expectations is a challenge for anyone. A counselor I know is of the opinion that every man and woman has some DNA of the opposite sex. The pull is stronger in some than others. I'm comfortable with that hypothesis. The issues that arise is the conflict it may create with those around us. I have to remember the burdens imposed on me to perform in societal roles of a male are in conflict with my inner self. I also have to remember my actions are in conflict with my wife's inner self. Throw in societal norms and expectations for the husband and the wife and it becomes potentially one big mess.
Thanks for the read. Nice to read something once in awhile that is thought provoking.
I'm so glad that my post has been of significant interest to many. But wait .... there's more! Go back to the link, click on the author's name, and when that link comes up, click on 'about.' you'll see 6 other links (one not working) of value to those of us who wish to inform SOs with meaningful, possibly helpful information for the cause of (better) acceptance of why we are what we are.
Note .. I wrote to the author asking if she had any updating to the initial article based on advances in medical science since she wrote it. I'll share her response with you.
The title of the original post is :Maybe why many men dress as women. My thoughts are that we "dress as women" only because gender has been applied to various types of clothing. Same goes for hairstyles, accessories, leg shaving and other things.
At first I totally agreed with Alison but I gave it a chance and was able to relate to some of the points. But I liked reading it since I am still figuring this all out.
Thanks for sharing. It does generalize, and since we are all unique individuals, any generalization will have aspects that are off the mark for any one person. That said, it has some interesting observations and I can see a lot of myself in group 3. I also see a lot of general comments that I don't think apply to me. Perhaps I am in denial on some things, or maybe not. I found a lot of food for thought.
Thanks again for sharing Jenny.
I can tell you why I dress---I have a fetish for makeup and I dress to "escape" or take a "vacation" from my normal self and become "Not Me"-----All my concerns worries and responsibilities "melt away" and no longer concern me. I can totally relax and be free from any stress---with a little "fun buzz" to go with it.-------A bit different from most people here, but I think that MANY guys do this too.
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