This is one of those "if only I knew then what I know now" questions. With a much greater knowledge of both myself and transvestism and fetishism, I would hope that I had the good sense to do things differently. But what I have noticed is that being a fetishistic transvestite is not just a "condition" or "state", it is a journey. As you proceed along that journey you change and the nature of your transvestism changes and there is an interaction between the two that can lead to unanticipated results. We are not static beings. The atoms that make up your body today are not the ones that were there when you were young. You are in a constant state of flux and your emotions are in flux too.
So these types of questions are difficult to answer. For example I feel now that knowing about my desire to dress and appear as a woman most of the time I would not have married or I would have used the criterion of acceptance of cross dressing as a major one in selecting a mate. But what would have happened if I had met a woman who just bowled me over emotionally. Would the strong feelings of love and sexual attraction have overwhelmed my rational understanding that I am a transvestite and that I need to find someone who likes and accepts transvestites?