It's not what you think. This post is excerpted from my blog because I believe it is important to demonstrate to all what is possible out there, how you can indeed get out, be treated as a woman without fear or hesitation.
In my ongoing quest to get involved with events and become "just one of the ladies" I volunteered for A Prom to Remember (http://www.apromtoremember.org/), an organization that brings a unique Prom experience to teens battling cancer. Our event is being held this year at The Ritz Carlton. In offering to help, I was drafted as the volunteer coordinator for the pre-event, Dress Extravaganza.
All the attendees get everything free. The boys get free tuxedos and the girls come to our Dress Extravaganza! Free dress (or dresses as they may lose weight due to treatments by the time of the prom), shoes, purse and jewelry. Friday we set everything up.
We had two shifts of volunteers for the set up. In the morning, we set up the tables and unloaded the truck of everything from the warehouse. In the afternoon, we set up the room for the weekend. Dresses were racked by size. Shoes were sorted by sizes as well and displayed on tables. Jewelry was all sorted and laid out. Purses displayed on a table as well. Having two shifts allowed me to meet so many different ladies. One lady and I were arranging dresses and we had a nice talk. She (as often happens to me) was curious about me so I told her what I tell everyone, ASK, ask anything, you cannot offend me. I want people to learn, to feel more comfortable. I spent the entire day helping where I could, thanking each volunteer individually, asking them back Saturday and/or Sunday or making sure we'd see them again next year.
Near the end of the day, I engaged this wonderful, delightful, introspective woman in a very long conversation. We talked about our kids, getting them off to college, raising them, conversations women have all the time. I have to say, she brought me to tears because I was a woman to her, a new friend, a confidant. We hugged a few times and we just kept talking and talking, walking to our cars, talking... I was really touched to make such a wonderful friend in such a short time. We agreed to share a glass of wine in the near future and talk some more. THIS is what I cherish. THIS is why Kandi exists. Touching people, showing people that I am no different than anyone else and in many ways, maybe I offer a richer look at life.
So now it's Saturday and it's show time! I got a late start (what gal doesn't?) due to a nail malfunction among other small time setbacks. When I got there my volunteers for the AM shift were all there. I walked around thanking them all, getting them set up and then took my position as the greeter, greeting the young ladies and their families as they came to shop for their dresses. WHAT AN EXPERIENCE!!
First off, my volunteers were all special, each and every one of them. We probably had in excess of a hundred volunteers. They spanned the gamut with regard to age, teens to those slightly older than I am. All got a "look in the eyes" thank you from me, along with my sales pitch to come back next year. Most gave and received hugs (you know me.....).
I had many experiences, too numerous to detail here. A local cosmetology school was there to do nails, give back as well as arm and hand massages, etc. I got to know most of them and could not have felt more like one of the girls. Truly special, especially the hand and arm massage I got. Honestly, I don't understand it and I am not saying this to brag, it's just a fact, people, particularly women, warm to me in a millisecond. Lady and after lady, really meaningful talk after meaningful talk, hug after hug, I made so many friends.
Finally, and this is where the tears flowed. I was getting ready to leave and thankfully had already put on my sunglasses (an extremely sunny day, made even brighter by the snow that fell the day before). Two aunts and a boyfriend were waiting for one of the girls to come out of the dressing room. I struck up a good 25 minute conversation with the aunts, open and honest about what this beautiful young woman went through and me (gee, that always seems to come up?). Long story short, two bear hugs before I left in tears, thankful for those sunglasses.
April 7, the prom! [Skip through this if you are not religious] Thank God I am who I am! This crossdresser, accepted without hesitation by literally hundreds of women, all rallying to provide love to these young women, who know what struggle really means. You can believe all the media BS you want, you can complain about what we cannot do all you want, I choose to live in the moment, know THIS is the real world. People are not only good, they are loving and great!
You can see pictures of the event, me with many of the volunteers at: https://kandis328772669.wordpress.co...-extravaganza/.
If you think I fooled anyone, I didn't. If you think anyone cared, they didn't.
). But from that point onwards, I think it's all you as a person because you don't only talk about dressing-related topics, and your responses in those conversations are not influenced being in a dress - you're just responding based on what you feel, think or believe i.e. the kind of person you are. That's how I interpret it.
