I'm a little lost as to where to start. It's been a long journey to this point, but over the past two years of building confidence and acceptance of myself, I'm emotionally ready. Frankly I need it! Been all dressed up with nowhere to go too many times.

Here's what I've done to get ready:

1) Practice, practice, practice makeup, etc.
2) Learn to not dress like a hooker. LOL. Been purchasing reasonable, age-appropriate clothing, makeup, etc. I'm 38, not 18.
3) Taking short trips out, walking around the block, etc. (that was in LA, been in OC for 6 months and that aint happening here)
4) Get a counselor who specializes in the challenges I face, starting that soon
5) Become fully honest and open with my wife. I told her before we got married, but it's been a roller-coaster ride.
6) Join communities like this
7) Make outreach to people I find like-minded.
8) Desexualize it. This was a big one. As I learned to accept my real self, it kind of desexualized itself.

So, for all the above reasons, I'm feeling ready. Problem is that I have nowhere to go.

I've made attempts at several phases of my life to make outreach to the community. The first time was HORRIFIC. I was living in a different city then, but I braved going down to what was described as a crossdressing shop with a safe dressing and communal space built around a community of like-minded people. I went down in drab about 10 years ago and told the stranger there everything. She was the most judgmental, unwelcoming person I've ever met and it cause a FULL PURGE. I recoiled in horror from anything to do with Katrina for a few years.

Second time went better - it was online. Tried to make friends, but nobody was really interested. I wasn't at the right phase of my life and self-acceptance that I am now, but it still didn't work out.

Now I'm ready. My wife and I are going to have a girls night in the immediate future, and that will build more confidence because NOBODY has ever seen Katrina. That'll be a big first step, and I don't care if it goes well because even if it doesn't, then my wife and I will be one step closer to figuring out the boundaries. She's fine with me, and fine with me going out, but she's not sure if she wants to be a part of it, and I COMPLETELY accept that.

Anyhow, now I'm looking to try and kindle some friendships as don't think I can do this without someone more experienced. I work hard at trying to pass. I'm sure I don't yet (and likely will never properly - I'm too tall) but if there's anyone out there that my story resonates with that, I promise I'm fun, smart, discreet! Looking only for friendship. I'd love to meet people of all ages, but I'm specifically interested in meeting people around my age who can give me tips on working with what I've currently got.

Also, I'd like my first time to be in LA County, not OC.

So! There's my outreach to meet new people. I feel like I kinda need a "big sister" for the next phase of my journey.

Thanks for listening!

XO,
Kat

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PS. I’ve changed my profile pic to a piece I’m calling All Dressed Up With Nowhere to Go