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Thread: All seems well

  1. #1
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    All seems well

    My wife and have had a short break away from home and we talked a lot about my dressing. Although she is not happy with it as she married a man not a woman and is not a lesbian, I thought there was some progress but I knew this was upsetting her. When we got home and she was out I took all my stuff and went to get rid of them but I couldn't do it, it would feel like throwing away part of me so I left them in the car.
    When got home she went for a shower but came straight back downstairs to ask what I had done with my clothes, I told her what I had happened and that they were still in the car she told me in her "stern" voice to go and put them back in the closet (oh happy days).

    Many hugs,

    Tracy

  2. #2
    I can only be me Samm's Avatar
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    The only time I get rid of anything is when I'm trying to make room for new things. I've purged twice before, years ago. I'll never do that again. I'd rather put everything in storage.
    That was a nice gesture by your wife. I'm sure she realizes how big of a step that was (for her), and for you for clearing everything out to begin with.

  3. #3
    Gold Member Lana Mae's Avatar
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    I am glad that all worked out for the good! Hugs Lana Mae
    Life is worth living!
    "Foxy lady! You look so good!!" Jimi Hendrix

  4. #4
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    She is trying to under stand you; so please go slow with your dressing.
    My wife was OK with my dressing, but with certain rules.
    One was not to embarrass her by going out side.
    So go slow and maybe set some ground rules, that way all is happy.
    Rader

  5. #5
    Platinum Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    Tracy, the difference between men and women. Women talk to tell their feelings. Men talk to solve problems. So while your wife was emoting just to tell you how she felt, you thought she had a problem that you need to fix.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  6. #6
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    Interesting reaction. I can imagine my ex saying exactly the same thing had I boxed everything up. Sort of a ‘don’t be stupid’ admonision. At the same time, her inner voice might well have been wishing that purging the need was as simple as emptying a closet.

  7. #7
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    Somegood advice here, don't react too hastily as things may get better.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  8. #8
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    Tracy,
    To say they only clothes isn't the full picture I totally agree they are part of you , if you like the part that shows the World how we feel inside . At some point we start to chose clothes that bring out certain aspects of us , some people like bright colours to match their personality others might chose mre sombre colours because they are more introvert , we have that choice as CDers that men don't get . When was the last time you heard someone call male clothes sexy or cute or glamourous ?

    Well maybe your wife is sensible in more ways than one , she probably knows you can't live without them but also she also knows at some point you will go out and spend money on relacing them . You are so lucky having someone that understands .

  9. #9
    Senior Member Nikkilovesdresses's Avatar
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    Your wife seems conflicted, but fundamentally reasonable. Keep talking, and above all don't push her limits.
    I used to have a short attention spa

  10. #10
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    The wife and I have covered this idea of her being a lesbian (she's not). I usually respond by saying the reality is you are not in a relationship with a women. The reality is you are married to a man who crossdresses.
    Why fit in when you were born to stand out? - Dr. Suess

  11. #11
    Aspiring Member LeannS's Avatar
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    Tarcy You are to have a wife that is coming around. As I could only wish, I think if my wife saw me right now she would freak the hell out.


    move slow and love her more
    If you can't laugh and have fun you might as well go home.

  12. #12
    Senior Member Tracy Irving's Avatar
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    Melting some ice is always a nice ending.

  13. #13
    dress to feel the energy Shely's Avatar
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    This is a conflicting dilemma on both sides of the isle. We are all trying to cope with the odd situation which we find ourselves in. I have a hard time every time i try to "thin the herd" of my 75 or so dresses. I will box a couple of them up and later go pick out a couple to save. I do have only so much room for my things though. I don't know what would happen if my wife said they have to go. I did tell her a long time ago, if you want me to get rid of all this stuff, I will. I hope she never calls my bluff, but i meant it at the time.
    https://www.flickr.com/photos/lovethatdress/

  14. #14
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    Many thanks to all, some good sound advice as always from you ladies.
    Taking things very slowly but after our talks it seems she understands my need for dressing and losing the clothes
    would make the craving disappear. I can't imagine her ever wanting to see me en femme but I can live with that.
    In a strange way this could have been the best thing to happen and I just wish I could have found the courage to
    tell her years ago.

    hugs,
    Tracy

  15. #15
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    I know that alot of other people have said the same thing, but I will say it again, go slowly, and don't push it.

    My wife and I had gone through several ups and downs with my dressing (over 30+ Years). I still ask her if it is OK when she is around, and somehow she just recognizes the pink cloud around my head and tells me to go put on my clothes.

    I never push it, and don't dress over the top when she is around.

    Take is slow be happy that your best friend understands.

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