Funny how things turn out

[Helen_Highwater]

At the bottom of this post is my tag line, "Who dares wears, get in, get out without being noticed".

For those unfamiliar with the SAS elite forces I "borrowed" my line from their motto, "Who dares wins". They built their reputation on being able to go behind enemy lines undetected.

I chose the tag line really before I started going out and about in earnest. It's now with the benefit of hindsight just how poignant that tag line turned out to be. If there's one thing I've learned that's contributed to me gaining so much confidence to be able to move freely amongst the muggles it's about, continuing the military theme, wearing the right camouflage.

To put it another way, I learned to dress to blend. Not standing out, looking like everyone else, melting into the background. That's the basis that's allowed me to interact with SA's and from that become myself, not thinking I'm a CD'er, OMG they're going to make me, but this is me, who I am and I'm just shopping like anyone else.

With a little bit of courage and a dash of daring do it's surprising what you can achieve.

So yes, it's funny how things turn out.

[Teresa]

Helen,
If you're forming a new regiment please put my name forward for joining up . OK the burning question is what will you call it ?

Seriously I agree with you , I'm not sure if I like nice outfits called camouflage but in a manner of speaking they are . Sorry I don't totally agree with you about leaving unnoticed , we sure are, believe me !

[DaisyLawrence]

I used to think I was noticed until the wife told me it was just the blokes looking at me like they do all the girls so 'welcome to the club' so to speak. She then said that I should tell her when a woman gives me a double take as then I will know I was clocked. Still waiting. This advise gave me two things. Firstly it gave me confidence that I could do as per your tag line Helen and get in and out without being noticed. Secondly it made me realise just how much men objectify women for their sexual appeal and nothing more (if they only knew).

[alwayshave]

Helen, its a great tagline and a better mode of going out undetected.

[Beverley Sims]

You do have to own it a little and be daring.

It eventually becomes easy and seems like an anticlimax when it does become that easy.

[Rachelakld]

If I'm that well camouflaged, I need to get louder clothes.

[Rachael Leigh]

The real test as it were is going out and doing things such as getting a pedicure en fem or sitting down at a restaurant
will you be noticed then or do you get treated like one of the girls.
I did notice during my recent pedicure a couple of knowing smiles. I’m ok with that because I’m just me

[Helen_Highwater]

Rachael,

Knowing smiles go with the turf. Getting read and being comfortable with it is, as you allude to, part of the journey to becoming who we are. Having that comfort factor enables us to dine in restaurants, travel on public transport, do a myriad of things folks do in their daily lives without being self conscious. It was one of the most important moments in my life, that instant when I stopped seeing myself as a crossdresser and saw myself as the person I am. Not ashamed, not self conscious, not caring what those around me think. That said that doesn't mean I forgot to be aware of my surroundings and remembered to stay safe.

Beverley,

It eventually becomes easy and seems like an anticlimax when it does become that easy. There is a truth to that statement. The "Normalization" of being out with the masses can make the whole event seem lacking in purpose. There's no rush, no adrenaline buzz. All of a sudden life becomes mundane and that in itself takes some adjusting to. With mundane comes comfortable. A karma that allows us to do even more. To expand our enfemme lives to do ever more things.

When I adopted my tag line it was unknowingly a glimpse into the future. Gaining that confidence has been just wonderful. I only hope many others can find that place to.

[docrobbysherry]

I bet I dress to blend better than u do when I'm out shopping, Helen. I go disguised as an old man.

And, in 20+ years? Not one SA or customer in any store has ever made me as a CD until they see what I'm buying!

[Stephanie Julianna]

Everything you say and do is my credo and experience as well. Dressing to pass is always my goal. And it is my ticket to cruise the women's departments without raising any eyebrows. I simply love being accepted as a woman when dressed in my favorite clothes.

[Amelie]

I am the opposite. I dress strange and sometimes wild, especially my make up. People think I am insane, they stay away from me and leave me alone.

[Sarah Doepner]

Since I'm over 6 feet tall, dressing to blend only takes me so far. I just spent a week in Las Vegas and dressing appropriate to the venue and activity combined with just about everyone else being distracted by the sights, sounds and crowds of other people, or just accepting me as part of the scenery, I did fairly well. All those factors sure helped build my confidence and made getting out the door so very easy.

I was clocked any number of times but only mis-gendered once. I believe that speaks to my presentation and confidence but just as much to the growing attitude of the population. There are those who would have spoken up under specific circumstances, but shopping, eating or just wandering around the casinos didn't rise to those circumstances I guess.

[sometimes_miss]

To put it another way, I learned to dress to blend. Not standing out, looking like everyone else, melting into the background.

Blend? Me too. I'm a crossdresser hiding in plain sight, disguised as a standard issue male. I blend perfectly. No one ever seems to suspect at all.

[Shely]

I've only been out a few times so far, but more on the way. But i always dress fairly plainly so as not to attract attention. But when i dress at home, its all legs, big jugs, bright colors, long hair and lots of jewelry. If you attract attention you will surely be picked out by more and possibly draw unwanted comments. My next aouting will be in a nice conservative 3 piece pant suit with the grayish wig to match my 69 year old face.