As many of you know from my previous posts I started working full time as Sara at the beginning of last September and with few exceptions have lived my life exclusively as Sara since then. In that time I have become incredibly comfortable being Sara out in public and as a result it is not constantly on my mind that I've not always been Sara. This resulted in getting myself into an awkward situation the other day. I happened to be in a part of our city that I don't normally frequent doing some shopping. I noted a bakery and realized that I had meant to buy some more bread to make sandwiches for my lunches at work. It made sense to quickly run into this bakery, where I had never shopped before, and purchase my loaf of bread. So that is what I did. Now at this point I must backtrack a bit - actually rewind my life by about 20 years. At the time I was working for a different employer from where I currently work. One of my colleagues, whom I will call Steve (not his real name), became a good personal friend. In fact, he and his wife were guests at my wedding though this is not relevant to the story. Bottom line, Steve and his wife were good friends of ours with whom we socialized regularly. About ten years ago my friend and his family moved to California to study to become a chiropracter and in time we lost touch with them. At that time the fact that I was transgender was a secret to everyone but my wife. Fast forward to the present. I walk into this bakery and who do I see standing behind the counter but my friend Steve with whom I'd lost touch years earlier. Unfortunately it was at that moment that my mouth got ahead of my brain and without thinking I blurted out "Steve? Steve is that really you?". He looked at me with a thoroughly blank expression and replied "Yes but you are?". It was at that moment that my brain caught up to my mouth and simultaneously I realized that I was standing in a bakery with about three other customers and several staff members all staring at me. My friend clearly still looked thoroughly confused and puzzled as to my identity. Of course, to me, it was all painfully crystal clear. Here I am standing fully presenting as Sara, a woman, and expecting someone who has only ever known me as a man to recognize me. To make matters worse, now, not only did I have to explain my new reality to my old friend but apparently to a roomful of strangers who were all now curious as to what my response to Steve was going to be. Clearly telling Steve that I was Sara and "hey remember we used to work together" wasn't going to suffice. Needless to say the next few minutes were very awkward but at the end of the long explanation, Steve who had always been a very friendly, kind and decent person gave me a big hug, had a few minutes of nice conversation with me and then send me home with an armload of free bread and assorted baked goods. So at the end of the day I will subscribe to the edict that all is well that ends well. I was a bit embarrassed but hey I got to reconnect with an old dear friend.
With that, it occurred to me that I cannot be the only one who has ever had their mouth get ahead of their brain like that. If any of you have had something like that ever happen to you I'd love to hear your stories.