I constantly hear "Girls can be what ever they want to be" ?

[Judy-Somthing]

I constantly hear "Girls can be what ever they want to be" ?
What about US? I never hear "A Guy can be what ever they want to be".
So unfair!
What do you think?

[char GG]

Who or what are you listening to?

I believe the saying “girls can be whatever they want to be”, pertains to education and careers. (There is a push to get girls more interested in math and science).

[Brynna M]

It’s not so much about being what you want to be as it’s a slogan saying girls shouldn’t be intimidated by “prestigious” and “challenging” careers like engineering that typically aren’t female centric. “Don’t be scared of math” isn’t an inspiring slogan. While there are many careers that are female centric that guys have a harder time fitting into like child care or nursing or elementary education the perception is not so much that men can’t do these things as it is that a man shouldn’t want to be in such an “inglorious” career. In truth none of us is smart/athletic/talented enough to be anything we want but boys are less likely to rule out “prestigious” field just because they are boys. Boys probably need to hear “ it’s ok to be anything you want to be” (even a fashionista)

[Micki_Finn]

It’s actually a direct reaction to a time when men were allowed to do any job but girls were literally told “girls don’t play sports” or “girls can’t be police officers” etc. I don’t know if I can even explain how chauvinistic this question is.

[Pat]

Yes, it's a female empowerment thing, but I have to say that all the time I was growing up I always heard, "You can be whatever you want to be." It wasn't really addressing the question of gender, but it was a constant refrain from teachers, parents, coaches, etc. That's what adults are supposed to tell kids -- all kids. And that's what adults are supposed to enable.

[Judy-Somthing]

Well all I see is girls do and wear what ever they want but guys better be guys.
My wife told me that I better not tell anybody I took sewing classes, and never to wear anything PINK!

[deebra]

Judy I fully understand what you are saying in you post. You are talking about acceptance of the clothes and presentation each gender is suppose to conform to according to society. To bad some negative people on her just can't wait to distort a thread or post and tear it apart. Very sad.

[Jaymees22]

There was an Army slogan "Be all you can be." That would apply to all genders that want to join the Army.

[sometimes_miss]

I never hear "A Guy can be what ever they want to be"

It's just assumed. That doesn't mean that you will be respected for being something considered unacceptable for a man, though. You won't get any congratulations for being a nurses assistant, a beauty shop shampooer, etc.. But you can be one if you want. About the only thing they generally will restrict you from being is a wet nurse (because being one would require taking various hormones which would be excreted into the child's milk), or maybe an ob/gyn nurse, simply because you'd need a chaperone ever time you went in to examine a patient, so it would be a waste of a job slot.

Learn to appreciate what you DO have available to you. Nobody gets to do everything. Wilt Chamberlain couldn't be a jockey, and Willy Shoemaker couldn't be an offensive lineman. Find something that you CAN do, and enjoy, and can find someone willing to pay you to do it, and do that.

[Helen_Highwater]

Perhaps the phrase should be, "Boys don't have to be macho". Perhaps then that could create workplaces which are more attractive to females as opposed to "Making it in a man's world".

[RachelB.]

Girls can now be boy scouts so maybe it adds a whole new level to this saying

[Joan58]

My wife told me that I better not tell anybody I took sewing classes, and never to wear anything PINK!

I remember one semester in high school,A friend and I had an open slot for a class.nothing offered at that time period that either of us had not already taken except home ec. so that is what him and I took.I do not remember any body making fun of us and it was a lot of fun.would have been around 1975 or 76.

[alwayshave]

Judy, I have a number of pink and lavender shirts from Brooks Bothers, nobody has ever said a word. Also, when my daughter was 13 and wanted particular curtains, I sewed them.

[Amelie]

It's sad to think people live in a world that wearing pink clothes or learning to sew can be a problem.

Men can do anything they want. Except for hurting others or committing a crime sort of stuff, but everyday stuff men can do the same as women. It's the world that one creates that stops them from being their selves. There are times that I feel that society seems to be digressing rather than moving forward. From the posts I read it seems we are moving back in time to the 50's.

Of note, I didn't go to sewing class, my dad taught me how to sew.

[Majella St Gerard]

men don't need to be told that because it's assumed anyway. James Brown said it, "It's a man's world ".

[Alice Torn]

Over 60% and growing , are the number of females in colleges and universities, and grad schools! More professionals are women now, than men. I have heard women say, "men are not needed anymore." Also, have seen women in tee shirts that say, 'Girls are the future", and similar things. The pendulum has swung far the other way now. If poet Robert Bly thought men were in "grief", in 1990, how much more are men in "the ashes" now?!

[CONSUELO]

For centuries society, not just men, has tried to define women's roles and behaviour. Certain professions were considered acceptable and others were thought of as scandalous choices for women.
Men also face many societal constraints but they are much fewer. So the last several decades have seen a rebalancing and as with all rebalancing efforts the pressure to required move the "pendulum" is large because of inertia. Then the pendulum gains momentum and probably will overcorrect but at some time in the future it will come into some sort of balance.

Many people on this site have openly wondered why it is that women have a wide latitude in the way they dress. The spectrum ranges from the very feminine to almost masculine. In contrast the range of the male dress code is quite restricted. I have often wondered if this arose as a result of overcompensation for the restrictions placed on women in the past. However if you look at the early 20th century it appears that with a few exceptions, the female dress code was rather restricted also, viz. the fuss over women wearing pants.
Meanwhile society still has a very narrow male dress code.

[Teresa]

Judy,
I come from a generation that swear it's a man's World, the women/wives play second fiddle to what the man wants.

I feel the big change has happened through the media, take a look at adverts now, most are to do with women looking good and having a great time , many also depict the power women appear to have by looking good and putting the man in his place . I agree girls do appear to have more fun and be what they want to be , that's the way western culture has changed but not all cultures .

I know you thread is back the the theme of your DADT sitaution , It's gone on a long time and still you haven't managed to change anything , OK if all you have is to keep venting here then you'll have to carry on doing that if it's your only outlet , I'm sure most of us wish we could change your situation for you but I'm afraid you're the only one who can .

[Jaylyn]

Judy I don't think it's unfair because when I grew up back in the 1950s guys where doing about anything they wanted to do. Bringing home the bacon has some called it. Girls were taught to be a homemaker and dads were the bread winner so to speak. The women then after the house chores were done got together at each other's houses, talked, drank coffee, and played card games. They all usually wore dresses then by the way. Didn't really do any dirty men's jobs outside the house. They had it made in the shade and then when the first WWI and then WWII came around many women were trained to work in the aircraft factories and assembly lines for weapons and planes. Thus the women became a worker outside the home front. Most able bodied men enlisted thus leaving a void in work staff in the factories and the void was filled by women. This got the women in Americas work force and it really escalated even to the point we have women on the front lines, women leading men into battle. It made a line of division between male and females. Time and wars advanced the female role in being the provider of the home front, raising kids, and thus began the women's movements.
My wife thinks that was a females down fall because her mom didn't have to work outside the home but now in order to pay bills, make mortgages, raise children, and keep the female image that they can prove they are as good as the males at anything she says she was expected to work.
I personally like it as the GGs shot themselves in the foot by wanting to prove they were as good at working as males. Many like my wife would rather instead of working be a stay at home and keep the house in order and have me do 80-90% of the money intake and she has often told me she wishes the saying girls can be what they want to be had never came out. One time they were the queens of the castles and now they are working girls and still have to work when they get off their jobs. I love it some GGs hate it. Just a little history lesson from an old college professor I had that happen to be a GG.

[Stephanie47]

My wife is a teacher. This slogan is not limited to just girls or women. It is also applicable to boys or men. If you go down to your local elementary school or go on line to the school's directory of classroom teachers you'll notice the lack of male educators at the elementary school level. There is a push to get males into the lower grades. Many boys do not have any male role models in their lives, and, the interaction with male teachers is of benefit to them. Over the years teaching has been thought of as being a woman's job. I know in many states the pay scale for teachers really sucks. Pay gap? Pay women less than men?

I also see a change in nursing. I see more and more men in the nursing field.

If you check the stat on the percentage of women in college in fields customarily thought of as male dominated; engineering and medicine, more than half the student population is female.

The biggest impediment to young women going forward in any field is set early on in life. Too many boorish men subconsciously direct their daughters to a "traditional role model." That notion is also passed on to girls by their older brothers. My wife sees it all the time in the lower grades of elementary school.

[faltenrock]

Well - I do what ever I want and who I want to be. I go out as Doreen quite a lot, and it's fun and satisfying for me.

[docrobbysherry]

If u don't think men or CD's can be whatever we want to be, Judy? How does that account with my experience? Successful business man who started dressing out of the blue at age 50.

And, check out my avatar. Taken among about 100 CD's in a restaurant at Vegas. And, I just turned 75!

If ANYONE out there, male or female, thinks they can't do something? I suggest it's mostly U that's holding u back!

Because we still live in the greatest country on earth.

[LilSissyStevie]

Yes, nowadays they tell girls they can be any thing they want. They used to tell boys that lie. It's total BS, of course. Only a small percentage of people will become doctors, lawyers, engineers and etc. And apparently here in the US, you're unlikely to get into one of those professions if you were born here. Our education system is in full collapse so we have to import talent from elsewhere. My wife is a high school science teacher and she is basically not allowed to fail anybody. The kids know it and don't do any work at all. Colleges are increasingly becoming the same. They just want that government guaranteed loan money and students graduate from the university as indentured servants to the banks only to work as baristas not barristers.

There is a lot of mythology about the '50s being a time when women were chained to the kitchen barefoot and pregnant. My mother went to work when she was 14 (in 1944) doing farm labor - topping tobacco, picking cotton, sorting potatoes- while still in school. She always had a job and supported the family (my father was a bum) until she retired in the late '80s. When she retired, she was earning an income that would make most men envious. She often said that she would have given anything to have what most feminists rejected - the ability to stay at home and raise her children. BTW, I never saw my mother wear a dress or skirt except for work. When pants became acceptable in the 60's, she never wore a dress or skirt again.

[kimdl93]

that comment "be whatever you want" isn't meant as a promise nor a guarantee that simply wanting something is sufficient. It IS an over simplification of a basic fact of life. You "can" become what you wish to be, provided you a) understand what it takes to become "whatever"; and b) are willing and able to invest the time and energy necessary to become "whatever"; and c) that you can accept the possibility of failure.

I have friends who are doctors, layers, engineers, professional athletes, etc. They became these things in some part because of physical aptitude, but far more importantly, because they committed themselves to the effort, coped with setbacks and persisted.

[Tracii G]

Stevie your post is dead on.
I agree the education system is a joke anymore.
Of course now a days kids think they can get something for nothing. They have been taught they are entitled to things and don't have to expend any effort for anything.