Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 26 to 35 of 35

Thread: Coming out to friends who are coworkers

  1. #26
    happy to be her Sarah Doepner's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Utah, north of West Jordan, south of North Salt Lake & west of South Salt Lake
    Posts
    3,832
    There are several species of ducks I'd prefer to get in their rows before making that decision.

    First is your motivation a real need to share or a product of excitement as you grow into your new awareness of yourself? If it's some variation of pink fog making that choice, you better back off for a while. Next I'd take a good look at your company policies on protections for employees. The best results usually come from contacting H.R. first to make sure management is behind you, then staging your coming out. Normally, but not always, this is done prior to going full time. Then it's probably a good chance to take a look at the other people around you. Have they shown support for the LGBTQ+ community in the past or are you in the dark as to how they feel? And how does your wife feel about that? Is your wife okay with you sharing this information about yourself? If so would she prefer you share with other close friends or family first?

    All that said, your's may be a very progressive company with uniformly great and understanding employees with no agendas of their own that would ever, anytime in the future reflect back on that knowledge.

    I'm not saying "No", but suggest you avoid being impulsive. There are many ways this could go quite well and end up in your favor, but history has shown there are probably an even larger number of ways for it to go wrong.
    Sarah
    Being transgender isn't a lifestyle choice. How you deal with it is.

  2. #27
    Senior Member April Rose's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2017
    Location
    Massachusetts
    Posts
    1,095
    #1 What Di said. Discuss it with your wife first.

    #2 As others have pointed out, the fact that it's work complicates this way beyond friendship. The company I retired from had a progressive H. R. Policy. On paper it would look like it was all good. But in truth, our division was broken down into smaller branches each with as branch manager who would interpret things as they saw fit, and who was also responsible for our performance reviews. He was very good with the sales numbers, so his job was very secure. He was also something of a petty tyrant who could be very vindictive when things didn't go his way. If he didn't like someone, their "performance" ratings would begin going down until eventually he got rid of them.
    I was careful not to get on the wrong side of him. But I would NEVER have risked my personal secrets getting into that building, regardless of who I was friends with.

    Now that I am retired, and my income is safe, I don't care who knows. But you have to pick your battles.
    I am a vessel of the goddess. Let me express my calling to a feminine life through nurturing love and relatedness.

  3. #28
    Silver Member Rogina B's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Ft Lauderdale Fl
    Posts
    3,962
    You wish to reveal that you are a ???? No benefit whatsoever...Stick with your wife.

  4. #29
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    The state of flux, U.S.A.
    Posts
    7,212
    Remember, the number of people it requires to keep a secret: ONE.
    This seems to be the typical chain of secret keeping: https://youtu.be/brC_jK6stBs?t=20s
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  5. #30
    Curmudgeon Member donnalee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    2,114
    Whoa!!!
    Don't let the Pink Fog blind you.
    ALWAYS plan for the worst, then you can be pleasantly surprised if something else happens!

    "The important thing about the bear is not how well she dances, but that she dances at all." - Old Russian Proverb (with a gender change)

  6. #31
    Aspiring Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2017
    Posts
    599
    Friends, maybe, but think it through and never rush in. I have some friends who know and that's been a great addition. As for co-workers, that's really got to be a big no. Which leaves friends who are co-workers, well, they're co-workers. The best advice that I've ever seen on these boards on this topic is, don't think about what you wan't to happen, consider (and consider deeply) what is the worst case scenario. And that should help you make up your mind.

  7. #32
    @--}----- Sissy_Michelle's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Birmingham, Alabama
    Posts
    496
    Lexic18,

    Coworkers. . . So you’re not “out” to your coworkers but wish you were?

    When a few of my coworkers found out it was because they hugged me or put their hand on my shoulder and felt my bra strap or band. I didn’t announce it to anyone and asked respectfully that they didn’t share my secret. I did lose a couple of “friends” at work but they did keep my secret. The coworkers that remained my friends and continued to speak with me are still my friends even though I don’t work there. We did on occasion go shopping and a couple of ladies nights here and there. I was fine with who knew, the possibility that more knew is very possible but no one ever said anything nor treated me different.

    Just remember once the cat is out of the bag, there is no putting it back in. Just like a picture you post. It doesn’t belong to you anymore.

    @—}——-
    Michelle

  8. #33
    Silver Member daviolin's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    West Michigan
    Posts
    2,756
    A secret is not a secret if more than one person knows. Daviolin
    [SIZE="6"]
    [/SIZE]
    A CD AND HIS WARDROBE, ITS A BEAUTIFUL THING.

  9. #34
    mini kilted chick t-girlxsophie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    Lanarkshire,Bonnie Scotland
    Posts
    3,004
    I confided in a cpl of girls at work and I've never had cause to regret it,but I've worked with them for a hell of a long time.we've shared lots of girly chsts
    We look to Scotland,for all our Ideas of Civilisation-Voltaire

    ========================================

    A woman who loves to wear beautiful clothes is like a flower.
    A man who loves to emulate these women is a special flower-a rose
    Facebook:Sophie Johnson

  10. #35
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    S.E.Baltimore Co. Maryland USA
    Posts
    43,780
    Hi Lexie , See line #4 in my signature, Good Luck. <Orchid......
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

    I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !

    If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.

    Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  


Check out these other hot web properties:
Catholic Personals | Jewish Personals | Millionaire Personals | Unsigned Artists | Crossdressing Relationship
BBW Personals | Latino Personals | Black Personals | Crossdresser Chat | Crossdressing QA
Biker Personals | CD Relationship | Crossdressing Dating | FTM Relationship | Dating | TG Relationship


The crossdressing community is one that needs to stick together and continue to be there for each other for whatever one needs.
We are always trying to improve the forum to better serve the crossdresser in all of us.

Browse Crossdressers By State