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Thread: Been a while...

  1. #1
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    Smile Been a while...

    Good afternoon all,

    Thought I would drop in and say hello. I hope you are all doing well. Monnica and I are, but had some stress and life things to be dealing with, in both camps, and there has not been a lot of time for Monnica or dressing. I find that when M is stressed, and needs to focus on life, even though I know it would help to let go and dress to relieve some stress, it's not pleasurable and ends up getting shelved. As our relationship doesn't revolve around M's dressing or becoming Monnica, it is only a facet, we are still mad about each other and I do what I can to let M know that if the need is there, I am perfectly fine with it.

    I still do small things to make this happen, putting out clothing as an option or some fun panties that can be taken or left for underdressing. We came up with our "Armageddon" safe(ish) word that either of us can employ if we are not feeling it, like anything else, really (going out for dinner, to a friends house or event) and the other is very respectful of the others needs and it works for us.

    One day I laid out some female attire for M with a sign that said "Armageddon, or...?" with arrow pointing to the female things next to some male options. M wore some of it, but not all, and that is perfectly fine with me, I would not have been disappointed either way, as I was doing this for her, not for me. I felt this sadness, though, when M came downstairs in mixed clothing and asked me sheepishly "Is this okay?", doing a little spin. I don't want M to feel like my permission has to be granted, or forgiveness if only the male things were chosen and nothing female.

    Recently M sent me an email stating that she still has "doubts" if I enjoy it, saying she fights in her mind over this a lot. I don't know if I can or ever will be able to change that, but I remain positive and supportive and I let her know, often, that I do. And, as actions speak louder than words, I **show** her that I enjoy it; by setting up these little things (as mentioned) and other ways. This is one of those whole "It's not you, it's me." things and I can only take her at her word. Later in the email she expressed, deeply, her love and appreciation and telling me that I am doing an "excellent job" with everything and this keeps her "over the moon" for me, so I am really trying not to let the earlier statement eat at me.

    I hope this is not misunderstood, both of us are trying, both of us are learning as we go. Her, being in an actual accepting relationship with someone who loves her for all she is and wants to be and is a willing participant in the exploration of it all. And me, as a (not quite so anymore) newbie to it all, well, as deep as it can go, and am learning with love and patience what she needs and wants, as she is for me in all of this, so it is a two way street.

    Anyway, I just wanted to let you know I am still here, we are still very much in love and good, and I truly hope you are all doing well in your lives, as best you can.

    Take care and have a wonderful weekend.
    -g <3

  2. #2
    Senior Member
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    Glad to hear you both are doing good. I think what M is trying to say is he can't belive she got so lucky to find you. Being in a similar situation, I can say it's not you just it's so mind blowing it takes a while to get use to it.
    As for her asking if what she was wearing was ok she was maybe fishing for a compliment or opinion more then permission or approval. Just my take

  3. #3
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    Thank you for the reply. I don't think it was a compliment situation, considering M was wearing scrub pants and a black tank top, opting not to wear the thigh-highs or bra (I knew the outer clothing had to be masc this day). It was more like a "I just couldn't do it. So, are the items I chose alright, even though I didn't pick them all?". M chose the panties, necklace and glitter body spray. It was the tone that got to me, more than the actual question. I know M is hurting in his male life right now, with everything going on, and I thought a little token or having a part of Monnica with him might help make it easier. I hope that makes sense.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member
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    As relationships go you guys are doing a really great job!
    Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.

    Eleanor Roosevelt

  5. #5
    Administrator Di's Avatar
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    Sounds like things are going great!
    About the doubts M has that you enjoy it/ Sher did that a few times over the years and I said and made it clear ( I thought) that she could do whatever she needed to be herself at any time. I used to think it was because of things that happened in the past and not me.
    Anyhooo glad things are going well for you both.
    If you are a Genetic Female (Female at Birth) and would like to join us in the F.A.B. Forum, please follow the link.

    F.A.B. Forum Access

    Sherlyn,My beautiful sweet girl
    You forever and always will be my one and only true love . ❤️


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  6. #6
    Silver Member
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    One way you might show her that you are absolutely, fully supportive would be to have a dress-up session for her with you picking out the outfit to wear, helping her get dressed and then helping with her makeup, wig and accessories. Then take photos and tell her how pretty she is. This might help.

  7. #7
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    Keep going as you are and your relationship should develop in a way that will be good for both of you.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  8. #8
    Member Sashauk's Avatar
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    Littleg2, It does sound as if you two have a wonderful relationship. Monica is so lucky to have someone like you for support and encouragement. I understand that it must be difficult for her to accept that you are really on-board with it all, so there is always going to be those times when doubt creeps in and she feels insecure about it all.

    I wish my relationship had been like yours - sadly mine was very much a NO.
    Sasha

  9. #9
    Rural T Girl Teri Ray's Avatar
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    Littleg2

    Sounds like you have the right intentions in mind. Take things slow and keep communicating. You are a wonderful person. Best wishes.
    Teri Ray Rural Idaho Girl.

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