i’m sure there are threads about this already but it’s probably the thing i struggle with the most actually is my femme speaking voice. i sing in a falsetto all the time easily (and i have a higher singing register anyway) but my normal speaking voice is quite deep unfortunately. any tips and tricks to practice?
My voice is deep, and my falsetto is phony as a femme voice. So, I speak in my male voice but softly .. just above a whisper. Works for me.
When I worked in retail I had a regular customer who I saw maybe twice a week. She was a lovely lady but she looked, and sounded like Ernest Borgnine. Several other ladies I served had deep voices also. I could never manage a femme voice so I would just use a softer version of my normal voice.
Here today, gone tomorrow....
I have seen so many varying opinions on this. Some believe you need to use the falsetto voice and work down. Some will tell you not to use the falsetto at all as it can damage your voice. Most of the professional voice coaches teach to the pitch and reverb and tell you to ignore the youtube videos about moving the adams apple up. Me personally I did a mix of both and just practiced a ton and there are numerous apps to measure how male or female you sound. Just remember you may never achieve the "ideal voice" you have in your head so don't stress if you don't sound your version of perfect. Females all have a wide range of high and low and you will find a sound that works it may not just feel that way at first. Drink tons of water too while you practice.
I use my regular voice just softer.
Female voices range from high to low so don't worry too much about it.
I've practiced a few times trying to do a good female voice, but I could never do it right. Especially when the moment comes when I'm dressed up and in a public setting. So I just try to do a softer version of my voice to be as passable as possible. I have a deep man voice when I'm in my normal mode.
thanks for the advice, yea it makes sense there are a lot of different voice ranges out there for sure. i’ll just try and get the best compromise i can.
I've given up looking for my female voice. I don't really think about it anymore. My friend did point out though when we were out that I did speak softer than normal and I never even realized it. But then again the male me is a loud mouth LOL.
When I get together with other crossdressers hardly any of them attempt to speak with a female voice. If you do, you have to remember to keep it up. Then there are a few that naturally have more of a female voice.
My voice is really low so I try to raise the pitch of my voice approximately half an octave if I want to sound more fem. If I forget to keep it up it's not such a big deal.
Falsetto results in a Micky Mouse voice so don't do it! If your strongly desire to have a female voice, just keep working on it. Record yourself speaking and adjust your voice the best you can.
"You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder
I have never even tried to alter my voice beyond speaking softer. What's the point? Unless you got started on hormones as a teenager, anyone who talks with you for more than 15 seconds will figure out that you aren't a GG. Embrace who you are and celebrate it.
Hi Courtney, We only get one set of Vocal Cords and we do the best that we can with what we have.>Orchid ..O
O..
Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~...
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Courtney ,
I assume you asking because of going out , most of us in our social group don't worry too much about our voices , it's very hard to keep up a false voice and also you have to be careful it doesn't attract more attention to yourself . I'm out most days now and it really isn't a problem .
Last edited by Teresa; 07-15-2018 at 12:43 PM.
I also have a rather deep masculine voice, but I have learned to do a very passible female voice. I initially studied a method posted on YouTube by one trans lady, which is unfortunately no longer available. I also studied two online courses that taught how to feminize a male voice. Those cost about $50 each, for an eight to ten lesson course. It took me about four months to get it to the point where I don’t even have to think about my voice. Now, the wig goes on, and the voice just shifts. I can chatter all day, from sleepily waking up to exhausted after a night of dancing, and once it is in effect, it takes a conscious effort on my part to sound like a male again. From quiet conversations to shouting out encouragement as a softball cheerleader, I still sound believably female. My voice even passes in phone conversations. About the only thing I can’t do yet to my satisfaction is singing like a female. I am working on that.
So, here is some advice. Falsetto is not your friend. No cisgender woman sounds like that. Not naturally, anyway. Realize that some very feminine voices do speak in the lower pitches, and work with that. While it is good to raise the pitch, you only need to go up half an octave or so to get to a believable voice. Much more important is the timbre and resonance of your voice. If you use the full volume of your male voice box to speak, the timbre and resonance created will be too low for a woman.
The courses I studied taught to change resonance and timbre by tightening the throat enough to be using the upper part of the voice box. One way to practice that is to slowly increase pitch until you approach a falsetto, but then try to go lower while keeping your throat about as tight. Another was is to use one of the electronic meters that musicians use to tune their instruments, and practice “singing” words as an “E” note. They can be had for about $30 or less, if you shop around. Speaking more softly helps, especially at first. You can speak louder after you get the basics down. I am on my tablet right now, so I don’t have access to the names of those two courses that I paid for. But a google search for “feminizing male voice” should find them. They are worth paying for, in my opinion.
And what you say and how you phase things is even more important than the actual sound of your voice. Pay attention to cisgender women’s speech patterns, and what phrases they use. A guy will say, “Give me a beer. Bud Light.” A demand, and very decisive. A woman will sound less demanding and more like she is asking for the item. For example, “Let’s see. Could I have a pale lager, please? Oh, I suppose a Bud Light will do, thanks so much!” A male voice tends to monotone, while women vary in pitch throughout the sentance, using pitch as part of their emphasis.
I get it that the majority of the CD community, and even a large chunk of the transgender community, do not try to change their voice. If you are certian you don’t pass anyway, why bother with a fake voice? But if you even come marginally close to passing, a good voice can put the lock on your presentation. If you sound believably female, that is one more point in favor of being accepted as ‘genuine’. Whereas if you open your mouth and instantly remove all doubt, you’ll never pass. Many here say it can’t be done. That no one born male will ever sound female enough to be believed. Or that it is much too hard to do. But you will never know unless you try. And I assure you that it is possible.
How much difference does it make? Well, here is one example. On at least two occasions, while out socially with women who had known me only as a woman for at least six months, but who knew I was trans, the subject of my voice being diferent as a male surfaced. When asked how I sounded when I am not presenting female, I took a deep breath, shifted my voice back down, and spoke. Jaws dropped, and I got more than a few “Oh my God!” reactions. They could hardly believe that deep male voice came out of my mouth! About an octave lower and much more resonance and timbre as a male. So yes, it can be done. And yes, it can make a huge difference in your ability to pass.
I just want it to sound just a little bit feminine. I am not trying to disguise it. How can I make it sound a little more attractive, and sweet?
Roxanne
It depends on what you are trying to accomplish Courtney. If you are looking to not get "clocked" or eventually "pass" completely as a woman (even potentially transitioning) the voice matters a whole lot. Converting to a female voice has nothing to do with hormones either, as genetic males our vocal cords are expanded into a much larger area than a females. You have to narrow that space down to come in to a female sounding register. Almost all men when they talk their voice originates from their chest hence the deeper sounds. Most women their voice originates from either their throat or the area around their mouth which is why the bass doesn't register in female sounds. Some people find success moving their voice to a falsetto and then moving that sound down until they find something comfortable. You are never going to continually talk in a falsetto as it would sound ridiculous but some need to go there as a step to find their female register. There are differing opinions on trying to find it without the falsetto because if you continually push your voice into the falsetto or higher you can permanently damage it. If you feel your voice feeling strained or damaged you need to stop, rest, and try later. As I mentioned before drink lots and lots of water especially if you have never attempted to find it before. Finding a female sound is about 50% of the battle though because men and women do actually talk differently so just because you sound female doesn't mean you won't get "clocked." Personally I found all of the advice out there about moving the adams apple up or holding the adams apple up to find the female sound useless.
It isn't something that you will master in a day or even a week either. It won't be like oh yeah I practiced for 15 minutes and I sound great now. It will literally take tons and I mean tons of practice because you are training your throat muscles and your vocal cords to operate differently. You may even find "the voice" several times and not be able to hold onto it at first but eventually it can be done where you can flip back and forth between them and not have to even think about it.
~Sometimes it's better to just let things be, let people go, don't fight for closure, don't ask for explanations.~
To the original post, yes, I think a lot of us have this as a major issue. Thankfully my voice isn't too deep, kinda' middle of the road. I just bring it up just a touch and talk a little softer than normal. Thanks to countless visits to Walmart, I've heard plenty of real women who sound more like a man than I do, so, makes me feel better!
In my experience it takes a lot of practice. With practice most of us I think can achieve a passable female voice. I have an app that I use to test the pitch of my voice, which has helped me develop a female voice. I also ordered the Kathe Perez which helped some. Around seven years ago I received a great suggestion which was to talk from the upper part of the throat instead of from the chest area.
Over 7 years ago I would have never dreamed of achieving what I have achieved today. Now at work when I answer the phone I am consistently getting called ma'am. These are people who do not know me and have to totally really on my voice to decide how to gender me.
Grace
Courtney
I also use a softer voice tone when talking to girls and it comes naturally with practice while I'm alone.
Rayleen
Wanting something is a fantasy which on a long time period clouds your mind and makes you think you need it.
Rayleen
The pitch has come more naturally for me. But one thing that I just cannot seem to get is a natural breathiness with my voice. It's a process I guess.
A topical article on transgender people and voice training: https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/...=.d839d5b3de78
I am not a woman; I don't want to be a woman; I don't want to be mistaken for a woman.
I am not a man; I don't want to be a man; I don't want to be mistaken for a man.
I am a transgender person. And I'm still figuring out what that means.
Hey Pat,
The program described in the article is exactly like the one I am in at the University of Houston.
i guess i have noticed that females have a different way of speaking with what they say. before i worked in a warehouse i worked in a front office position as one of two guys with all ladies. now i miss them it was a nicer environment they were all super nice to me. it seems to be a polarizing opinion about falsetto but i guess ill try both ways and see what works. i’m still figuring out what i doing with this newfound expression. i never expected it to affect me this much, to love it as much as i do. maybe i will search for some classes as online as well. i would just feel better if i sounded even slightly more femme. even just to go out shopping one day would be exhilarating and nerve wracking. thanks everyone for the support. i just know dressing is a game changer for me whatever happens.
Ceera, your post was very informative and helpful. I just wanted to add one thing.
Guitar tuners (free) can also be downloaded as an app for your phone or tablet. I also have a free tuner on all of my computers. Make sure you get one that will also sound each guitar string so you can hear different pitches.Another was is to use one of the electronic meters that musicians use to tune their instruments, and practice “singing” words as an “E” note. They can be had for about $30 or less
"You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder
One trick is to sort of tighten you throat a bit... like as if you were to gargle..... and speak.
I will raise you voice without giving you an awful falsetto.
Do this a few times and it will become second nature...... seeming quite natural.
BTW, not all woman have a high pitched voice like " Bernadette Rostenkowski - Wolowitz" on TBBT.
Last edited by Barbara Jo; 07-15-2018 at 04:27 PM.
i was going to maker the same suggestion as Ressie. There are many apps available that can be used like pitch pipes or guitar tuners.
Also consider a voice recorder app to playback your voice. Your voice sounds different to you than it does to others since it travels to your ear drums through your bone structure in addition to the sound waves in the air. Others only hear the sound waves through the air.
I tighten up my throat and try to resonate in my nasal cavity rather than my throat. When listening to announcers on the radio, I listen to the differences between men and women. If I pay attention to the women's voices, I can distinguish the nasal quality in their voices. It seems to be more so in younger women. I also speak softer. Not 'perfect' but more convincing than my male voice.
I need more work on the enthusiastic intonation and sing-song delivery that women speak with rather than the dull unenthusiastic monotone I perfected over the years to sound like the other guys.
I also need more work on using hand gestures and facial expressions for a more convincing female delivery.
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