First person I ever told and she can't handle it. Breaks my heart. I was very explicit. Heels, dresses, skirts, underwear, makeup. I told her everything. I know it's a lot to take in for her. Just trying to vent but I feel like I really blindsided her. We were gonna get married soon. She demanded that I show her pictures and I did, and that made it really hard for her. Such a tough situation. I feel happy to have admitted it to somebody but so weird. She thinks I have a psychiatric disorder. I need to vent.