Haven't posted in quite sometime, just too busy! I'm closeted and DADT is the relationship status. She's known before we got married but, I still get comments or questions as if I came out yesterday.
Summer is my least favorite time of the year, in terms of dressing. Kids out of school, then they're friends are in and out of our house (we have a pool), we entertain at least twice a month, etc...
All that activity is great for everyone else but me. It cuts into "my time" a lot, by over half if I was guessing. So I got an odd question from my wife.
"How do you manage your 'desires'?" she asked. I told I don't or at least very well. "Haven't you noticed how distant I seem or how easily agitated I get?" I replied.
I drift off for hours virtually shopping online, putting together outfits and makeup pallets. I even metally critique the clothes female visitors wear to our parties.
I try not to snap at people but, I do. I become very short tempered and less understanding than usual. I don't enjoy it, I like being laid back and happy!
I just told her this is always part of who I am. If I wake up in the morning, Jayne is there too. The only analogy I could give her was how she felt when she stopped drinking wine during her two pregnancies. She's not an alcoholic by any means but, she did miss it.
That's not a great comparison either. The drinking is something she does and enjoys. I enjoy dressing but, that's the physical part of myself. She's not intricately connected to a few ounces of crushed grapes.