Firstly i would like thank everyone that sent messages in my last post that made me feel so welcome. I was asked if I could give a little more info about myself so here goes. I think I knew I was different when I was very young but didn't understand why. I remember being a page boy at a relatives wedding and crying a lot at the time. Everybody thought it was because I had to wear a frilly shirt and velvet trousers but really it was that I wanted to be one of the bridesmaids instead. I had a few thoughts i still did not understand as I went through the school years and then in the late teens the thoughts got stronger. I dated several girls and enjoyed it but always felt envious of the clothes they wore. In my early twenties i met a girl and we married. I thought this would solve all my problems and prove that I was just normal like all my mates. I held all my thoughts back for quite a long time but would occasionally try something of my wife's on when she was out. We eventually had children and I just tried to hide my increasing thoughts. I eventually became self employed and got a workshop which became my sanctuary for dressing in a skirt and top in secret when I could get the time. Time moved on and the kids grew up and moved out. I carried on in secret as I knew my wife would never be accepting in any way. The last few years have been very traumatic with other family problems so I kept things totally secret. I now live on my own so can dress a lot more often than ever before although I still have family commitments that take up a lot of time. I usually come home from work and change straight into a comfortable skirt or dress unless I know someone is coming round. This is where I am at today and am now hoping to take things further gradually using a lot of what I have already learned from this site and in the future. At least I now know that there are so many others similar to me around the globe which has given me some hope in my journey forward. Carrie-Anne
