I love it.
But I'm constantly asking myself why. Even though it doesn't really matter.
I love it.
But I'm constantly asking myself why. Even though it doesn't really matter.
I love Crossdressing! I started less than two years ago and don’t feel bad about it at all!
Michelle.
How could I call joy and freedom an affliction?
thats a tough question. I vacillate among ways of viewing my behavior. At times, I think of it as an addictive disorder, perhaps the product of a traumatic early childhood experience. At other times I see as something like autogynephilia...basically a substitute for a feminine companion, or when I was married a desire to be a female companion to my wife. And at times, I try to view myself as less pathological...simply variant among a great diversity of gender identities.
Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.
Eleanor Roosevelt
Ah, the use of one word to define such a complicated subject. "Love?" "Affliction?" I will say my life would have been less complicated if I was not a man who wears women's clothing. In the early years wearing women's clothing brought much turmoil; shame, self loathing. How was a teenage boy suppose to reconcile his raging hormone induced love of women with the fact his also felt compelled to wear women's clothing? Society in the 1950's and 1960's painted with a broad brush. Men who wore women's clothing were deemed to be homosexuals. Gay was not used yet. Derogatory terms defined you. How could this be? Much self loathing. Much shame. Yes, wearing women's clothing back then was an 'affliction.'
Now, decades later there is self acceptance. No more shame. No more self hatred. Yet, life would be a lot simpler if I did not have this desire to wear women's clothing. My wife is not accepting of this desire. Unlike Judy's wife, she does not rail against this desire. She simply states she wanted to marry a man, the man I presented to her during our courtship and still do. If she wanted to be with a woman, she would have been with a woman and not a guy who wears women's clothing.
Do I love to wear women's clothing? No! It's something I do because it is in me. In my DNA. I've given up trying to figure it all out. A counselor I see for war related issues holds to the premise that each man and woman has some DNA of the opposite sex within him or her. In some it is stronger than others. That seems like an acceptable premise. "Born to be wild."
Yes, I am drawn to certain styles and colors and fabrics of women's clothing. But, that is no different than being drawn to certain clothes I wear in my male life. I don't "love" cross dressing. It's part of me, whether society accepts it or not, I have to deal with it.
I love being a woman and expressing my femininity with my clothing. I think that having male body parts is a little odd, but hardly an affliction.
I love cross dressing, even in limited amounts. I have been in a bra and forms for over 4 days, 7/24 and my wife just ignores it. But, I feel good
sarah, I am six foot six. That is why i do not want a short fat lady. I have had short fat women friends often, though. Just my personal choice, i would want a taller woman ,like me.
Love.
And it is an incredible journey to acceptance. Sometimes fun and sometimes extremely painful. There are moments still when I hear myself saying “I wish this had never entered my life. Why is this my path?”
But I catch myself. The waves come and go but the flow is always in one direction and I realize this is a journey. Sometimes messy. Sometimes a little insane but in the end a beautiful experience.
Last edited by Felicia M; 07-29-2018 at 01:13 PM.
I have been circling for a thousand years,
and I still don?t know if I am a falcon, or a storm,
or a great song.
Rainer Maria Rilke
https://www.flickr.com/people/170325405@N05/
I do not see it as an affliction at all. Crossdressing is a part of me. I would not be the person I am today if I didn't do it at all. I think it keeps my masculine and feminine traits in balance. I have many good friends now that I would likely never have even met if not for crossdressing. Besides all that, it is a lot of fun for me. Maybe I'll think about quitting it when it stops being fun. Maybe.....
Phoebe
Absolutely love to crossdress. Not an affliction, certainly a passion. Not going away for me.
Its only an affliction if you let it be one.
If you have guilt or shame and can't deal with it then I could see you thinking that.
I first discovered my mothers closet while in my teens. This was the 1970's and where I lived, it was the biggest taboo of all for a boy to show the slightest hint of femininity. My fathers attitude was that such people deserved to be killed. So I was horrified and disgusted by my newfound interest, and terrified at the prospect of being found out. This was compounded by the fact that I couldn't stop myself from returning to her closet every time I was left alone in the house. I definitely felt this was an affliction that I wanted to stop and that nobody, not even a significant other, would accept or understand.
It took a long time, but now I feel my gender expression is a gift. I am a Two Spirit, and am at my best when both sides are equal partners in my life. Nowadays, I am happiest in a skirt, because female clothes are more varied and fun, and because my femme side had to spend so much of my early life in hiding, she gets the nod whenever I have a choice in how to dress.
At some point long ago I might have answered affliction but certainly not now. I absolutely love it.
Affliction.
It becomes an obsession (for me at least), and being obsessed is the very antithesis of freedom. You become enslaved to it. When the pink fog rolls in, I can hardly think of anything else. I'd love to be free of this for good. It's also been hell on my marriage.
I do not choose to give a name to why I crossdress. I have struggled to understand what the attraction to dressing and acting enfemme is for me. I finely found peace in accepting the fact that the "why" I have this desire is no longer an issue. I accept it as it is. I do enjoy the feeling of being enfemme and I do not have a desire to be enfemme 100% of my life. When my wife and I had the "talk" and she became willing to accept this behavior as part of me; life became so much better. I love that my wife can accept that her man is sometimes in makeup and dresses. It is a balance of life to be sure. But I am one of the luckiest people in the world to share this passion with my soul mate. Hopefully I won't screw this up.
Teri Ray Rural Idaho Girl.
It is not an affliction for me. I find it has expanded my horizons. I look forward to seeing where it goes from here.
Sami
My new blog: The Crossdresser Report
https://crossdresserreport.com/
An affliction. I really don't understand why anyone would choose this life if they had the choice. Spending every waking moment feeling like I'm in the wrong clothes? No thank you.
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
It is not an affliction. It is a pleasure. I totally love the clothes and how they feel and make me feel. The delight in purchasing new items never fades and, at 65, I have been wearing female clothes for over 50 years.
I'm in the position of not coming out to family and friends not because of any shame or guilt, it's possible consequences with family and just feeling it's unnecessary with friends as I'd have no desire to dress in front of them.
Hence I've arrived at a point where for me it is what it is. I do it when I can, I just don't over think it.
It's part of me, it won't go away so why fret about it. I want as few negative feelings as possible when dressing so I've consigned deep thought on the matter to the mind's store room. I interlectualise about it in about the same way as boiling an egg.
It's an affliction that I love.
For me? An affliction? No, absolutely not. A Love? Yes, oh yes indeed! But more than that, it's me, it's what makes me, me.
Not an affliction. For me it's just a simple pleasure of life to explore and indulge in occasionally. I used to dress and feel fabulous and then a wave of shame and guilt and throw everything away. I've accepted that dressing is just a small part of who I am and I consider it harmless fun. Not a compulsive dresser. I think the last time I went full out was two years ago. I recently came out to my wife and she has been 100% supportive. Just trying to take it slow and not overwhelm her.
Yes to both. I loved to dress and shopping. if I could go back and stop myself I would. It is way too expensive. I also feel like it inhibited my ability date.
Sara
I love dressing, but it is an affliction. No, I don't want to stop, it would be nice to be normal, but I think I am a better person for it. I see the world differently, it makes me more sympathetic to the needs and desires of others. Thanks for asking
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