Beautiful wives or SO's

[Joyce Swindell]

When my wife and I were dating and I had decided that I was falling in love, I told her about Joyce. She then did some research on crossdressing. The theories she had read about and has since substantiated with our group meetings​ are that crossdressers pick their SO's based on one of two factors. One...we pick them on our view of what we ourselves would like to represent in femininity. Or two...that our choice of SO poses no threat to our size or style.

This conversation sparked some thoughts of my choices. Neither of my wives presented as real feminine​ when we first met. But I've always worn a smaller size than both my wives.
Have I ever thought about it that way.. not​ that I'm aware of. So was this something I had in the back of my mind from my feminine side for picking a mate?

For me I feel I picked my current wife by her soul... I could see hers and she could see mine. My first wife was so long ago I don't recall much... teenager... probably just being horny and the life values that you have to be married to sew your oats.

[sarah_hillcrest]

My wife did not present and act overly feminine when we first met. We both had a sort of wannabe hippie thing and wore lots of tie dye T-shirts. At this time I didn't have a strong urge to dress, it was there, but well below the surface. I was critical of women who wore lots of makeup and acted overly girly, I think deep down I was jealous LOL. We were similar in size and body as well. It took me a long time to realize it but I have a very feminine spirit when it comes to relationships, I wanted to be the purser and not the pursed. I remember being so excited when I found out she liked me.

One interesting thing is that over the years she has slowly developed a more feminine style and interests. I think in a way we kind of spurred each other on.

[Joyce Swindell]

I love it when my wife wears a dress. It makes me jelous and makes me happy.

[Felicia M]

Great topic Joyce and I would say from my experience somewhat true. Much like you I feel we picked each other for our souls and although she doesn’t know yet about my journey I feel she is one of the most accepting persons I have ever met. I do wonder often if subconsciously that was part of the attraction.

[Jaylyn]

I know that this was part of my attraction at first sight. She was blonde, big boobs, small waist and wore mini skirts. Her make up was over the top and she flirted with her big massacred eyes blinking and her big red lipstick stained lips. I fell in love with her inner soul and her delicious body. She was wearing heels and just looked what I had always lusted for in my dreams. We definitely are soul mates and still in love even though we have disagreed about some things in life over the forty years of marriage but our finding each other is not one of the regrets. I love her today more than I did yesterday and it's only growing stronger.

[suzanne]

By her own admission, my wife is not feminine. As a child she had no interest in dresses or makeup or anything else considered "girly". So when I began to admit to her that I liked to dress, she couldn't understand it, had no sympathy for me and only wished it would all go away. It never did, and after several rocky years, she grudgingly began to accept my dressing. About her only limitation now is that she refuses to go out in public with me while I'm dressed. I consider that good progress.

She has changed, as well, in subtle ways. We now go together to a nail salon for mani/pedis. A few years ago we were invited to a wedding. She didn't have a dress to wear to it and there was no time to go out and buy one. So she went through my closet and found one, then asked me if she could wear it. I told her I would be honored if she did. That happened once more for another wedding then she went out and bought a dress for herself. More recently, although she still doesn't wear skirts, I am noticing how she is buying tops that have more style and color coordination than in the past. Is that something I have influenced? Perhaps, but it's still not a topic she wants to discuss.

One other area where she has taken a cue from me is in leg waxing. She used to buy those in home kits and do it herself, with predictably uneven results. Then, one night, some time after I had been going to a wax studio o a regular basis, she began running her hand up and down my leg, under my nightgown. Then she stopped, removed her hand and rolled over to her side of the bed, never once saying a word. A few days later, she asked me where I got my legs waxed. I told her and she commented that it was not a convenient location for her. Still later, she began making appointments at a place near home.

[Rayleen]

Joyce,

When you and soul mate are true lovers for over 40 years in my case, we are able to share whatever we desire.

My partner always accepted me in my inner feelings in CD. Would not do it any other way.

[Chelsea B]

I’m with you Joyce. My wife and I saw each other’s souls from the beginning. Little else mattered, though it didn’t hurt that she is very feminine.

[Teri Ray]

My love of my life is as feminine as they come. She has style, poise and a wonderful attitude. She knows I dress and she accepts me for who I am. It has not been an easy road since we had "the talk" but she accepts that I am still a good person despite my desire to dress. I believe that soul mates always find a way. There is an advantage to having a husband who desires to crossdress. We share the joy of shopping and appraising dresses and shoes. I am so very lucky and I love to brag about it.

[Micki_Finn]

I would have to completely disagree with your assessment of why I chose my spouse.

[Pumped]

My wife has always been feminine, almost to a fault! Our first real date she showed up made up very nice, make up and hair styled, in heels and a sheer top with a cami underneath and I was hooked for good if I wasn't already. She has an assortment of dresses and skirts and she would wear tiny, tight mini skirts in her younger years. I remember walking into a bar once and she was wearing a tiny little white Lycra dress. Two guys walked out past us and one said to the other, "Did you see that babe in the white dress? Holy crap!" Pretty much what I thought too!

We were married 35 years ago and even though she is in her late fifties she still can turn a head or two. We went out for dinner Saturday evening. She was wondering what to wear and where we we going, I told her it was up to her. She suggested a couple different bars, nothing fancy, jeans and sandals in the summer. A while later she comes out wearing high heels a tiny little animal print party dress I bought her, but never expected her to wear out of the house. I looked at her and said, "Seriously?" She laughed and said we need to find a bit fancier place to go for dinner. We did, found an upscale restaurant that was quiet and expensive, had dinner and a couple drinks and went home for a nice evening together. I noticed a few guys straining their necks as we were walking to and from the restaurant. We had a nice time when we got home too, wink, wink, nudge, nudge!

[lingerieLiz]

I dated lots of girls before I found my wife. Several of the girls I was very attracted to. I was always confident as a CD of my looks and how fem I was. My girl friends didn't look like each other. I was never hooked on a girl with a certain look. My wife and I had the same philosophical view of life. She was beautiful by any standard, but I dated many girls who were stunning.

[Beverley Sims]

Dressing never came into the equation.

Beauty was not a part of it either.

It was something soppy called love for the other person.

Hey! It worked, I am still married.

I do feel for those that did not make the right choice first time around.

[Kiwi Primrose]

My wife and I got on well and married. We have had more than 60 years together.
What got us together and keeps us together ìs humour - we laugh together.

[susan54]

I have never picked a partner mainly on the basis of her looks, though they have all been attractive. Their personalities made them beautiful. None have been into the sort of clothes I like on them or read women's magazines or any of that sort of thing. There was one lady who would only dress up to the nines when I wore a dress (just the two of us at home) and on one occasion she wearing a very shaped top and I remarked that I was wearing a bra but my girl friend wasn't. She was tolerant more than supportive and I don't think that remark helped. In contrast my last partner had a figure that could stop traffic, wore make-up all the time, and spent a fortune on her hair and it didn't last for some reason - our personalities never quite matched. So I don't think the original theory holds for me - I have never picked a partner who looked like I wanted to look or who would never compete with me - the thoughts never occurred to me, even looking back. Personality really is more important than looks or clothes.

[NancySue]

My wife, of many years, is very feminine, tall, blonde, very girly and has done some fashion modeling. I told her about NancySue before we got engaged, fearing the worst, but after long, honest talks and lots of reading, she accepted this part of me. She’s always supported me and is very helpful. Many times, when she shops, she’ll surprise me. I’ve never returned anything. She has a great sense of humor and often kids me and we both laugh. Our only disagreement is over underwire bras, heels and hose. I love and wear them. She can’t wait to take them off. Life is good.

[Desiree2bababe]

My wife was a hottie and loved makeup, tight dresses, high heels everything Desiree loved. Back in the day, when she was that way prior to children, change of life, etc. , she didn't mind Desiree - didn't love her either but tolerated her. I married her due to love, the fact she knew and still loved me, and because the sex was good. Nowadays, it seems she can't stand the sight of Desiree. Perhaps it's because she can't sport a pair of 5 inch spikes and a short mini and at least I try..........who knows, it's a wonder we have stayed married these 33 years with all the revelations Desiree has exposed her too.

[Alice B]

An interesting question. I was very much a macho male in a very highly public macho career.Thus my first three wifes ( that is right 3) were very much attractive woman and presented as such, due to their upbringings and values. Yhey loved to dress up and prace. I ended divorcing all three because our base values did not match and for other reasons that do not matter here. I have been married to my 4th wife for over 27 years. She is a very attractive woman, but in ways that are very different and she is highly educated, which I found very atractive. I fell in love with her on first sight. She is beautiful inside and out and for her age can turn a head. She is not at all into clothing, shopping, make up, etc. A total opposite from my previous wifes and their attitudes. That she has grown to accept the Alice side of my life is a pure bonus. It took a while, but I am a very lucky lady

[Alice Torn]

Not ever married, and no SO, but i do look for a lady that is a lot like Alice, but i am open to them if they are not quite what Alice is.