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Thread: Lost my mo jo

  1. #1
    Member leannejacobs's Avatar
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    Lost my mo jo

    As much as I've suspected my dressing was as a result of anxiet, I thought there must be more to it than that, however, my life has had a number of changes lately including a change of job, I now work close to home so no long distance travelling.
    I know I'm a lot less stressed and pretty happy with life now but these changes have definitely had an impact on my need to dress, I say need and not desire on purpose, I still have the desire but the need isn't strong enough to make me dress, basically I can't be bothered, it's not bothering me too much but I know I enjoy dressing too,,,,, what to do??? Do I just go with it and maybe even stop all together? Or just take the odd opportunity to dress just to keep me happy?

    Anyone else experienced this?

  2. #2
    Silver Member Debra Russell's Avatar
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    Just hang in there and go with the flow - moods and needs change, soon something will trigger your want too and need too and life will seem normal ---- it never goes away...…………………………….Debra

  3. #3
    Rural T Girl Teri Ray's Avatar
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    I believe that its just life taking its course. Not to worry. Just be happy and go with the natural flow of your life. If that should include dressing then go for it. Congratulations on the new job and new found happiness.
    Teri Ray Rural Idaho Girl.

  4. #4
    Banned Spammer
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    I would venture to say its a pretty common thing for CDs to experience.
    It ebbs and flows with many here and it doesn't really mean anything or is anything to worry about.

  5. #5
    Senior Member JocelynJames's Avatar
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    Same here Leanne. For. Early a year and a half now the “ need “ has dwindled and even the desire is a big meh. The other thing I’ve noticed as i approach 50 not much seems to excite me. A few guys from work say the same about 50. I don’t know what to make of it.
    If you only knew the power of the pink fog! ~Joss

  6. #6
    Aspiring Member StarrOfDelite's Avatar
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    I went from the daily commute and eight-hours at a desk routine to working from a home-office a few years ago, and experienced much the same thing that you describe. I found that I could turn on the computer, sit around in my pajamas, or get dressed to-the-nines, or just slide into a pair of men's Levi's and a tee shirt and it didn't make any difference to the way I felt. My take is that the pressure of the office and the male uniform environment created a pressure to get Femme when I was away from that environment. I still had the need to dress, but it wasn't so much of an imperative. I found out that the best compromise is just to shave close, put on light makeup and a wig, and that was enough, I didn't need the panties, the breast forms, the shoes, et cetera, to make me feel "right."

  7. #7
    Member JoannaCD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by StarrOfDelite View Post
    . I found out that the best compromise is just to shave close, put on light makeup and a wig, and that was enough, I didn't need the panties, the breast forms, the shoes, et cetera, to make me feel "right."
    Interesting the different paths we take. I am pretty much the opposite of Starr. I skip the makeup and wig, but wear daily panties, jeans or Bermudas and absolutely the shoes selected to pass generally as men's to meke me feel "right". Occasionally I'll get the desire in the evening to go the makeup route and take a selfie. That will discourage me from another session with the mirror for quite a while.

  8. #8
    Senior Member Tracy Irving's Avatar
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    Same here JoannaCD. Just hanging around the house, I will often crossdress but skip a wig and makeup.

  9. #9
    Platinum Member
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    Hi Leeanne , Just ride t out and ABSOLUTELY do not PURGE!! >Orchid ..00..
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

    I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !

    If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.

    Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!

  10. #10
    California Dreamin Michaelasfun's Avatar
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    I had a period of that after I went out dressed for the first time. Nothing bad happened, but afterwards I kind of lost interest for a while having achieved that goal. I have since amassed much more clothing, accessories, etc. and have gotten my passion back again. Just let it ride, but as Blue said, don’t purge.
    Michaela


    If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice. - Rush

  11. #11
    Silver Member Bobbi46's Avatar
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    Just go with the flow, There was a period( along time ago now it seems) and the need to dress just faded away then one day I woke up and something, a feeling washed all over me and the foirst thing I put on was my bra the feeling of contnetment was huge and from then I never looked back.
    You may have lost the need to dress for now but like has been said here before the desire to dress will never go away completely it is part of our lives, what we born to ultimately do.
    I started life a lost man now I am a found woman

  12. #12
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Sounds like you're worried about worrying?!

    Aren't there other things more important for u to worry about!?
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  13. #13
    I can only be me Samm's Avatar
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    Hi Leanne. For me, July/August is really busy with the day job and side business. I'm 3/4 of the way through "silly season" as I call it. Which during this time, I'm too tired to even think about dressing. (well, I do 'think' about it) As we're getting closer to fall here, and work slows down, I'll no doubt be all in, and dressing every chance I can. Which is usually once or twice a week for a few hours. I did, however, have a chance to dress tonight. And it feels wonderful!
    Perhaps when you get more settled in with your new routines, your need/desire will increase?
    "Samm" Sammara Michaels

    I also speak fluent sarcasm

  14. #14
    Gold Member Alice B's Avatar
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    Do not worry. It comes and goes be it the moon or tides. In the past two years many things have happened to me, all bad. My desire to dress and go out has totally stopped even when I had the chances. I have not fully dressed in almost a year, yet I have started wearing a bra and forms a lot, often for days on end 7/24. I am now not hiding my painted toe nails, going out with open toed sandals in front of friends and a few neighbors. Do I want to fully dress? At times I consider it, but when the time comes nothing happens. I am sure this too will change and Iwill get back to my old self. As will you

  15. #15
    Silver Member Aunt Kelly's Avatar
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    It happens. The impact of major life changes is well established. That it should have an impact on a cross dresser's desire to dress should not be surprising, I guess. Those kinds of events have had that effect on me in the past, though not always diminishing the desire, and instead, increasing it. My advice is to just go with it. Enjoy the break and spend you time and energy on the things that do pull at you. The urge to be dress will most likely return.

  16. #16
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    When other interests occupy your mind such as a family crisis, new job or other drastic shift in lifestyle, dressing takes a break for a while.

    When single and girl hunting, dressing really does take a break and then comes back later on with a vengeance.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  17. #17
    Member rhonda's Avatar
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    Hi Leanne Seems like some of us have to go thru stop and go routine , but to stop totally is not an option , after each stop and restart it seems like we're more into it , we're life members of CD.C

  18. #18
    Platinum Member Crissy 107's Avatar
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    Hi Leanne, As others have said, the desire and need to cross dress, at least to some extent, will never ever go away. I tried for years to suppress it and there is just no way. So don’t worry, you will be ok.
    Crissy

  19. #19
    Member leannejacobs's Avatar
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    I'm just going to go with the flow, although I can dress in front of my wife I enjoy it more on my own, she doesn't leave me at home alone very often but I know that's when I'll take advantage and go for it, she's going away soon for a couple of days, I have no doubt I'll dress, whether I'll enjoy it as much as I have done previously remains to be seen.
    I don't emagine ever being able to give it up completely so I'm not even going to try, I'm just happy with the way my life is going for a change, my new job, my rosey looking future and my relationship with my wife has become how it used to be many years ago, we're very close again and I'm loving it, not bad after 28 years of marriage, if my urge to dress takes a back seat for a while so be it, with having a loving and accepting wife I know I can dress whenever I like so it's no big deal.

  20. #20
    Junior Member
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    Leanne,
    New job, new work relationships, closer relationship with your wife....all externally focused. You haven’t lost your mo jo just put your introspection on a vacation.

    I believe when we look at ourselves in the mirror, while dressed, we are looking at our internal self. We basically turn our psyche inside out. Right now the external focus doesn’t allow that.

    Just think how wonderful things will be when the newness wears off, the old stresses gone and you dress with your accepting spouse and you both get to closely examine the wonderful, beautiful inner you. Gosh I bet that is going to be great.

    Alice

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