why did you join, did you find what you were looking for, did it help.... +or -

[mykell]

didnt want to hijack another thread,
for me this has been quite the journey....when i first arrived i identified as a CDer, in my youth i suppose i could have been the much maligned "fetish" dresser please forgive me for enjoying myself participating in a gross sex act but father guido sarduchi called it a cheap sin


been through gender fluid , transgender, non-binary, after some self discovery after my moms death i may have been intersex, not so sure how to pursue that or if its worth it nowadays.

so i just go with trans these days....i go to support functions mostly to help others but i do love sharing myself with those that me questions.
meeting other trans folks never ceases to amaze....as varied as a box of chocolates. differing perspectives.
helping just one person can be so gratifying....some poeple come to me with preconceived perspectives of who I(we) are and love to dismantle them.

so i came here a rookie, deep in the closet.
im still learning.....i have met some wonderful people and some real buttheads, met some nice folks from the forum in person, through e-mail and texts.
im getting out and doing things id never thought i would have accomplished so ive found more than i was looking for and it certainly has helped my esteem....+++

care to share your thoughts....

[biancabellelover]

Great thread topic!

I’m still new to this; only starting my CD journey in January last year. In an attempt to answer the usual questions, starting with “WTF is going on?”, as well as meeting like minded people online, I joined a number of forums.

I found that this was the most inclusive and accepting, and (for the most part) supportive.

Michelle

[RADER]

It has been 9 short years since I joined the Forum, Glad I did.
I was surfing around for information on dressing. I was wondering if I was the only pebble on the Beach?
When I found this site, it gave me a whole new look at my desire to wear female clothes.
I would never think of under dressing, and now I do it all the time.
I have picked up a lot of confidence and great Ideas here. One of the best things that I have done for myself
was to find and join this great Forum.
Rader

[AllieSF]

When I first started all this from "zero" in 2006 I was a complete novice to the whole idea. After dressing up completely with all the trimmings with the help of a fellow sister, I was hooked even though my presentation at that time was actually very bad. However, I just knew I had to take this show on the road so to speak, get out in the real world. I did that with little fear and a good dose of apprehension. It was a complete success. The rest is history as I let myself as a very mature (old!) adult be led down the path by some slow and a few rather fast steps at a time. I did not really need this site for support (I already had the necessary courage and minimal confidence to be out regularly among the real world humans), but rather as my instructor and source of varied information based on the experiences and research of others. I never really tried to describe (label) myself in any detail, because I accepted myself for who I was and let life lead me forward. I have learned so much here, and still am learning more in my current location a long way down that lovely path to being myself.

[Teresa]

Mykell,
I joined because I was in a mess , at the time I called it a rollercoaster ride . I needed help but was scared the click the JOIN button , what have I done , I've suddenly gone from the closet ( solitary confinement ) to coming out to the English speaking World !
Like you been through the ups and downs of needing labels , not understanding what they meant , did they apply to me , am I really worse than I first thought ??? So many questions and thankfully so many good answers , sadly we have lost some very knowledgeable members but enough remain to chew questions and issues over . I stick around now because I don't believe we will ever know all the answers , the problem being we move on and new questions arise and new challenges . Along the way we can keep posting how we move along that road and hopefully help others who are still to set foot on it . We may not be experts but we are the ones actually living it, the highs and the lows and of course there is much humour to be had in what we do , sharing those stories is a great pickme up .

[Queen Bridget]

I joined just to be around people with similar interests.

In my short time here I've learned a few new things about CDing and even myself.

It's a nice place, with nice people. But sometimes it feels more like a marriage counseling forum, than a crossdressing one.

[Teresa]

Bridget,
The majority here have to deal with all this around wives/partners , I'm separated now after 44 years of marriage that's a huge slice of my life I'm having to put behind me , and that applies to many others , some have had multiple marriages !!

[Krea]

Why did i join? I had been CDing for some time and had begun to realise that this wasn't just a passing phase, it was something more compelling. I wanted to search for answers and find out if there were others like me.
I feel like i have entered a world that i knew almost nothing about. I had no idea there were so many people out there under the TG umbrella.
This forum has been a revelation. I have learned from the discussions here, my confidence is improving slowly due to the kind support. In time i hope to meet with other TG people at a group and it's all because of all of you.

[Eboni Robinson]

I joined to be around like minded individuals. It makes me really happy to know that I'm not alone, and there are so many of us. The support and conversations here are amazing too.

[Lygophilia]

I joined out of boredom at the time. However, one of my former therapists said that she recommend that I be apart of the Louisiana Trans Advocates. So, I think this place can have some merit.

[Mandy T]

I joined to find other like minded people. The support is nice and everyone here seems to be real nice.
So far!

Mandy

[GracieRose]

I was pleased to find this site and realize that there were others like me. I'm not as odd as I thought that I was. And others like me are good people.
I learned a lot from everyone here.
I had a lot of "what if" questions in my mind and nowhere to ask them.
I found many of those answers here from postings of first hand experiences.
So many things that I did not think that I could do: I was too scared because of the imagined consequences that I feared.
When I read first hand experiences here, I became confident enough to try for myself.
My experiences were very much like what I read here from others, and not the horrible experiences that I had imagined.
For years I did not join for fear of someone finding out about me.
I am glad that I finally had the courage to join in the discussions.

[Lydianne]

I'm in a difficult position from a personal standpoint. I joined looking for a dressing community, and I found it. I posted a lot of stuff, made a lot of friends and got a lot of encouragement.


I need to do makeup to feel like the real me, but I arrived with the understanding of CDing being firstly about the clothing. Therefore, I have also been supportive of those who do not do makeup because I understand the effect of the clothing alone ( I was once at that stage ).


Over time, I realised that there was not as much support from our side for those who don't use makeup to try to look as close to female as possible, but I am disappointed in myself that it remained in the back of my mind because I was preoccupied with my experience on the majority side. Only through interacting, which made me recall their struggles for traction that I had seen, I awoke to the realisation that I had been benefiting from a side practising a double standard - i.e. hoping for acceptance of ourselves from the general public while not being supportive of others within our own spectrum.


"Unfortunately", I had already cashed the cheque so-to-speak, and there is no way for me to hand that back. That's something I will have to live with, but what I can do is continue to be supportive and attempt to influence more visible support from my side for those that do not do makeup by pointing out the inconsistencies of our non-support in a way that makes as much sense as possible. Ideally, this would resonate and we'd wake up to ourselves ( it would make us better overall ), but it will probably be conveniently ignored. So, if ( when(?) ) I fail and, through my efforts, I lose everything I have gained by being on the majority side since I got here, I would feel that my experience here would be slightly redeemed.


So what I'm looking for in the community - I found what I thought I was looking for, but it turns out that I'm actually still looking .

- Lydianne.

[Lana Mae]

I had no idea what all this was until I lurked for a few months! Then I joined and the rest is history! A lot of info in one spot mixed in with suggestions and opinions! As BLUE ORCHID says, "When you are here, you are home!" And she is so right! An extended family! Hugs Lana Mae

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Mykell , Looking for some Validation.

I have been in this program for almost 72yrs. now, About 15yrs. ago I started surfing
Crossdressers web sites and about 10yrs ago I joined this great forum.

For the last 50 something years I would find CD magazines & Tabloids in adult bookstores.


I have learned and shared so much information about Crossdressing on this forum
over the last almost 10yrs.

I like to tell the new members, "When you are here you are home,

What ever questions that you have there is a 99.875% chance
that one or more of us will have an answer for you"


With out this forum I probably would never have gotten my ears pierced ..00.. .


It is just amazing the friendships that we can have all over the world
with just a click of the Mouse,


My WonderfulWife Knows about everything but just don't want to see me while I am dressed
W have a ery workable DA/DT, I stay within my boundries nd life is great.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>Orchid ..00..

[DMichele]

Mykell,

Before I joined, I frequently 'cruised' (albeit it very slowly) through this site. I related with some of the shared experiences. I became curious about what I was missing from the member-only sub-forums. So in time I joined, and learned, and learned... and continue to learn about identities, experiences, presentation, being authentic and so much more. This site has enabled me to come to terms with my identity, and for that I am very thankful, happier and more confident.


This site is like a therapeutic spa to me, i.e. I frequently feel enlightened, encouraged, challenged, and more.


Thank you sisters for being here.

Cheers!

[sarah_hillcrest]

I experimented with cross dressing about 16 months ago, and it changed me. I started reading about gender issues and I posted on a few forums my concerns with myself and my relationship with my wife. When I got on here I found a very supportive group of people who were almost exactly the opposite of the toxic online culture that I've grown used to. It's a very special sisterhood that keeps me coming back.

[Allisa]

Let's see... I joined after just a few visits, why not it was mostly anonymous and I could always just go away forever. I found some things I was looking for after reading between the lines of some posts and outright answers to my questions. Is this site any good to stick around for? I joined a closeted CDer with all the fears and woes in my head, now try and stop me from being my femme self moving about the muggles in broad daylight expressing my non-binary self, something I would not have learned about if not for this resource. Did this site help me get out there without others encouragement and support?, NAH!!! I just like knowing I'm not the only one, you know freak, weirdo, pervert, etc... it must be something they put in the water around here that keeps me coming back.Well it's time for my quick dry glossy clear top coat.

[Rayleen]

I came to this site about 2 years ago, just to explore to see if this would help me . After a year I was scared to push the button as someone said, but 8 months ago decided to join,

The group helped me to focus that I wasn't alone and the difference of each individual has its own way of expressing our feminine side.

It also help me to focus on dressing and manners if you intend to transform and going out en femme in public.

I do not intend to be out because of age and I would want to have a more feminine body in order to satisfy me.

I have learned a lot and love the all the postings and we get to join in the conversation.

[Kimberly Adams]

I have been crossdressing on and off for many years. I initially joined the site a few years ago because the family was out of town, I was dressing every day and just wanted a place to go to enhance the experience. Didn't hang around much at first and came back again the following year when my family was out of town again. I just recently totally accepted that this is a part of who I am and made the leap of telling my wife. I came here for advice and support and got it. Thank you. The journey with my wife has really just begun, she's been super supportive but her feelings about me crossdressing are kind of fluid. She asked me if it's normal to love it one minute and hate it the next and from what I've heard here sounds like that is pretty normal. I've been posting here pretty regularly now for the last couple of months, definitely the longest I've stuck around at one time. I love hearing stories about people going out the first time, shopping tips, beauty tips, etc. Also have connected with a couple of people that are in a similar situation and hope to get to meet them one day. Overall my experience on the site has been great. How much I stick around in the future kind of depends on my wife. We have a girl's night out planned in the coming few weeks and have to see how it goes for her. Hoping to get to indulge in dressing a little more often going forward but it's not an obsession. My wife and family are more important to me than dressing.

[Alice K]

Interesting question. Had to go and look at when I joined. Been 3 1/2 years.

The insights and shared experiences have been very helpful in my self-acceptance so I have gotten what I was hoping to find.

But I am totally in awe at some who experience acceptance or even tolerance, even with SA’s.

Whether in my DADT relationship (I would have never married you had I known) or the outside harsh, cruel world (including wise cracking SAs) my (and this forums acceptance) of myself is shaken.

Sometimes this virtual world seems just that, virtual, and not anything to base my acceptance on.

I have been dressing since six, stopped at 17 to be able to survive (literally), started again at 60, and now in my mid-sixties know that I will go to my grave with stolen moments and never really share or experience a life lived as me.

In the meantime, this forum and sites like Nadine’s will have to suffice.

So ladies, from this lady, thanks for being here.

Alice (and it still feels great signing my real, true name)

[Jaymees22]

I too had to check I've been here 6 years, that went really quick. I like this site because it seems everyone is trying to be helpful when they can. I didn't lurk too long maybe a day.
Like others I was glad I wasn't alone. Managed to get out and about some and found a few support groups which help too.

[Becky Blue]

Great thread Mykell... my 'life on this forum matches well with Becky's progression as well as my unbecky period...I joined here in mid 2005 6 moths after Becky arrived so suddenly.. back then I posted very little and was mostly on here to learn about what was happening to me... I was here until My unbecky period and ventured back here about 2 years ago with a very different Agenda (no pun intended)..

Now being a lot more certain about who i am, I came here to meet others, to express my Female side, to try help others that are searching for answers, keep on learning...and hopefully contribute in a meaningful way.

Both my times of here have more than met my expectations, i have met many wonderful people, a couple of not so wonderful and love being able to be myself if even for a few minutes a day

[Mistyjo]

I joined back in January of 2014 and I read a lot of the topics that I thought might help me explain why I liked dressing in women's clothing to wife I found some of the answers to her questions and some of my own questions . I started dressing as a early teenager now i am in my 50s. Before joining this site I wouldn't leave the house if I was dressed. After joining and reading through the topics I would go outside but only after it was dark and it took me about ten minutes just to get out the door. Now days I lay out in a bikini and go pay bills and to the grocery store dressed the only thing I haven't done yet is go shopping for clothing dressed not sure why but maybe one of these days soon. I still have questions and I probably always will I know I won't find all the answers but I am happy with who I am

[Charlotte7]

I joined a mere 10 months ago, which makes me one of the babies of the forum. Why did I join? Because I was looking for like minded people where, in as public a way as possible for me, I could be me, I could talk about cross dressing and I could get support and hopefully offer support. Did I find what I was looking for? I think that I found a lot more than I was looking for.