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Thread: I Finally Made The Call

  1. #1
    Senior Member Veronica Nicole's Avatar
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    I Finally Made The Call

    Well I finally made the call to a therapist. I have an appointment for my first session this Thursday. I have never talked to a therapist and I'm so nervous and all kind of thoughts going through my head on what to say. Hopefully I won't have a panic attack and just clam up, then again I may just let it all out.

    I need some advice on what to say, should I start with hi my name is ____ and I like to dress as a women. I'm so scared and embarrassed that I just may cancel the appointment. So please can anyone tell me what to expect on a first session.

  2. #2
    Member Stephanie Michelle's Avatar
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    Since I haven't been to a therapist all I can say is... figure out what you want to accomplish from the therapy. Start with that and go from there.

  3. #3
    Super Moderator Jeri Ann's Avatar
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    Hey Veronica,

    It is natural to be unsure about the unknown but it will be OK. Your therapist is more than likely experienced at putting clients at ease. He/she might start with personal information in order to get to know you. Then, when you are asked why you have come, simply say, "I have gender identity issues." The therapist will take it from there.

  4. #4
    happy to be her Sarah Doepner's Avatar
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    Therapists are really good at getting you to talk and helping you focus on what your concerns really are. When I first went to see someone I had a basket full of different issues to deal with, several that needed to be addressed before I could begin with gender identity. My therapist was patient, asked good questions that helped me focus and was able to let me feel he was there to support me. Some things I just needed to talk about before I could move on, but just being able to talk to someone who wasn't going to judge me or try to convince me I was wrong or right helped ease the stress. It wasn't long before I was working on gender identity and expression, but with no other issues clouding the way.

    What you need to do is learn to trust your therapist and not be put off by any of the questions they ask. But if you get the feeling they are no longer working for you or are pushing you in a direction that doesn't feel right, ask them what they are attempting to get at. It can be a conversation and the better you know each other and your goals, the better the sessions will be.
    Sarah
    Being transgender isn't a lifestyle choice. How you deal with it is.

  5. #5
    Member Lisalove1976's Avatar
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    Veronica,
    I wouldn't over think it.. I too was nervous but set a goal not to hide anything from someone I really didn't know and she turned out to be amazing she made me feel comfortable and important.

    My suggestion just go with it

  6. #6
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    When I started seeing a therapist the best advice I heard was to be totally honest and open with them and yourself. It doesn't serve any purpose other to prolong the distress to hide stuff from someone who is trying to help you find your way.

    I found being able to finally talk about things that I'd never been able to talk to anyone ever before very liberating.

  7. #7
    Senior Member Laura912's Avatar
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    And from the other side of the desk, everything suggested above is spot on. You are paying this person to help you. The tools they need are information provided by you.

  8. #8
    Member Carolina's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rachel Mari View Post

    I found being able to finally talk about things that I'd never been able to talk to anyone ever before very liberating.
    Absolutely. For me it was the first time I could open up and talk about things I never thought I could share with anyone.

    I was also terrified and tought about cancelling the first session many times. Even at the door entrance I was about to turn back. But this is all they do, are used to many different complex issues and it is their job to put us at ease. In my case I stressed confidentiality about a thousand times before opening up. But once I opened up I couldn’t stop. As Rachel Mari pointed out, it is extremely liberating. I couldn’t wait for the second session, and now I’m looking forward to the next one. Too bad they only last one hour in my case...

  9. #9
    Senior Member Veronica Nicole's Avatar
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    Jeri, thank you very much for your advice. I have not canceled yet so hopefully I will go through with it.

  10. #10
    Silver Member Devi SM's Avatar
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    I've seen on therapy almost 2 years but I clearly remember my first session.
    Of course I was nervous. It's normal because after wife she would be the second person to tell my"secret" (second was a great gay coworker)
    My first session was kind of dissapointing for me because she spent the 45 minutes building my profile with tons of personal general questions, so I left with no answers but the huge relief to have someone that listen me without fears, judgments and professional knowing what to do or say.
    After all that time I think that I don8t longer need her because I almost 100% of my time living as a woman and my fears and dissapeared.
    I can't say that your experience will be the same but remember, as we grow every day a it when kids, we age everyday a bit and in the same way your brain is slowly adapting to changes, all the time...that's they call a plastic brain...
    So go for girl!
    HRT 042018; Full time 032019
    Orchiectomy 062020; gender& name legal changed 102020
    Electrolysis face begins 082019, in genitals for GCS 062021
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    GCS 072022; BBL 022023; GCS revision 04203;END TRANSITION

  11. #11
    Senior Member Veronica Nicole's Avatar
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    Thanks everyone for your advice. The first appointment went really well. I was really nervous but she made me feel at ease after about 30 minutes. It was strange after it was all over I actually felt better. Looking towards my next appointment.

  12. #12
    Member Read only April T's Avatar
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    I had my third session last week. I had a number of issues so kind of got those out of the way. Looking forward to my next session. Not sure what is next for me but it's nice to talk to someone who is very knowledgeable.

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