What constitutes "dressing"?

[docrobbysherry]

Let's be clear about terms here, Bea. Then, maybe we can move on?

I consider wearing nothing but panties every day, a fetish, u r not a CD. But, as Daisy says, if u consider yourself a magician or a CD? Poof! U r one in your mind!
There is a fine line between fetish dressers and CD's. U may be one, or the other, or both to yourself. But, something else to others.

A closet dresser is one who dresses in secret. If a tree falls in the forest and no one hears it, does it make a sound? If no one else ever sees u dressed, r u really a CD? If u think so, yes. Altho no one else may believe that.

[sometimes_miss]

Sorry but if no-one else can see it, I don't see how it is crossdressing in anything other than your own mind.

Well, we are the most important ones to convince that we're feminine, right? Because 99% of us aren't fooling anyone.

It's crossdressing to us, whether we're seen by anyone else or not.

[LilSissyStevie]

Tracy - Understood

SissyStevie - I'll say it again if it helps, if you say you are a crossdresser then you are. Clearly not for the purposes of gender expression/presentation but a crossdresser never the less.

If I'm a crossdresser because I say so, then who are you to say I'm not or to put arbitrary conditions on it? Maybe I like to present and express my gender identity in private.

[Tracii G]

Now you are speaking semantics Stevie because there is no right answer anyway.

[LilSissyStevie]

Semantics matters. You can't logically say that one is a CD if they feel like one but at the same time say they are not a CD because they don't meet some made up criteria.

[ellbee]

Ugh. Arguing again about the definition of CD'ing.


I will post what Wikipedia says, and try to leave it at that...


"Cross-dressing is the act of wearing items of clothing and other accoutrements commonly associated with the opposite sex within a particular society. Cross-dressing has been used for purposes of disguise, comfort, and self-expression in modern times and throughout history.

Almost every human society throughout history has had expected norms for each gender relating to style, color, or type of clothing they are expected to wear, and likewise most societies have had a set of guidelines, views or even laws defining what type of clothing is appropriate for each gender.

The term cross-dressing refers to an action or a behavior without attributing or implying any specific causes for that behavior. It is often assumed that the connotation is directly correlated with behaviors of transgender identity or sexual, fetishist, and homosexual behavior, but the term itself does not imply any motives and is not synonymous to one's gender identity."

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cross-dressing

[Tracii G]

So logically if a woman floats in water therefore she is a witch and she is made of wood.
You can call yourself whatever you want but only you know the truth.

[ellbee]

And for the sake of brevity...



"Definition of cross-dressing

: the wearing of clothes designed for the opposite sex"


https://www.merriam-webster.com/dict...cross-dressing

[LilSissyStevie]

Your response makes no sense. Let's just say that I take the broad inclusive view that one is a CD if they say so. End of story. I don't put any other criteria on it other than that.

[RachelPortugal]

.... In fact while on the strangely popular subject of ladies underwear lets just get a few things straight, no they don't fit men, no they are not more comfortable than underwear designed for men,........

This may be the case for you, but after years of only ever wearing ladies underwear, last year my wife persuaded me to buy some male underwear that was not very dissimilar to some ladies "boy shorts" that I had in my underwear drawers. To me, and maybe it was because they were strange to me, the male underwear was not as comfortable, particularly with wider waistbands that keep folding down.

Even wearing ladies underwear every day, to me it was not crossdressing, it was just comfortable underwear. I consider myself a crossdresser but I am crossdressing only when I have the shoes and other outerwear, even if it is skinny ladies jeans/jeggings.

[Bobbi46]

Surely and correct me if I am wrong on this but I thought that any item of clothing intended only to be worn by a woman is then worn by a man surely that constitutes crossdressing so therefore wearing womens panties cannot be deemed a fetish just on its because for a person to at that point just to wear panties might be on the cusp of going further in the spectrum of full dressing. Therefore they are crossdressing whether it is obvious they are a crossdresser by wearing feminine outer wear or not. Coupled with the fact of what one presonaly considers one to be, underdressing or going the whole hog is still crossdressing.

[Crissy 107]

Well, we are the most important ones to convince that we're feminine, right? Because 99% of us aren't fooling anyone.

It's crossdressing to us, whether we're seen by anyone else or not.

This sounds correct to me. Crissy

[ReineD]

IMO, if an item of women's clothing changes your head space somehow, or it makes you feel good, or it just brings you comfort, then you're CDing.

[audreyinalbany]

as usual, I think Reine is right & I still can't believe the amount of energy we expend on this site debating definitions

[Teresa]

Bea,
Lets take the point of any type of CDing . The items used are all expressions of an inner need , some deal with it by a pair of panties , they may want more but circumstances may not permit it . Others like myself can dress full time to deal with TG and GD issues , so underdressing doesn't really mean too much now .

Daisy may be partly right but I don't agree with the comfort or lack of it when wearing female underwear , It is more comfortable if you choose the right fit and style . YFronts and male clothes really are harsh and uncomfortable to me now , nothing to do with the fetish element . I agree with Charlotte , public or private has very little bearing on the basic need .

Why do we have to put down the person who admits to a little underdressing ? Many of us have taken the little stepping stones as we progress down the road , it's partly why I post my experiences now , to give others just starting on the road a little encouragement . I don't understand the put downs from supposedly like minded people . Many of us have suffered the shame and guilt associated with it from wives/partners surely it shouldn't happen here on the forum .

[Bobbi46]

Just panties or just tights or whatever its still crossdressing no getting away from the fact and also a part of ones self expression, how one sees oneself, how one is comfortable at the level they are at.
The straight up and down of it is, it is crossdressing.

[Fran in skirts]

I have to agree with Teresa. We are who we believe we are and no one can say different. I started out with just panties but a medical condition caused me to move forward to skirts. Now I wear almost all clothing made to be worn by a woman. I still wear men's shirts at times. I would wear shoes made for woman but they don't make "Flintone sizes".

I consider my self a man and have no desire to be a woman or try to pass for a woman. I have no problem with those who do. So am I a cross dresser sure, OK but who cares??

Fran

[Tracii G]

Just brings us back to what I said earlier there is no right answer.
Threads like this always end up in bickering and members getting mad at each other.

[Paula DAngelo]

Just brings us back to what I said earlier there is no right answer.
Threads like this always end up in bickering and members getting mad at each other.

Traci,
Just goes to show how much common sense you have and how smart you are. And your points are exactly why I don't bother getting involved in posts like these.

[LelaK]

I used to wear panties because they were more comfortable than men's underwear. Initially I enjoyed feeling feminine in them, but before long that feeling diminished and it was only for the comfort that I wore them. The hems and waist bands of men's underwear (briefs) were too thick for me, which caused the discomfort. Also, panties were usually smoother. I'd love to have the luxury of going all out to look as feminine as possible, but until that opportunity arises, I'm content to wear a miniskirt to get my quota of feminine feelings. On second thought, maybe it's time for my lovely purple dress and padded bra.

[Bea_]

Apologies Bea, but your OP did state "Since i wear panties probably 360 out of 365 days, I pretty much say every day". Only fair to assume from that that you consider yourself an everyday full-time crossdresser because of the panties. If that is an incorrect assumption maybe you shouldn't have said it so clearly. I also went on to make it quite clear that if you consider that 'dressing' then that is your perogative and fine by me. You asked what we consider dressing and I told you.

The second paragraph of my original post DID further the point of the sentence you quote here. Yet you ignored the rest of what i had to say before your rant against me and my kind.

I'd say that, if it were only panties, I probably would not really feel the need to even enter any conversation on this site. Panties go a long way to allowing me to enjoy a little indulgence, (which has VERY little to do with sex for me). They're a stand in for all the things that I'd like to wear, but cannot at any given time, for whatever reason. You can discount that fact and denounce me, but I'll just disagree.

Your response was rude and uncalled for, and an apology with the kind of justifications you give just doesn't come across as an apology at all. Others have characterized your rant as 'just being honest'. Since most of what you said was totally inaccurate for my case, where is the honesty?

I'm not in a competition to out-crossdress anyone.

[Helen_Highwater]

Due to being away on my hols I've come late to this debate so having read the thread here's my take:

I don't know if dressing within the confines of your 4 walls, and by dressing I initially thought anything other than all female attire, constitutes CD'ing as opposed to a form of fetish dressing. But the I looked back on my own development and I was one of those who dressed fully in femme attire but due to the lack of support offered here didn't even dream of fully presenting in public.

So was I a non CD'er? Purely a fetishist? In hindsight I would say no. It was I just didn't have the vision to imagine what was possible.

So now as someone who will present fully enfemme in public when circumstance allows I class myself as a CD'er. If at other time I'm just underdressing in knickers do I then loose that status?

I feel the answer lies more in the individuals desires and aspirations. If your goal is to be ever more femme in your appearance without any sexual gratification element then I believe you can class yourself as fully CD. If you gain a level of sexual fulfillment from dressing then perhaps you're partially there.

At the end of the day perhaps what's needed is a level of tolerance that says if you desire to be even a little bit more femme in what you wear then until society accepts us all for what and how we are, we're all in the same boat. Let's be nice to each other.

[Bea_]

The way I see it, “Dressing” is wearing any article of women’s outer wear (As opposed to just panties or under garments which would be “underdressing”. Getting done all the way up with hair and makeup etc. is “presenting”. Those are my personal definitions anyway.

Thank you Micki. This is the type of information I was hoping for in my original post.

[Crissy 107]

Thank you Helen! I am an underdresser not because I don’t want to do more but that is the level of acceptance I currently have from my wife. I do get pedicures with color at a salon but I am in drab, I know I am a cross dresser. Too bad we actually have to argue to be considered that. Like Helen said, we are all in the same boat. Just my 2 cents worth. Crissy

[Beverley Sims]

Dressing is putting clothes on a naked body.

I would dare to say in the context of your question, dressing in clothing of the opposite sex, or the the opposite gender to which you were assigned at birth.