Let's start from the position that we're all here because we are drawn, in one way or another, to the feminine. As has been stated here many times before there is a trans spectrum and all of us, even those who are not here, and those who never dress, and would never dress, occupy a space on that spectrum. We are all individuals and we all do what works for us. As a group we should, as we all have many things in common, support and share experiences for the good of each of us.
It has also been said before that there are probably as many reasons that people cross dress as there are people who cross dress. We are not peas in a pod.
The one thing that we all have in common through is that something, somewhere triggers an interest in us, towards the feminine and the female. To put it slightly more bluntly we are all cross dressers because we all, to some degree or other, wear ladies clothes.
This isn't a choice that we necessarily make, it is often, (it was in my case), made for us. I was a regular cross dresser from the age of 4 which is well before I knew that cross dressing happened. In my case it just happened, I had an inner feeling of girl and I had to express it the only way I knew how. As such, this cross dressing life is the only life I know. Each and everyone of us will have our own 'origin' story and there will be common themes and also our own individual elements.
So, all of this, in one way or another comes down to how we feel, how we interact, how we perceive ourselves on the spectrum. For many of us, we want to *be* (that is experience, to feel, to express ourselves, not necessarily transition), the best woman we can be, our vision of the ideal woman. We are drawn to the silky, the lacy, the frilly, the loose and flowing, the mundane even, the everyday nitty-gritty of women's wear. But, this is where we start to diverge, how realistic is our vision of what the ideal woman is? Are we, in doing what we do, in striving to do this, in fact helping to perpetuate negative stereotypes that women have to fight against every day?
And our one big problem in all of this, ok, we have many problems, but the common thread that runs through this forum, the most often repeated bugbear that we all face is finding acceptance, not necessarily inner acceptance, but acceptance from society, and more close to home, family, friends and significant others.
But, and this is my question, how concerned are we, in our desire to be, to show the world, or to show ourselves as the best women that we can be, how concerned are we with what it is like, to understand the real life experiences of the world as lived by real world women? Because I think that is is one of the big areas where we as a group, not necessarily individually, but as a group where we fall down.
We have to remember that a bit over 50% of the population are women and yet, they are still have nothing like equality, even in our western society, never mind the rest of the world, we can start with our own backyards first. And having women on board, having women fighting in our corner could be a massive bonus for us, it could also help in the battle for acceptance that so many here seek in their own relationships.
But to do that, we need to see things from a woman's perspective, we need to empathise, with them, we have to understand the place in the world which we, that is men, men in general, allow them to have. There is a huge power imbalance in the world and we should play our part in being the solution.
I'm not going to be specific here, but it doesn't take very long if you read threads with open eyes, to find posts which demonstrate what I'm talking about here. It has been said, and I to some extent agree with this that one of the main problems of cross dressers is that we want all of the good bits of being a woman without any of the bad. There are many stories in the media at the moment which show the imbalance in the world between the sexes. I think that this is the kind of thinking which we could and should try to do something about and in so doing, we could advance our cause greatly. It's a win-win situation. But, it's not easy and it can't be done overnight. But, we can play out part in this.
I don't expect this thread to have a great or positive reaction but if it makes even one person think then it will have served it purpose.